Oh boy did I ever mess up!

Oh wow - I had a bad miscommunication with my therapist tonight. It has made me completely embarrassed - he acted all weird on me, and there really was no reason for it - it wasn't what he thought at all.

I felt really bad/uncomfortable about something and so didn't say it earlier - actually I didn't get a chance - we had a weird session - a little bit of this and that and some business stuff he wanted to talk about - and so I felt frustrated about the session in general anyway.

So this one thing I threw in quickly at the end of the session because I felt a need to get it out there - and my therapist took it wrong and acted all weird and rushed me out.

I feel horrible. I sure messed this up and just because of being uncomfortable - I was also very tired too and that didn't help. I feel so embarrassed, I don't know if I can go back or not.

I really felt a need for therapy too and so I feel everything is messed up and I won't get what I need.

Other things are not going well in my life either (a lot of other things) and well - just what I needed. I sure messed it up!

I emailed the therapist to try and apologize/explain - don't know if that will do any good or not - maybe not. I probably just messed up therapy for good.

I just should not do therapy anymore - I am just terrible at it! I never seem to know how to do things right.

((((((((((((((((((cocoa)))))))))))))))))))))))
please dont pressure yourself by expecting a right or wrong way for therapy..you did not mess up for good!....if that t doesnt get it ....t may not be the right one for you....waiting sucks, but until you speak again please be kind to yourself and don't mindread or catastrophize till then

i know how hard it is and am wishing you peace

One thing I have learned in life is what I think is a major F up usually isn't that bad to others. Don't try to mind read what your T thinks, wait for his email response. I know how hard it is not to jump to conclusions, but you can't.

I hope T responds quickly and puts your mind at ease.

((((((((((cocoa)))))))))))

ugh, I hate the feeling that I've said something I "shouldn't have" in T. But we do NOT have to be perfect in therapy. We don't.

I hope T responds to your e-mail and you get some relief. It's so painful and difficult to be in the waiting place.

Know that we are WAY harder on ourselves than other people are on us. It will be okay.

Thank you - I am awfully tired but you make sense - I did get a little reassurance from my therapist and so I think we can talk about it next time.

My anxiety level is awfully high and I wish I could get that down.
thanks, cocoa58

Thanks - he did reassure me we were ok. It helped. I have a joint session tomorrow with my husband and I'm a complete basketcase.

But my T says he will ensure a safe enviromment - I will hang onto that.

If you knew how to do therapy "right" (whatever that means) you might not need it. Be gentle with yourself; misunderstandings are going to happen in therapy, but they can almost always be worked out with a competent therapist.