[WikidPissah]

It's Tues again, T day. Seems every Tues it takes 50 min to turn me inside out. It takes a week for me to get right-side out, then I go right back and get flipped inside out again. Why do I put myself thru this, week after week? It just doesn't seem like a healthy way to live.

[granite1]

hopefully this will only be temporarry eileen.maybe you should let your T know you are having a hard time getting yourself back together after sesson.maybe he will be able to help you with that bye letting you email or something.

[rainbow8]

((((((Eileen))))))

Do you have goals for your therapy? What are you trying to get out of it? My T likes the quote, "The only way out is through". You may be turned inside out now, but do you know what you want about yourself to be different? Therapy is hard work and takes time. Do you like this T? Can you tell him how you're feeling about therapy? It's been a few months. Maybe he's not the right T for you?

[WikidPissah]

Originally Posted by granite1

.maybe he will be able to help you with that bye letting you email or something.

that would be nice. He gave me his email the very first session, but it doesn't work, he must have changed it or something. I think that would be a help though...if I could just get up the nerve to ask

Originally Posted by rainbow8

((((((Eileen))))))

Do you have goals for your therapy? What are you trying to get out of it? My T likes the quote, "The only way out is through". You may be turned inside out now, but do you know what you want about yourself to be different? Therapy is hard work and takes time. Do you like this T? Can you tell him how you're feeling about therapy? It's been a few months. Maybe he's not the right T for you?

My goal is to go back to accounting, to be stable and live life again. It seems to me that the longer I am "out of my life" the harder it will be to "re-enter it"....if that makes sense. I'm squeamish...I don't want to go thru, I want to build a bridge over it. lol I do like this T, he is way different from my last few T's...less formal, more relaxed. It's just bringing up a lot of emotion, when I am quite fine being numb. But being numb isn't getting me back into my life either.

[WePow]

Sending tons of hugs. I have to listen to "my T song" the day of therapy so I will be "ok" - for me, it is James Taylor Handy Man . And you are right, it is easier to be numb - but going through it will heal.

[zooropa]

oh my god. This is exactly how I feel. Exactly. I go into session one person, walk out a bunch of broken up parts and then spend the rest of the week putting the pieces back together again. I have to believe it's for a reason, it's to achieve real, deep healing, or I would never have the courage to go back. As soon as I pull into Ts parking lot I feel like I'm gonna puke

[deliquesce]

i have told austin-t that he needs to put me back together again enough so that i can make it through the week. i had a few sessions a while back where i really struggled to keep it together during the following week, and after that i said - look, i know the work we're doing is good, but i need to still keep on with the rest of my life in between. so now we wrap up earlier and spend the remaining time putting me back together, grounding me, talking about the rest of my week etc. it helps me leave the room feeling a bit more together & able to cope.

[granite1]

how you doing tonight eileen

[WikidPissah]

It actually wasn't too bad this week. We talked a bit about how hard last week was, and he said it was HIS responsibility to judge how I am doing and not let me leave in that shape. He actually apologized. lol We spent some time talking about coping methods (my bad ones)..and then about 10 minutes doing relaxation and grounding. I left in good shape He gave me an assignment, but...my bad...I was so freaked that I can't remember what it was, ugh.

[lissangil]

(((Eileen))))You are pressing forward.I wonder how you are feeling now?