Hello PC Friends,

I cried a lot in my session Friday, which I guess was good because at least there was some emotional release as I only cried maybe 4 times in the whole 15 months or so I've been seeing this therapist. We weren't really talking about anything too touchy, just various practical things and suddenly I just got overwhelmed with emotion, melted down and told her I just want to go away and escape somewhere for a while. Escape from the emotional burden, escape from some changes going on in my life, just get away from everything. In the midst of this little meltdown in T's office, I felt like she was somewhat disconnected, which was bothersome considering I was being so open and just letting her see how I really felt in that moment. Has anyone ever felt disconnect from T while being open about stuff? Some stuff just hit the fan this weekend (yesterday) in regards to my job and I just generally feel like EVERYTHING is falling apart right now. I have no support IRL and just feel alone.

[rainbow_rose]

[Chronic]

Sorry your T seemed disconnected. I can imagine that would be very difficult to deal with when you were letting yourself be vulnerable with T. Sorry things are difficult right now...we are here for you, keep posting if you need to

[SpiritRunner]

(((((((((ttgb)))))))))))

Hugs. It was good for you to get some release.

[nannypat]

Originally Posted by TryinToGetBy

Hello PC Friends,

I cried a lot in my session Friday, which I guess was good because at least there was some emotional release as I only cried maybe 4 times in the whole 15 months or so I've been seeing this therapist. We weren't really talking about anything too touchy, just various practical things and suddenly I just got overwhelmed with emotion, melted down and told her I just want to go away and escape somewhere for a while. Escape from the emotional burden, escape from some changes going on in my life, just get away from everything. In the midst of this little meltdown in T's office, I felt like she was somewhat disconnected, which was bothersome considering I was being so open and just letting her see how I really felt in that moment. Has anyone ever felt disconnect from T while being open about stuff? Some stuff just hit the fan this weekend (yesterday) in regards to my job and I just generally feel like EVERYTHING is falling apart right now. I have no support IRL and just feel alone.

I am soooo sorry you felt your T was not connecting with your outpouring of your heart. I wish I could have been there to hold your hand and tell you to just let it all out because that's what T should have told you to do. We all need to just let it go sometimes and get it all out.It doesn't solve all our problems but it gives us some emotional space to work on what we need to do a little at a time.
I don't have a lot of support IRL either but there is great support on this site and it has help me so many times to fill in for what I don't have IRL.I hope you can tell your T you didn't feel like she was hearing you and how you can work that out so it will feel better in the future. Sending you big hugs.

[dizgirl2011]

Hey hun,

I am glad you managed to release some of the pain and emotion building up inside of you. What was it that made you feel that your therapist was disconnected? Did she do somethin differently to what she normally does? Or was there perhaps something you hoped she would do?
I Hope things improve for you and remember you can talk to us here!

*massive hugs*
xxxx

NannyPat, thank you for your kind and supportive words. I have been crying since Friday off and on and that is one reason why I reached out here. I thought after the session Friday, I would have left feeling supported from my T, warm, and able to carry that with me through the week. I drove home from that session crying my eyes out because I left feeling like I'm just her 12 noon time slot that shed some tears that day. Nothing more.

Dizgirl, she just seemed so distant and I felt as though she didn't shine through during a time I really needed her to. I needed her to tell me I was safe there in her office and that I didn't need to escape from all the things I wanted to escape from. I felt like as I was melting down in my session that there was a robot looking at me. And it hurts. I am so hurt. From lots of things. Not just that. Just feeling so alone and hurt, with nobody to physically reach out and touch to feel secure. I feel supported here at PC, but I need for someone to physically be beside me. The void I feel right now is making almost hard to breath.

[nannypat]

Originally Posted by TryinToGetBy

NannyPat, thank you for your kind and supportive words. I have been crying since Friday off and on and that is one reason why I reached out here. I thought after the session Friday, I would have left feeling supported from my T, warm, and able to carry that with me through the week. I drove home from that session crying my eyes out because I left feeling like I'm just her 12 noon time slot that shed some tears that day. Nothing more.

Dizgirl, she just seemed so distant and I felt as though she didn't shine through during a time I really needed her to. I needed her to tell me I was safe there in her office and that I didn't need to escape from all the things I wanted to escape from. I felt like as I was melting down in my session that there was a robot looking at me. And it hurts. I am so hurt. From lots of things. Not just that. Just feeling so alone and hurt, with nobody to physically reach out and touch to feel secure. I feel supported here at PC, but I need for someone to physically be beside me. The void I feel right now is making almost hard to breath.

How are you feeling today? Any better? I know how hard it is when you feel like you just need that human contact. I have recently re-connected with an old friend and we do hug when we say goodbye. I haven't shared with her how important that is to me,but she seems really comfortable with it also so maybe she has an unspoken need for it also. It would be nice to have someone who knows more about my depression and issues etc. to give me a hug, but that just isn't there right now for me either. I know I crave it also. I hope you feel a little better today.

Thank You NannyPat for your support and caring words. I don't really think I could say I feel better perse, but I just numbed it out today. There is just a lot going on and all I can really do is just take things minute by minute. Thank you for asking how I feel today. I just hate feeling so overwhelmed all the time.