[ladyjrnlist]

For those of you who don't know, I had to quit my T after a year because he started making moves on me. I haven't spoken to him in a month now. I filed a complaint and got a new T.
Oddly, I really miss my old T because the transference was very strong and I thought I loved him. Still wonder if I do sometimes. I think about him a lot still. It's terrible. Just terrible.
I feel so betrayed and heartbroken. He told me he loved me and wanted to be with me. How could he just turn it off so fast like this?
I know, because it wasn't real to begin with. But, it still hurts like hell.
I don't like feeling so out of control and like such a wimp.
Of all the people to hurt me after I've been hurt so badly since I was a kid. My whole freaking life abused and and taken advantage of. And now the most trusted person in my life aside from my mother and husband does it to me again.
How much more am I expected to take? Seriously?
I am all out of love.

[rainbow8]

I'm so sorry, ladyj. I hope you know it's all your T's fault, not YOURS. Are you talking about him and your feelings with your new T? I hope so, as that will help you a lot.

Have you read threads in our subforum on romantic feelings for T's and abuse by T's? There's a lot of helpful posts there.

I hope that your new T will help you heal and to feel love once again. You deserve to feel good about yourself.

Don't be hard on yourself for still having feelings for your old T. That is normal; he was your T and you trusted and loved him, and he betrayed you! Again, please discuss all this with your new T.

[geez]

Hey ((((lady))))

I'm so sorry your ex T created this situation with you. Such awful feelings to endure. We are here for you and I'm happy that you have a new T!

[Wren_]

it doesn't sound odd that you miss him ... just really horrible for you that you were hurt so badly by someone who you should have been able to trust I hope, along with Rainbow, that your new T is able to help you with all of this and that you keep sharing here

[lastyearisblank]

What he did was so bad. Not just saying that but the repercussions. It is hard enough to end T on a good note but the whole unresolved thing just makes it so much harder. I'll tell you what you already know- he does not deserve to be missed. But it is hard to turn off those feelings right away. I feel like when you end a relationship with someone it comes and goes in waves and you might miss them more sometimes. I hope the new T is helping to talk about it.

I'm so sorry that he did that to you. Well done for doing the right thing for yourself. I know it doesn't make it feel any better, but it's great that you were able to do that.

I really hope that with time your new T will be able to help.

[Butterflies Are Free]

I am so sorry this happened to you!