[Maliya]

I am totally lost and frustrated here, really hoping someone can point me in the right direction. I have had serious issues with anxiety, depression and self esteem for years and years. I am currently taking a semester off (from school) in the hope of moving forward with some of these issues but I feel I am making NO PROGRESS and I really really need to get somewhere.

I need someone to help me with self confidence issues (I hate myself completely, and I'm sick of feeling that way), give me tools for dealing with anxiety and depression, and help me become the person I know I could be if I could get over these issues.

I really need help finding out what time of therapy or person that might be... I have tried talk therapy, which was fine but not particularly growth inducing, as well as some EMDR which I JUST began. Open to any and ALL suggestions.

Please please help!

[SoupDragon]

I think CBT can be good as a shorter term therapy to deal with specific issues such as anxiety / depression to get you to a stage of functioning in the world. But psychotherapy is longer term and gets to the route of the problem. There are many different types of pscyhotherapy, but I have read that it really is not so important which approach of psychotherapy the T uses, the best outcome is connected to the strength of your wokring relationship with the T - in other words if you and T get along OK, then you are likely to benefit - I am sure though that the skills of the T must also count towards success.

What kinds of "talk therapy" have you tried?

[Travelinglady]

I agree that CBT is good for concrete immediate help. I also think that the main thing is letting your therapist know what you're specifically seeking help for and seeing if that person is able/willing to get down to addressing those topics with you!

You might begin here by looking at the anxiety forum. My T has recommended various CD's on coping with anxiety and relaxation tapes, too. But I definitely agree that having a face-to-face T relationship is always important.

[Maliya]

Thank you for your immediate responses! I was thinking CBT might be the right thing as well. I am currently doing some work on anxiety with hypnotherapy / EMDR and relaxation things, so I think I have that covered. What I need is what CBT sounds like, something that is goal and solution based and will give me specific tools to get there.

The kind of talk therapy I have done is basically my T would sit and listen while I described what I was going through. Kind of paying someone to listen to me all the time

[SoupDragon]

Originally Posted by Maliya

Thank you for your immediate responses! I was thinking CBT might be the right thing as well. I am currently doing some work on anxiety with hypnotherapy / EMDR and relaxation things, so I think I have that covered. What I need is what CBT sounds like, something that is goal and solution based and will give me specific tools to get there.

The kind of talk therapy I have done is basically my T would sit and listen while I described what I was going through. Kind of paying someone to listen to me all the time

The other thing that I do that helps me at times is Mindfulness - in the UK you can do courses, but it is also available on-line - this can help with both anxiety and depression.

http://www.bemindfulonline.com/

There are other on-line programmes too.

[ggwatkins]

Originally Posted by Maliya

I am totally lost and frustrated here, really hoping someone can point me in the right direction. I have had serious issues with anxiety, depression and self esteem for years and years. I am currently taking a semester off (from school) in the hope of moving forward with some of these issues but I feel I am making NO PROGRESS and I really really need to get somewhere.

I need someone to help me with self confidence issues (I hate myself completely, and I'm sick of feeling that way), give me tools for dealing with anxiety and depression, and help me become the person I know I could be if I could get over these issues.

I really need help finding out what time of therapy or person that might be... I have tried talk therapy, which was fine but not particularly growth inducing, as well as some EMDR which I JUST began. Open to any and ALL suggestions.

Please please help!

I am also doing EMDR and find it helpful. But I also do a lot of my own therapy at home using bibliotherapy such as Dialectical Behavioral Therapy. DBT gives you coping mechanisms to use immediately when you begin to feel depressed or stressed out. Try journaling and get your thoughts on paper. That way they don't stay inside you. Journaling has been a life-saving outlet for me. I will pray that you find the right therapist and methods that work best for you. I have struggled and am still struggling with depression and anxiety. Whats important for you to remember is that you are not alone in this. God will guide you. Self hate is a destructive emotion. Try to think of at least one good thing to say about yourself each day. Keep it in a journal and believe it.

"Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. It is that we are powerful beyond measure." Marianne Moore

[Maliya]

Journaling has saved me a lot as well. Bibliotherapy... what does that mean exactly? Based on your own history?

[sunrise]

Originally Posted by Maliya

I have tried talk therapy

What kind of talk therapy did you try that didn't work too well? There are so many kinds--CBT, psychodynamic, gestalt, interpersonal, humanistic, etc.

Originally Posted by Maliya

I need someone to help me with self confidence issues (I hate myself completely, and I'm sick of feeling that way), give me tools for dealing with anxiety and depression, and help me become the person I know I could be if I could get over these issues.

This paragraph made me think maybe you might find humanistic therapy helpful. Humanistic is all about human potential, helping you become the person you can be, helping with self confidence, etc. It isn't really "tools focused", but combining humanistic with an approach strong on tools (mild CBT?) might be a good mix.

I think having a kind therapist who really "gets" you and values you will also help with self esteem and confidence. A therapist strong on unconditional positive regard... (again, the humanist connection)

Good luck, Maliya.

[CantExplain]

I have read - and I believe it - that all "talking" therapies are fundamentally the same. Whatever the specific theory, it's a balance of supporting the patient and challenging the patient's assumptions. Only two things matter:

1. The therapist's belief in the therapy
2. The quality of the relationship between the therapist and the patient.

I'm sure this doesn't help you!