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#1
Dec 10, 2011, 07:59 PM
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hi peeps........ugh.........my emotions are so off the chart the past few days. i feel so depressed and so angry at nothing ( maybe at my stupid emotions ). it seems like monday thrpough thursday i'm much more stable and much less emotional. then friday, saturday and sunday i feel so messed up. i see my 2 therapists mon.-thur. and then thur. night i fall apart. my emotions particularly this weekend have been really intense ....i just want to say forget life it's too hard. forget therapy it's too hard. forget not cutting because really who the f... cares? so i'm thinking i'll call my t but really what's the difference she can't fix me on a phone call...or i can't fix my friggin self on a phone call from her. if i called her she would call me in the am. i need someone tonight. or do i? ...ugh...
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 kaliope, mixedup_emotions, WePow
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#2
Dec 10, 2011, 09:30 PM
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(((((((Kasva))))) can you use email to her? It feels like you need to reach out right now. Do you know what it is you need to say or what you need said to you?
__________________
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#3
Dec 10, 2011, 09:32 PM
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I've always found weekends to be harder, especially earlier in therapy. Weekdays have more of a "routine" to them, and I think that helps me stay more "okay". And on weekdays, T feels "there"...I only see him once a week, but I know he's in his office and I can find him if I need him. On the weekend, he kind of "disappears", and I feel alone with my stuff.
I'm glad you reached out here. And if you need to call T, call. I always feel like "how could HE help?"...but somehow, he always does. 
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#4
Dec 10, 2011, 09:43 PM
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This pain is the evidence that you are making progress. Keep going!
__________________
Mr Ambassador, alias Ancient Plax, alias Captain Therapy, alias Big Poppa, alias Secret Spy, etc. Add that to your tattoo, Baby! |
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#5
Dec 10, 2011, 09:49 PM
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thank you guys.....i dont what i need to say or anything about what i would need said....i'm just feeling so hopeless ..and so f..k it....i might ask t if this ois progress?
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| kaliope
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#6
Dec 10, 2011, 09:50 PM
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it does not feel like progress it feels like i've gone way backwards
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| kaliope
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#7
Dec 10, 2011, 09:52 PM
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Sometimes just feeling the pain is a part of the healing. :-( I HATED that part of the therapy process!!! I would write T all sorts of emails at midnight when it hurt the most and made no sense at all. My heart goes out to you.
__________________
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#8
Dec 10, 2011, 10:07 PM
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Quote:
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#9
Dec 10, 2011, 10:16 PM
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thank you we pow...sweepy you sound a lot like what i feel....i wouldn't even begin to know how to release so many mixed up emotions...give me on emotion and maybe...maybe....but.....ugh.....i wish t had email that would probably help just to spew it out............
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| mixedup_emotions
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#10
Dec 11, 2011, 12:40 AM
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((((( kasva )))))
I can soooo relate to having all sorts of mixed up emotions (hence my username, LOL). The other night, I was feeling SO out of control....feeling all sorts of things I couldn't even describe...and then I put my hands on my keyboard and just let stuff out...it didn't matter if it made sense or not....just typing..... It ultimately led to the email that I sent to T....and it did help - although I regretted it at the time. Feeling awful is part of the process, unfortunately. If your T doesn't have email, it still may help to type up - or write out - whatever works for you - anything and everything that comes to mind....that you feel...that you think...anything. Post it on PC. Hold onto it until your next session. Read it to T's voicemail. The act of trying to get those feelings into words and OUT is what may be cathartic.... ((( HUGS )))
__________________
Don't follow the path that lies before you. Instead, veer from the path - and leave a trail... 
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 kasva
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#11
Dec 11, 2011, 01:10 AM
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Quote:
__________________
Mr Ambassador, alias Ancient Plax, alias Captain Therapy, alias Big Poppa, alias Secret Spy, etc. Add that to your tattoo, Baby! |
| kasva, Sannah
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#12
Dec 11, 2011, 01:01 PM
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It is hard on the weekends for me as well. "just" carrying it with us is so incrediably hard sometimes.
Hope you are feeling better today as sometimes a new morning/day seems to sometimes lessen the intense pain of rough nights. |
| kasva
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This is an old thread. You probably should not post your reply to it, as the original poster is unlikely to see it.|
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