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#1
Jan 11, 2012, 09:29 PM
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i told my therapist how i feel about her (amidst tears and an anxiety attack
 ) it was so so hard. i never expected to go 'there'  ... but 'there' i was...she was so awesome about it.  so supportive. so amazing.she accepts me and how i feel - which is a great example to show me how to accept myself 'cause i'm having a hard time accepting how i feel. it's actually very overwhelming to have someone show such compassion toward me. i'm so not used to that, especially from myself. it's good to 'see' what that 'looks' like. my goal this year was to go deeper. i think this is a good start.
__________________
Happiness cannot be found through great effort and willpower, but is already present, in open relaxation and letting go. Don't strain yourself, there is nothing to do or undo. Whatever momentarily arises in the body-mind Has no real importance at all, has little reality whatsoever. Don't believe in the reality of good and bad experiences; they are today's ephemeral weather, like rainbows in the sky. ~Venerable Lama Gendun Rinpoche~ 
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 Anonymous100153, Anonymous32732, Anonymous33425, Chopin99, delicatefade26, gma45, Joanna_says, JustWannaDisappear, learning1, Nelliecat, pbutton, rainbow8, WePow, yang0868
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 BashfulBear, crazycanbegood, Joanna_says, JustWannaDisappear, Nelliecat, rainbow8, Unrigged64072835, wintergirl
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#2
Jan 11, 2012, 09:36 PM
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Nice work!
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| rainbow_rose
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#3
Jan 11, 2012, 09:48 PM
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Yes, that was an excellent place to start going deeper in therapy. I'm so glad your therapist responded so well. Way to go!!
__________________
Go confidently in the direction of your dreams. Live the life you have imagined. - Henry David Thoreau |
| rainbow_rose
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#4
Jan 11, 2012, 09:50 PM
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yay ,wow,amaing.that had to be so so scary but was it awsome to hear what she had to say?
__________________
BEHAVIORS ARE EASY WORDS ARE NOT  Dx, HUMAN Rx, no medication for that |
| rainbow_rose
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#5
Jan 11, 2012, 09:55 PM
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yay! good for you!
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| rainbow_rose
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#6
Jan 11, 2012, 09:55 PM
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That's really wonderful! I think it was really brave of you to say it out loud, I really want to talk about this with my T too but I keep chickening out to say what I'm really feeling out loud, so this is inspiring.
I'm really glad she responded so well, too, it sounds like you have a great T.
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| rainbow_rose
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#7
Jan 11, 2012, 10:18 PM
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Quote:
__________________
Happiness cannot be found through great effort and willpower, but is already present, in open relaxation and letting go. Don't strain yourself, there is nothing to do or undo. Whatever momentarily arises in the body-mind Has no real importance at all, has little reality whatsoever. Don't believe in the reality of good and bad experiences; they are today's ephemeral weather, like rainbows in the sky. ~Venerable Lama Gendun Rinpoche~
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#8
Jan 11, 2012, 10:39 PM
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I'm smiling, rainbow_rose!!
I'm so happy for you. I know how hard it is to tell your T how you feel about her (it's still hard for me; even though I've been honest with my T about my feelings I still get embarrassed) but like you discovered, it is SO worth it!! 
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| rainbow_rose
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#9
Jan 11, 2012, 10:43 PM
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Woot woot!! great job!! Definitely tough but soo worth it!
__________________
"Wake me up...when September ends" 
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| rainbow_rose
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#10
Jan 12, 2012, 08:36 AM
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pbutton, granite, Chopin99, struggling2, amaj910, rainbow8, delicatefade26 - thank you so much!!!
 the session really hit me last night ... finally feeling the emotional reaction to the session, which i understood. what I didn't understand was the fear that i felt. and i slept really really deeply. wow... i'm exhausted. i guess the session took more out of me than i realized. wish i could just sleep for hours.
__________________
Happiness cannot be found through great effort and willpower, but is already present, in open relaxation and letting go. Don't strain yourself, there is nothing to do or undo. Whatever momentarily arises in the body-mind Has no real importance at all, has little reality whatsoever. Don't believe in the reality of good and bad experiences; they are today's ephemeral weather, like rainbows in the sky. ~Venerable Lama Gendun Rinpoche~
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| rainbow8
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#11
Jan 12, 2012, 08:38 AM
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Congrats! I know how hard that can be.
__________________
wheeler |
| rainbow_rose
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#12
Jan 12, 2012, 11:37 PM
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(((rainbow rose))) wow
that's wonderful you were able to share, and yes you really did begin the year well, i'm proud of you and so happy that she responded with such compassion and care
__________________
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| rainbow_rose
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#13
Jan 13, 2012, 12:31 PM
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i love this!!! Especially about the sleeping so soundly
wahoo! did I mention wwahoo! |
| rainbow_rose
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#14
Jan 13, 2012, 08:52 PM
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Quote:
Quote:
Quote:
__________________
Happiness cannot be found through great effort and willpower, but is already present, in open relaxation and letting go. Don't strain yourself, there is nothing to do or undo. Whatever momentarily arises in the body-mind Has no real importance at all, has little reality whatsoever. Don't believe in the reality of good and bad experiences; they are today's ephemeral weather, like rainbows in the sky. ~Venerable Lama Gendun Rinpoche~
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#15
Jan 13, 2012, 11:07 PM
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Woot woot! I'm excited to hear what happen from this point in ya'lls relationship!
__________________
"Wake me up...when September ends"
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| rainbow_rose
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#16
Jan 14, 2012, 12:51 PM
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Quote:
thanks, delicatefade. i'm excited to find out too!the reality of the session is really hitting me, tho. i can't let these feelings get in the way of the work. I won't let them. stupid feelings.  (i know i won't always feel this way... this is how I feel today  )
__________________
Happiness cannot be found through great effort and willpower, but is already present, in open relaxation and letting go. Don't strain yourself, there is nothing to do or undo. Whatever momentarily arises in the body-mind Has no real importance at all, has little reality whatsoever. Don't believe in the reality of good and bad experiences; they are today's ephemeral weather, like rainbows in the sky. ~Venerable Lama Gendun Rinpoche~
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| Anonymous37798, delicatefade26, pbutton, rainbow8
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#17
Jan 14, 2012, 01:01 PM
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Quote:
I'm sorry to hear you're having a rough time.
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| rainbow_rose
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#18
Jan 14, 2012, 03:26 PM
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Quote:
 How would that be? They are out in the open now...
Last edited by rockymtngal; Jan 14, 2012 at 03:58 PM. |
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#19
Jan 14, 2012, 03:50 PM
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Rainbow Rose: I'm so proud of you. I'm so happy for you. I wish I was as brave as you to tell my T about my feelings for her. I've been trying to do this over the last two sessions and failed miserably. What you did is very inspiring to me. Great job!!!!
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| rainbow_rose
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#20
Jan 14, 2012, 04:02 PM
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Great job! When I had a T years ago I held so much back. Now that I need one and can't afford one I think I would try to be more open. I see from you and this site what a great feeling it is to open up! Way to go!
Last edited by gma45; Jan 14, 2012 at 04:03 PM. Reason: spelling |
| rainbow_rose
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#21
Jan 14, 2012, 04:50 PM
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thanks, pbutton, yang0868 & gma45
Quote:
Quote:
__________________
Happiness cannot be found through great effort and willpower, but is already present, in open relaxation and letting go. Don't strain yourself, there is nothing to do or undo. Whatever momentarily arises in the body-mind Has no real importance at all, has little reality whatsoever. Don't believe in the reality of good and bad experiences; they are today's ephemeral weather, like rainbows in the sky. ~Venerable Lama Gendun Rinpoche~
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#22
Jan 14, 2012, 05:13 PM
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The pain tends to come from us containing what wants/needs to be expressed.
There are healthy and safe ways to express emotions. Giving them a voice is one of the best gifts you can give yourself.
__________________
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| rainbow_rose
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#23
Jan 14, 2012, 09:46 PM
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Quote:
__________________
Happiness cannot be found through great effort and willpower, but is already present, in open relaxation and letting go. Don't strain yourself, there is nothing to do or undo. Whatever momentarily arises in the body-mind Has no real importance at all, has little reality whatsoever. Don't believe in the reality of good and bad experiences; they are today's ephemeral weather, like rainbows in the sky. ~Venerable Lama Gendun Rinpoche~
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| WePow
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| WePow
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#24
Jan 14, 2012, 10:14 PM
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I think I understand what you mean that the feelings don't go away just because they are out in the open. My T knows very well what my feelings are for her, but that doesn't help me to deal with them. It's almost like "so what, now that she knows". I'm still struggling with them just the same as ever. I still have to try to get needs met by others, in RL.
It's painful. Telling your T is step 1, and I agree that it's important. But then the real work starts, the "what am I going to do so I can feel this way about others who can return my feelings?" At the same time, it's okay to feel good about the relationship with your T. For me, it's finding that middle ground that's the problem.
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| rainbow_rose
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#25
Jan 14, 2012, 10:56 PM
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Quote:
but i'm trying to at least feel the feelings... little bit at a time. i'm still in the 'stupid feelings ' phase.my goal is to accept them and actually believe that these feeling are not inappropriate, as my therapist said. in some ways it feel pointless to have such feelings for someone who can't/doesn't/won't return them. i'd rather put my energy elsewhere. blech. session aftermath. yech. 
__________________
Happiness cannot be found through great effort and willpower, but is already present, in open relaxation and letting go. Don't strain yourself, there is nothing to do or undo. Whatever momentarily arises in the body-mind Has no real importance at all, has little reality whatsoever. Don't believe in the reality of good and bad experiences; they are today's ephemeral weather, like rainbows in the sky. ~Venerable Lama Gendun Rinpoche~
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| pbutton, rainbow8, wintergirl
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