[struggling2]

my hubby changed jobs and I just found out our new insurance doesn't cover T. I think I could cry. I've been seeing her for like a year and finally within the last 3-4 months have really opened up with her and have gotten quite attached to her. I told her I was scared of getting attached and she said its ok that it's normal and she thinks there's a reason certain people come into each others lives and she believes there's a reason I'm there with her. I'm devastated and panicking. i was terrified this would happen. I'd get attached and then I'd just have to leave. and I feel crazy cause realizing how upset this has made me.....maybe it's an unhealthy attachment? I dunno...I've never opened up to anybody like this before. ugh. bad start to the week.

[Perna]

Talk to T about the insurance thing, she might be able to write to the company and get included since you are already in treatment. Or, she might have a sliding scale so you can still afford to see her for awhile and/or while you make a transition to a new T covered under the new insurance.

It can be very painful and scary. Did you ever have to move when you were a child, start in a new school in a new place? Whenever I was paying out of pocket for a T and we could not afford it, I got a little part-time job that made enough to pay for T At $8-$10 an hour, only 10 or so hours of work would pay for a week's session. I would have some extra to help contribute to the household and the work helped my self esteem and got me "out there" some.

((((((((struggling))))))))))

I know it's really hard to talk to T about money (it is for me, anyway!), but can you tell T what's going on and see if the two of you can come up with a solution that works for you? My T has worked with me during times when I've run out of insurance/money/whatever...but I did have to ask and be really clear about what I needed.

[struggling2]

i could talk to her i suppose about working with me. i just hate doing that. she's worth the money she charges. im self-employed and its frustrating when people ask you to work with them all the time. almost like what you do is not valued enough to save for or make room for. and its scary to me how sad i am right now. ive felt so connected with her and ive never felt that before. as the same time i was in almost in tears i could feel my brick wall going straight back up going "never again will i let anyone get close. its safer and less emotionally torturous behind this wall" ugh, and above all...she's just a counselor so this is soooo one-sided.