Do you talk about sex with your therapist?

Maybe you are working up to it. Sometimes I do that, I think a lot about talking about something before I have the courage to do so. I am doing that now about a topic but this time instead of feeling pressured (by me), I feel like it is okay and I can let it be, let it continue to emerge and when the time is right... it will happen.

I had a T who was like a mom. She helped me with sex. I felt like i was talking to my sister or a nice mom. I think i know what a nice mom would be like because of her. I miss her. Not to talk about sex just because she understood me and was so nice. I wish she were
my mom. She would be a good mom to my brother and sister too.

Yes, we talk about sex. We talk about all sorts of things about sex. It isn't easy to talk about -- but T's somewhat of an "expert" on sexuality and related issues.

If I didn't talk about sex we would sit there 90% of the time with nothing to talk about. I asked her why we keep on that same subject. Her reply was, "Because it keeps coming back up. It is still causing you a great deal of pain and we need to continue to talk about it."

I honestly wonder what we would talk about if 'that' topic never came up in my therapy at all. I would have been finished a long time ago! Of course, she says it is not "sex" necessarily. It is intimacy and relationships. That is what the culprit really is. Why I have trouble getting close to people and trusting they really do want to be with (around) me.

So when you just talk.... do you just go with the convo?

Cause for me, and my personality type, I just... wait till the other person talks, in which this case is the T.

There's probably gonna be a lot of awkward silences. Which will lead to being deterred not wanted to talk about it anymore. Should I just keep talking to not let any awkward gaps happen?

It's the awkwardness that gets me....

<Sequence Starting>

Me: Hi, Carl. How are you?

T: I am well. How have you been.

Me: Life's been pretty ______.

T: Sounds _____. So tell me, what's going on now adays?

Me: Well, I want to talk about sex~(starts out loud, ends sentence all quiet and mumbly)

T: You want to talk about... shwa? What did you say?

Me: ........... O_O

T: .......... o_o?

Me: Anyway! Uhhh -> change convo elsewhere.

Haha, okay have to try that one! Here the hosp is state nearest private one 200km away so when u go there is a PANNEL of docs JIP the Pdoc a Social worker, a P nurse and a GP so it's kinda like an interview / cross examination and all attention is on you! Then u receive an evaluation form afterwords about ur eye contact and bla bla... So talking about sex NOPE...

That doesn't sound very therapeutic.

I'm confused... O_O Eh? Are we going for an annual check up or a drop in to talk with someone about sex?

It def gets u out of ur comfort zone as it's men and women, but they probably hear weird things all day long!

Are you kidding? I was just jealous I didn't think of it first!

My mother only went to 3rd grade, in Italy, before she was pulled out of school to work on the farm. She writes the most endearing letters, I love her misspellings, they are simply brilliant, I can see how she came up with them. But she thinks i'm laughing at her. It's sad, that she can't appreciate that I DO appreciate her. She wants me to like her for other reasons, if she wants me to like her at all; I wonder. So - it's the thought that counts. sorry for the hijack. I talk about sex to T every chance I get...

Hopefully both!

Yeah, basically I just go for it. It wasn't like that at first, but now that I am growing to trust him more and more I figure I might as well go for broke. I've lived long enough paralyzed by these things. That doesn't mean they come out easily -- or that they all come out at all. But I try to be direct and honest. Sometimes I have to write it down and have him read it.