Why can't I see my therapist's life?

this is NOT messed up, it's an excellent point. you mark the difference between knowing about someone, and knowing someone. Revealing whether one has children, or is a vegetarian, or plays the piano, is for knowing about. Showing one's emotions - ah, that allows the other to know the person.

But AT = IMO it doesn't prove that your T relationship is superficial; it's just unique, and in it the T has to keep a certain distance, for objectivity. It's the reason your best friend (whom you know, not just know about) can't be your therapist.
at any rate, it seems that the relationship will allow a certain amount of knowing about T, but not too much knowing.

I can totally relate to this. With one therapist I had, I knew way too much about her life. In the end I realized that she was really an untrained therapist, (though she'd been the field 25 years, unlicensed) and so really didn't know about boundaries though she claimed too. So I heard (and read online) in articles she posted, about her son's experience with bullying at school, her elderly mothers altshimers, and other issues in her life. I met her teenage son, who it turns out participated in the same training program I was part of for a time as well as a therapy group. Yeah, real ethical issues huh?
Anyway, my VMT therapist has a more middle ground I think. As we worked together more and more slowly I learned more about her. After a long time of talking about my alcoholic family, she told me about her mentally ill sister and how the dynamics are similar. I learned about her relationship with her sons when we were talking about my relationship with my mom. I'd actually love to run into her outside of therapy, I think it would be really neat. I'd proably scream her name and be like hi! I know she has a new puppy, which I met. I'd love to go to her house, but I know that's out.
I would recommend talking with your therapist about this.