[LoneWolfie]

The last several weeks I spend most of my time on weekends wondering what my psychiatrist and act worker are spending their time doing on weekends.

I don't know if it is because I generally spend the entire weekend in the house, I struggle to leave the house on a good day.

This weekend has been really bad and the thought of what they are doing is making me nuts. I'm bored out of my mind and have no inkling to do a thing.

Yes I find I am attached/attracted to my Pdoc. My Pdoc does have a physical disability, I am not sure if it is from her hip but the first time I met her I thought she had a prostetic leg. Anyway she doesn't use any device to help her but you can tell it is difficult for her, sometimes she uses a wall for support as she walks.

So don't imagine her running around her yard with her dogs or anything and I do know she has a male partner. Which I will say pangs me with a bit of jealousy, I am gay with a wife of 12 years.

During the week I know where she is but for some reason weekends really have me wondering.

Guess I am pondering....

[CantExplain]

My fantasy is that they spend their weekends cleansing themselves of the **** that gets dumped on them during the week.

[roads]

Wow, CantExplain, it's probably what they ought to be doing even if it isn't what they do--& and I expect most therapists spend a lot of time "shaking off" work.

LoneWolfie, you know these kinds of feelings for your therapist aren't unusual--right? Or do you see this as something other than a therapist reversal thing? Does it involve your RL love? Can you talk about it in session? Is this a problem that concerns you? You are one of my special-specials, so am I making this into something because I'm thinking I ought to Stanton worrying?
Roadie

[LoneWolfie]

Hi Roadie

I has been a long time my friend. Many months I stayed away from the boards, going through way to much to think about being on the forum. But I would pop in to see if you left me a message.

I realize it isn't unusual just wish I wasn't being consumed by it. I have posted in the romatic feelings for my t about some of this.

Frainkly I would be afraid to bring it up in session. I think we are going to start getting into things now, I have been seeing her for just over 5 months. Before this last appointment I came in an talked about whatever I wanted too.

This last time she definately knew what she wanted to talk about and was not going to be steered away from it, I tried that and was asked "what does that have to do with fill in the blank about what we were discussing?"

Yeah I figure the leave on Friday and take a shitload of deep breathes and forget about us.*S*

What is Stanton worry Roadie?

[Perna]

Originally Posted by LoneWolfie

I'm bored out of my mind

When the cat's away the mice will play Get your head engaged in something else?

There was a time when I felt OBSESSED with knowing what my T did on the weekend. I really, REALLY wanted to know what he was doing, who he was with, if he was happy, etc.

Finally, one weekend, I felt frustrated with how constantly it kept popping into my head, so I decided to just let myself wonder. I went and laid on my bed and set a timer for 15 minutes, and told myself I was going to allow myself to think about T and what he was doing for 15 straight minutes.

I pictured him at the grocery store and the clothing store. I imagined him hiking and mowing the lawn and cooking on the grill.

And I started to get bored.

I had to force myself to get through the 15 minutes. It felt LONG. But I did it, and when I was done, I was DONE. I had let myself imagine, and I was ready to move on.

It was a really helpful exercise, and it freed me and my brain to participate in my real life.

[LoneWolfie]

Originally Posted by Perna

When the cat's away the mice will play Get your head engaged in something else?

Which I could distract myself, alot of people including my psychaitrist say I am in my head way to much.

[LoneWolfie]

Originally Posted by nightsky

There was a time when I felt OBSESSED with knowing what my T did on the weekend. I really, REALLY wanted to know what he was doing, who he was with, if he was happy, etc.

Finally, one weekend, I felt frustrated with how constantly it kept popping into my head, so I decided to just let myself wonder. I went and laid on my bed and set a timer for 15 minutes, and told myself I was going to allow myself to think about T and what he was doing for 15 straight minutes.

I pictured him at the grocery store and the clothing store. I imagined him hiking and mowing the lawn and cooking on the grill.

And I started to get bored.

I had to force myself to get through the 15 minutes. It felt LONG. But I did it, and when I was done, I was DONE. I had let myself imagine, and I was ready to move on.

It was a really helpful exercise, and it freed me and my brain to participate in my real life.

That sounds like a great idea and will try it in a few days, as I am getting company over night and the next two days will be busy. Thanks for the input.

LW

[pbutton]

Originally Posted by LoneWolfie

Which I could distract myself, alot of people including my psychaitrist say I am in my head way to much.

I do this too! I have been working on it. It's nice to get out every now and then.

[kiki86]

i too wonder what my T does on the weekends. i mean i know some of his hobbies and they're all pretty normal but somehow i still imagine him jetting off to the bahamas on the weekends or sky diving or something. like he has this secret amazing life. in reality he's probably as tired as everyone else and does normal things like go to the movies.