My therapy worked.

I've been sad all day about tomorrow's termination session.

I just realized RIGHT NOW that I am not scared or anxious about it. Just sad that I am leaving T. Only sad. Not worried.

I can't even explain how amazing it is that I am not anxious. That's the reason I went to go see T. I had stopped leaving my house, quit driving, and wasn't really eating or going to work.

I'm not scared. I know I can handle it. I really DO carry T with me.

I even know that I won't be THIS sad forever. It's going to be rough, but I will work my way through it. I will miss him but I can make it without him.

I have changed so much. If you had told me last April that I'd be writing a post like this. I would have cried hysterically because would have seemed impossible.

I am a bit in shock right now. I'm mostly writing this down so I can figure out a way to explain it to T. He and I have done some amazing stuff together. Wow.

You and your t have done amazing work together. It has been such a privilege to watch your progress. You have every right to be incredibly proud of yourself and how hard you have worked.

not scared is awesome.

That is progress!! I am so very happy for you! xx
Rose

Congrats, pbutton!

That is wonderful news pbutton!!

Thank you for sharing the news of how you've noticed changes within yourself in the way that you deal with stress and anxiety. Really terrific news.

I am sorry that you're sad to be moving on in life, but that is normal. I'm sure that you probably know that though. Sounds like you've got a solid head on your shoulders. ((hugs))

This sounds quite good. (okay - to me an odd concept, but really good for you).

you go girl!!

it is amazing what the right therapist with the right client can do.

Leaving therapy is so bittersweet. Sadness is the pervasive emotion for me too. It's just grief - but the grief arises from the fullness of the experience, not the ending of it.

It's hard to explain.

However, I was with my old therapist for close to nine years. It was a long long journey.

There are reminders of him strewn all through my life.

I do think it is important that you own your part of the therapy's success as well. You had the courage to change.

Good luck today.

this is wonderful. so happy for you!!

That is awesome!

Fantastic! You've got so much to be proud of.

that's so brilliant! i hope i feel the same way tomorrow after my last session. i'm really interested in this idea of carrying your T with you. what does that mean for you? because my T has been saying that to me for weeks "you can 'keep me in mind'" but i don't know what that really involves!

Totally awesome pbutton. You have done some great work!!

Both of my T's have been pushing that one. I wasn't exactly impressed with it, but I've been chewing on it since they both seem to think it would be helpful to me.

I think for me it means that I know enough where I can imagine T's responses and the ways he's taught me to deal with situations.

For example, yesterday afternoon I was lolling around, feeling VERY sorry for myself. I realized that my therapy had taught me to quit focusing solely on the thing that bothered me - and in order to feel better, I needed to get up off my rump and do something productive. I knew that if I wanted to honor the therapy that I was so determinedly mourning, that I needed to do what I'd learned -- so I got up off my rump and did something productive. I grumbled a little, but it was absolutely the right thing to do. I did feel better. I used the part of my brain that has been molded from T's example and guidance.

Okay now you are just scaring me.





(I am kidding)(somewhat)

LOL stopdog. I don't mean to frighten you. I am feeling overly mushy today. Ending therapy is hard on my brain. Don't worry, I'll be in T's office in 6 hours. I am sure my gut instinct will be to hide any sign of emotion from him, just like always.

(((((pbutton!!)))))))

Ending therapy is hard! But it sounds like you're doing just what you need to do...letting yourself feel the feelings, and focusing on honoring your hard work and all of the things you've learned.

Thinking of you!

Endings are hard. You seem to me to be doing a great job even though it is so hard. Good luck with it this afternoon.

hmm that sounds good. i think i'll remember that. "honoring the therapy" thing. remind me of that tomorrow after i've had my last session and i'm in bed with the covers over my head.

pbutton tomorrrow is my last session as well i will be thinking of u

Kiki & Sweepy, I am thinking of both of you today & I will tomorrow as well.

This is one of those "What doesn't kill you makes you stronger" things, right?

I am really happy for you and that therapy has worked!!! I hope that everything goes well for you today, and am thinking of you and your continued progression of honoring your therapy! ( something for me to keep in mind, definitely!)

PButton, this just makes me grin from ear to ear. I'm so happy that you realized that and that you can keep him in mind. I wish you a peaceful final session, reviewing what you've accomplished and how you feel about one another. It can be an amazing experience.