Or want to record them?

If so, do you find it is helpful? In what way?

Edit: I mean recorded by you, because you want to, not recorded by your T.

No, I would find it really uncomfortable. I don't think I could be completely "myself" knowing I was being recorded. That is a throwback to being a musician and recording being about doing your "best" performance on tape. I also absolutely hate hearing my voice on tape.

Originally Posted by TentativeConnection

Or want to record them?

If so, do you find it is helpful? In what way?

No, I have never really given it much thought.

Once I did ask a T if my session was being recorded. He had something on the table next to him that resembled a voice recorder. He was curious why I asked and then showed me it was his cell phone.

[harvest moon]

Originally Posted by TentativeConnection

Or want to record them?

If so, do you find it is helpful? In what way?

Edit: I mean recorded by you, because you want to, not recorded by your T.

There have been many times that I've wished I had recorded my sessions since my first. It would definitely be hard to listen to them, but I would like to listen again to the way I used to think when I first started back in 2009. Plus, I sometime I find it hard to remember his words, and often wish I could replay them when I need to hear them.

[Miswimmy1]

I wish I could because sometimes I just want to hear my t saying it will all be ok. And then I wouldn't have to bug her with the same needy questions all the time

I'm with Chris. If I knew it was being recorded I'd be all nervous and fakey-fake and nothing would get accomplished at all. That being said, I DO sometimes wish I had playback capability for what T has said!!

I would like to edit everything I said out and then record everything t said so her voice nuke soothe me whom I get. Down

[autotelica]

I kind of wish I had a recording so that I can get a reminder of how I am when I'm depressed.

[stopdog]

I have done so to prove she did or did not do something she insisted and to show I had. In other words, to prove, if only to myself, that I was right.

[BlessedRhiannon]

Originally Posted by TentativeConnection

Or want to record them?

If so, do you find it is helpful? In what way?

Edit: I mean recorded by you, because you want to, not recorded by your T.

Yes, I record some of them. I record on my phone, then playback later and decide whether or not to keep them. I currently only have 3 sessions saved on my phone - my first session with the p-doc (which was last week), and two sessions with my T, where she gave me a lot of information that I wanted to be able to review later.

I find it helpful, because there are times when I am so anxious that I dissociate and I can't take in what my T is saying. I can hear the words, but don't always process them. Recording lets me replay those sessions and actually process what is being said rather than just the overwhelming feelings I was having. Also, if it's a session where I'm getting a lot of information (like the one where she reviewed my assessment results with me), it's helpful to record so I can review what she's told me.

Usually, I will transcribe the important parts of a session in to my journal and then delete the recording.

[doyoutrustme]

I did once. I found that I forgot I was taping and the playback was really helpful.

Originally Posted by BlessedRhiannon

Yes, I record some of them. I record on my phone, then playback later and decide whether or not to keep them. I currently only have 3 sessions saved on my phone - my first session with the p-doc (which was last week), and two sessions with my T, where she gave me a lot of information that I wanted to be able to review later.

I find it helpful, because there are times when I am so anxious that I dissociate and I can't take in what my T is saying. I can hear the words, but don't always process them. Recording lets me replay those sessions and actually process what is being said rather than just the overwhelming feelings I was having. Also, if it's a session where I'm getting a lot of information (like the one where she reviewed my assessment results with me), it's helpful to record so I can review what she's told me.

Usually, I will transcribe the important parts of a session in to my journal and then delete the recording.

do they know you are recording?

[autotelica]

I'm wondering if I should record my sessions with my new pdoc. I'm guess I just want everything to work out with this guy so much, and I don't want to risk screwing stuff up because I forgot/misinterpreted him.

[BlessedRhiannon]

Originally Posted by TentativeConnection

do they know you are recording?

No. I suppose I probably should ask, but I want to record the honest conversation, with no censoring on anyone's behalf. I don't censor myself when I'm recording. If I were using the recordings for any purpose other than just to remind myself of what happened, I would probably ask permission. However, I really only use them to review what was said, take notes, and then delete. When I'm paying attention, I have a very good memory and could just as easily go back to my car after a session and write down, word for word, what was said. Recordings are for when I am really struggling to take it all in.

[amandalouise]

Originally Posted by TentativeConnection

Or want to record them?

If so, do you find it is helpful? In what way?

Edit: I mean recorded by you, because you want to, not recorded by your T.

yes my therapy sessions are video and audio recorded both because I want them to be and because my therapist likes to record sessions.

it benefits me because I dont always remember everything we go over in therapy. plus its very easy in the heat of the moment to think I heard one thing and it turned out my therapist has said or suggested or meant something completely different. by having the sessions fully recorded both my therapist and I can look back on our sessions on our own time (not in the therapy sessions)

on my therapists end she works with dissociatives among other types of mental disorders. by recording the sessions she does not have to stop and say "hold on let me write this down." she can deal with the problem at hand and still have a complete record for herself, me or her other clients.

[healed84]

I have thought about it many time, but I have never recored it. I think sometimes it would be a good idea to have, and others.. I probably don't want to hear that session.

[lostmyway21]

I do the same thing BR does. I record certain sessions on my cell phone I think I may need to. Especially sessions after a crisis where I know I will need to hear what he says and not twist all the words around after. Also if I intend to discuss something hard I will. If it turns out to be a pointless session I delete it... otherwise it stays on my iPhone. Either way its helped me many many times. Does he know? Nope. I only have about six saved.

He actually gave me the idea though one session, when we argued about how I can't remember what we talk about correctly...he said that I should record the sessions. I just never told him I had after. I have the same reasoning, about not telling him, I don't want it to be censored. I want it to be an honest, normal therapy session.

Five minutes after I get out of session I'm twisted and distorting his words and putting all kind of negative filters on everything he just told me. That's why it became such a helpful tool for me. I have a really bad memory and this is what has helped me keep what he tells me in session in context.

[CantExplain]

I don't think my T would like this!

I can imagine her saying, "You're only doing this so you can quote me out of context and convince yourself I'm a bad therapist."

That made me smile, CE - both because I imagine you (and she) are right, but because I imagine my T would not like it for the opposite reason. I would use such a recording to beat myself up about what I said that was stupid, what I failed to say, and how stupid my accent sounded. And I do believe in the observer's paradox, that when you record natural speech the act of recording renders the speech unnatural. I would feel even more awkward if my words were in fact recorded. Plus, for me the fact that speech is ephemeral isin itself important.

It would be nice to have a recording of some of the strengthening things T has said. But not worth all the drawbacks.

I think anything not centered around rupture would be helpful. comforting, even, when I am upset, to hear T's voice.

Even when I am mad at her.

But I also agree that asking T about recording might make the conversation censored which then would be no point in recording it.

Originally Posted by Apteryx

That made me smile, CE - both because I imagine you (and she) are right, but because I imagine my T would not like it for the opposite reason. I would use such a recording to beat myself up about what I said that was stupid, what I failed to say, and how stupid my accent sounded. And I do believe in the observer's paradox, that when you record natural speech the act of recording renders the speech unnatural. I would feel even more awkward if my words were in fact recorded. Plus, for me the fact that speech is ephemeral isin itself important.

It would be nice to have a recording of some of the strengthening things T has said. But not worth all the drawbacks.

[Eliza Jane]

Originally Posted by TentativeConnection

But I also agree that asking T about recording might make the conversation censored which then would be no point in recording it.

I would think that not only would T's part of the conversation be altered by recording, your end might change too (and there is really no way to record without either of you knowing!)

I think that secretly recording has the huge possibility of blowing up on you. I think if T finds out, it is likely to end in an ugly rupture that may or may not be possible to repair. Whether it is right or wrong, I could see a T terminating a client for this. For example, they might become paranoid that you are trying to gather evidence to sue them. Maybe it is theoretically possible to hide it from them, but don't you think you might be tempted to say, "When I was listening to the tape of our session..." Or call them out on something they said that was contradictory and show them the evidence that you were right? I know I would be tempted.

If you want to gain more "factual" stuff from the taping, maybe note-taking would be a better option. If you want her voice, maybe you could just ask her to send you a positive voice mail that you could save.

Best,
EJ

[lostmyway21]

When I do it I totally forget I'm doing it and I'm complelty normal. If my T ever found out he would have enough brains to know as to why I was doing it. I have enough cognitive distortions, it makes it almost impossible to remember what happens in sessions correctly. I lose out of everything he is trying to help me understand because of my negative filters. He would understand. I can't note take the entire session, and note taking loses context, and meanings.

The recordings have taught me where I placed a negative filters where I shouldn't have. Where I showed resistance, pushed him away, made mistakes, missed points he was trying to make, forgot to say things...truly very helpful.

[BlessedRhiannon]

Originally Posted by lostmyway21

When I do it I totally forget I'm doing it and I'm complelty normal. If my T ever found out he would have enough brains to know as to why I was doing it. I have enough cognitive distortions, it makes it almost impossible to remember what happens in sessions correctly. I lose out of everything he is trying to help me understand because of my negative filters. He would understand. I can't note take the entire session, and note taking loses context, and meanings.

Same here. I set my phone to record while I'm in the waiting room, and then I don't think about it again until after my appointment is over.

If my T ever found out I was recording, I think our relationship is strong enough that she would ask me to explain my need for the recordings, and would understand my reasoning.

I started doing it after several sessions where I totally distorted what T said. It was helpful for me to go back and listen to the conversation later and hear what she was actually saying, rather than what I heard during session. I still bring these things up with T, so that we can talk about the distortions.

[stopdog]

It has helped me to be reassured I remembered things correctly and the therapist was the one who forgot, lied or was not paying attention in the first place.

[attached]

I record my sessions with the permission of my T. We decided it might help because I often distorted things he said or forgot things when I was under a lot of stress. It was weird at first to hear myself but I have gotten used to it. I forget I'm recording so I don't think it effects what I talk about and I assume that it doesn't effect T because he agreed to it. He also told me he had recorded some of his own therapy sessions.