[Ganymede00]

I'm feeling dumb. I always seem to feel this way whenever I start seeing a therapist, though I've never seen someone for more than a few sessions. I start feeling self conscious and foolish, that maybe it's all in my head, or worse, that maybe I'm really not off as bad as I keep thinking, like my problems aren't as bad as other people's. I hate that I start putting up my walls and begin lying to myself. Ugh, why is this so hard?

Backstory: the psychologist I wanted to see finally called and I'm going to see her in person to discuss my situation and whether we are a good fit.

Btw, I just wanna thanks to all the people who have offered advice and comforting words over the last 2 years. I yearn for the day where I can offer any wisdom to others on here. I always come here whenever things get bad but I always feel guilty for not providing others with feedback. So thanks to everyone. Truly.

[sconnie892]

I was very anxious when I started therapy and I often referred to myself as stupid in sessions. T and I have worked a long time on not referring to myself as stupid.

I avoided therapy for a decade or more - partially because I thought I had noting to complain about and surely there were other people who had bigger problems than me. But now I see the best thing about therapy is that those other people don't exist when I am in t's office. For those 50 minutes my problems are the most important thing. It's okay to work on me. It took me a long time to accept that concept.

I hope you have a good meeting with the psychologist.

[pbutton]

Originally Posted by Ganymede00

I'm feeling dumb. I always seem to feel this way whenever I start seeing a therapist, though I've never seen someone for more than a few sessions. I start feeling self conscious and foolish, that maybe it's all in my head, or worse, that maybe I'm really not off as bad as I keep thinking, like my problems aren't as bad as other people's. I hate that I start putting up my walls and begin lying to myself. Ugh, why is this so hard?

I could have written the exact same thing. In fact I bet I have nearly the exact same thing written in some post in the past.

The things that kept me going:

• My T seemed to think I did actually need therapy. He is better trained in this stuff and I'm probably not sneaky enough to fool him.
• I decided that thinking that I needed therapy even when I didn't need therapy was a therapy-worthy issue, in and of itself.

[CantExplain]

Starting therapy is always anxious and difficult.
And so is going on with therapy.
And so is ending therapy.

Therapy is not easy.

[ECHOES]

Originally Posted by Ganymede00

I'm feeling dumb. I always seem to feel this way whenever I start seeing a therapist, though I've never seen someone for more than a few sessions. I start feeling self conscious and foolish, that maybe it's all in my head, or worse, that maybe I'm really not off as bad as I keep thinking, like my problems aren't as bad as other people's. I hate that I start putting up my walls and begin lying to myself. Ugh, why is this so hard?

Backstory: the psychologist I wanted to see finally called and I'm going to see her in person to discuss my situation and whether we are a good fit.

Btw, I just wanna thanks to all the people who have offered advice and comforting words over the last 2 years. I yearn for the day where I can offer any wisdom to others on here. I always come here whenever things get bad but I always feel guilty for not providing others with feedback. So thanks to everyone. Truly.

It's a normal defense against being vulnerable. It's protective and very understandable.

I feel dumb still, or rather, that is my worry - that I will be perceived as dumb. I also have struggled with feelings about whether I "should be" in therapy, as if I didn't deserve to be there.

Therapy is about learning more about yourself and, depending on the kind of therapy (since some are solution-focused and short-term), anyone can benefit from understanding themselves better. It makes life feel much better, and improves our relationships with others.

Hang in there!

[Solepa]

I think many people feel very similar when starting a therapy. Well I definitely do.
Like I´m stupid for needing help, my problems are not big enough, the T is waisting her time with me because she could be helping people with "real" problems. She surely has to laught at me under her understanding mask face. And that I´m overdramatic and so on.....I nearly quit after the 4th session because of these feelings. What made me change my mind:
The thought of my future children and the baggage I may pass on to them
the thought of my fiance who deserves better and also my T saing I deserve it too.

So I wish you the best and I hope soon you will also feel you deserve it.