Reaction to seeing T's next client

Freewilled, I had a similar kind of reaction when I saw a couple with their baby in the waiting room before my session. They were still there because the mother was trying to nurse her baby, very modestly, I might add. She had her coat over her and I guessed what she was doing only because of the baby stroller in the room.

Then the mother, in a soothing voice, was talking to her baby, and "showing" her the paintings and photos in the waiting room, and mentioning my T's name. I could tell she felt good about "our" T! She was talking softly but I was right there so I heard her. It was weird but strangely comforting to know that someone else felt the same way I do about my T. I had expected to feel jealous, but I didn't.

I've only seen a few clients in the waiting room in the 3 plus years I've been seeing my T. Once I did get jealous because she gave this guy her big smile and said "I like your haircut!!" I asked her at my next session if she could wait until I was out the door before she started talking to her next client. She thanked me for pointing that out to her.

Rainbow ~ Yes! It is also partly what you said about feeling like someone else appreciates my T and that he is "our" T I have a confession to make though: I also think I was happy that he was seeing someone after me because I feel guilty meeting with him so late into the evening....yeah, I know it's his job and his choice and all, but it makes me feel like he'd rather be somewhere else. So selfishly, it's like he can be mad at that client and not me

Who knew that seeing a client in the lobby could cause so many different and mixed reactions/feelings!

I've seen maybe a handful of my therapist other clients before/after sessions. It's never bothered me. I've referred friends, ex friends, and random people I've met. I remember one person kept saying she wanted her family to see my therapist, and I talk to my therapist, about feeling jealousy toward the adolescent daughter if she took them on. My therapist assured me, if this family saw her, it would not effect how she feels about me, and how she does my therapy. I had to trust her. I've been with my therapist for 14 months, and the other family 9 months. And absolutely, no problems have arisen, even when the friendship broke up4 months ago.

I think I would feel happy if I saw a child in the waiting room as I wish I had gotten therapy as a kid and not had to wait until now.

Could be wrong, though!

I felt insanely jealous/bad about myself a few months ago when I found out another girl in program was seeing my T because I felt like this other girl was so much prettier, sucessful, and easier to deal with than I was. It was such a horrible feeling.

Lucky me, diff. appt day for new T and different client in the waiting room when I walked out and he ushered her and her iPhone she seemed glued to inside ...

I am SO appreciating past Ts who had 10 minutes in between clients and/or let me walk out through the waiting room by myself. That way if people were waiting I never knew which client belonged to which T, as my T was always part of a multi-T office.

Today I felt like I was part of a factory, and it was nothing he did, exactly. But I seriously almost said "YOUR TURN" to the girl...since this is the new T and the first time I didn't like seeing his next patient. And there was nothing in particular that caught my attention about her, so I had no "real" reason to react like this. Great. I have no interest in having this discussion with him...it's too early for this. Argh.

I always tell myself they must be a drug or sales rep. Cuz like at the gp's office, you can always tell who the drug reps are, right? I did read "in your program" - but hey, being delusional should work in our favor sometimes, no??!

I've never seen T's other clients (so far) as she doesn't have many; as she's partly retired.

However, I have seen her family arriving at her house after a session.

I just had a conversation with my T about this yesterday!

A couple of months ago, I told her it made me feel really weird and jealous and upset whenever her next client got mentioned on the phone. That's because she works in a sort of group clinic, so the receptionist will phone during our session to alert her of the next client's arrival. She keeps the calls to a bare minimum of "Ok thanks, I'll pick him up downstairs in 10 minutes," but the personal pronoun is already too much for me! She was super nice about it and now doesn't mention their gender anymore on the phone, haha. This way, when I walk past 3 people in the waiting room on the way out, I can just fool myself that none of them are waiting for my T

Yesterday, though, her previous client's session went over the time limit a bit, so I saw how my T showed the other client to the door (it was a middle aged woman). They were laughing and joking, and the woman even came back to hand the mail to the receptionist! Gahhhh I felt horrible - I instantly started judging and comparing myself: that I would never dare pick up the mail, that I'm probably a way less fun client, way weirder, needier, more work, etc etc. That my T probably looks forward immensely to meeting with this woman, and then sighs and braces herself for every appointment with me...

I ended up bursting into tears as soon as our session started, and telling her all of this. She reacted in a lovely, caring way! Instead of picking one of us as the "more beloved" client, she told me it wasn't weird or sick at all to want to be your T's only (or most special) client. She said that almost every one of her clients had expressed similar feelings, and that many of them entertain similar illusions / hopes / fears about this issue.
Best of all, she said SHE had the same thing with her mentor and team supervisor! Like thinking (hoping) that if he said something to her, he would only mention it to her

So: it's not just us! Even our T's can feel this way....

ItsTheTaste, I'm glad you were able to talk to your T and the answer was so reassuring.

There were a couple new girls in our group and yesterday my therapist pulled one of them out, meaning she will be her therapist and I have never felt so jealous in my life. I get so posessive over my T, especially after being used to me being her only client in our group.

I couldn't handle being in a group run by my T. No way. He's mine, damnit.

I've never seen another of my T's clients. It's not necessary to walk out through waiting room at end of session. There is a separate exit door which is nice.

BUT, I got kinda enraged when the client after me turned on light that he/she had arrived. See, in waiting room there is a light switched that we flip to alert our T that we've arrived.

I get so hopping mad when the next person flips the switch when I'm in session. T leaves 10 minutes between clients and to me it's exceedingly rude to turn on light when I'm still in session. The light bulb is over the door and it's behind T so I see it come on.

So, if I am so affected by seeing the light turn on, I wonder how I'd react seeing another client in person. Not well, I imagine.

I drive by my T's office daily because it's on the way from my house into town. I see her car parked and I am faced with the reality that yes, indeed, she has other clients. I try not to take it personally. I convince myself that she likes me the best. (Gawd, how some of us need our T's to favor only us)

Last week,I was actually early to see my T (for once)and sitting in the waiting room I could hear my T and her client before me through the walls (muffled,but I could) kind of horrified me,but I've never seen anyone there when I got out. Another lady a little older than I was walked out with my T,I didn't even look at her face,just kept my face glued to my iphone because I knew I'd become instantly jealous and fixated on her, because she had MY T. Damn it I know I share her but I'd never seen her with another client and I didn't want to start...maybe I'll start coming late again...lol

I never usually see my t's other clients. But I remember one time, there was one, and she was pretty and I would have liked to say hi, if the jealousy that reared up wasn't so bad. I couldn't even make eye contact. I think it's normal to feel possesive of our therapists. We forget that they have other clients too. The important thing is that for the 50min, they are *ours*.

Funny enough, it doesn't bother me to see my T's next client. It is always the same woman, sort of quiet. I always smile or say "hey" to her...totally weird because with my jealousy/abandonment issues it surprises me that I am okay with that! My issues are pretty much directed to my T. She gets the brunt of it!! That is a whole different thread...

I saw ts next client once, he was about twenty and all dressed up with aftershave all over him. Me and t were walking out and he was right outside the door . She said oh, your early. She let him in and went to make a cup of tea. I was jealous because I know he was all done up like a dogs dinner to meet t.
I know t is straight so she would look at him differently. It made me sad .

My T works from her private practise at home. Before her I was seeing a 'counsellor' in a clinic setting. Now having experience of both I can say I'd never touch clinic setting 'therapy' with a barge pole. It's like being in a cattle market.

My T is kind of halfway between as he has a private practice but in a small therapy centre he runs.