[PrisonBound]

Hello Everyone...

I know....no stupid questions, right? I'll keep it short and if you need more info I'm happy to fill you in...

I'm new here and I'm new to therapy. So far my therapist has been great. Today, she was great. However, during our session she had her legs crossed and I noticed wiggling her foot up and down rapidly, as if I was boring her....You know, we've all done it.

I almost said something, but blew it off as me being silly, but it's bothering me! lol

Thoughts? Should I say something? I'm annoyed honestly, maybe hurt, idk. Just looking for the insight I dont have right now.

Thanks everyone for listening

I cross my legs a lot and bounce my foot up and down. Sometimes it means I'm kind of excited to see the other person. Sometimes it means I am passionate about the topic we are discussing. Sometimes, I have not had a chance to exercise the day before and it's nervous energy. Almost never is it because I'm bored.

[Yoda]

Maybe she needed to pee but didn't want to interrupt the session

[Miswimmy1]

I had a therapist who did that. I didn't mention anything and it was later disclosed that she has ADHD. So I wouldn't immediately jump to the conclusion that she was bored... If its really bothering u, casually bring it up

[jan16th]

It is not by any means a silly question. You should casually bring it up the next time you meet and tell her how it affected you. It could be a very interesting talk about non-verbal messages we all send out , and how they can sometimes be misinterepreted . Good Luck.

[tinyrabbit]

This is totally not a silly question. Body language is just as important as the words we say, perhaps even more so.

Do tell your therapist what you observed and how you felt, and ask what was behind it. But don't assume you can work that out accurately without asking - I very much doubt she was bored.

I think it's really great that you posted this question and are thinking about it and what it might mean rather than just stewing on it.

Btw, she might just have had cramp. Or maybe she thought of something she wanted to say but canned it as you were talking and her foot gave away her eagerness to speak.

[PrisonBound]

Thanks for the replies everyone.

I guess my biggest concern would be whether or not bring it up at all with her. I was worried I was over reacting or perhaps somehow trying to manipulate the situation by asking her about it. I have borderline traits, and I know I have done these things in the past, but it truly bothered me.

Then again, maybe she just had to pee

I left the session feeling murky and muddled, and not "settled" if that makes any sense. Thanks for the input and taking the time to help everyone. Very much appreciated

[Perna]

She could have had too much coffee, had to pee, etc. My T refused to do much with body language, explaining that spoken was hard enough!

[pbutton]

I sit like that often. It doesn't indicate that I am bored. I'd definitely bring this up with your T.

[FeelTheBurn]

SO not a silly question...those can be important questions to ask, because they are relatively simple paths to little bits of self-discovery that can add up to a lot of healing.

Funny how the answers to the questions we have so often come back to, "ask your therapist about it." Therapist yawns in session; is she bored by me? Ask her. He was short with me on the phone; is he angry with me? Ask him. She said something that hurt me and made me feel she doesn't understand me at all; she's a duplicitous phony! Hmm, might wanna run that by her and see what happens.

I'm a total mess, but I am learning that one main purpose of therapy, for me, is to use every bad feeling and assumption that comes up in therapy as fodder for learning about myself. Unless I can bring myself to confront these things with the one person who is paid and trained to hold my best interests and healing as paramount, then therapy is really just a waste of time and money.

The corollary to that, of course, is what your therapist does with that sort of "confrontation." If her response is to be anything other than compassionate and open, encouraging you to join her in being curious about yourself in relation to her and your perceptions of her, then hit the door and find another therapist. Life is also too short to waste time and money with someone who can't be trusted with the basic requirements of the therapeutic alliance.

[PrisonBound]

I will ask her about it. I know it's important ...I have no doubt I'll learn something about myself from it. The fact that I'm even questioning it is honestly, surprising to me.

Again, I'm a total mess myself, and new at therapy, and I genuinely appreciate all of the responses. Thanks all...

[tinyrabbit]

I think your T will be pleased that you're asking rather than just jumping to conclusions.

[WikidPissah]

I jiggle my foot as well, and never because I am bored. It's usually because of too much caffeine.

[tinyrabbit]

I have poor circulation in my left foot and the toes go a bit numb so I tend to jiggle it, come to think of it.