Interrupting/not listening to T

eskielover · Jun 20, 2013, 09:11 AM

It does make it more difficult do communicate without the eye contact & & observing body language to be more in touch with the other person.

I find that I do that more in group situations...like in my Bible study groups or in the DBT group I was in. One on one comunication is much easier to handle....lol....sometimes we go back & forth...you say what you were going to say...no you...lol......but in groups, that's when I struggle the most with trying to get my thought out there & heard. Had one lady in my DBT group that I always seemed to be doing that to.....& I caught myself doing that & finally was able to catch myself before actually saying anything when I realized this was happening.

Most times I always try to wait for a lull in the conversation in groups before saying something....but then sometimes I end up going back to the previous subject if I didn't get a chance to say what I thought was important.....the art of conversation isn't easy that's for sure.

mandazzle · Jun 20, 2013, 10:01 AM

I interrupt my T and I hate it! I always feel so guilty for doing it, especially because every time I stop and apologize she always lets me talk.

almostthere · Jun 20, 2013, 10:14 AM

I've read your thread.

I would like to make a suggestion if I may...

Before u go to your next T session concentrate on stopping your habit of interrupting her when she is talking. In other words I'm saying to catch yourself before it happens. Obviously there is something going on in your subconscience mind that tends to control your behavior without u being aware it's happening. Control your mind and then u can control your behavior. Use the power of your mind to recognize and identify what triggers u to behave that way. It takes practice but it's not impossible and when u learn to do this your life will be so much better and u will reap the benefits.

Good luck and thank u for sharing...

"almostthere"

Quote:

Originally Posted by rainbow8

I tend to interrupt my T and not listen to her. I do that in RL too. Today she commented about it and told me that it seems like I don't want to hear what she has to say. That made me feel bad because I DO want to hear her.

I'm not aware of my behavior while it's happening. I just feel like I have to keep telling her things and I don't notice when she starts to talk! I want to change this bad habit!

I think I do it because of anxiety. My H tells me all the time to stop talking and listen. All my Ts have mentioned it but no one told me how to stop doing it. One friend says that I never let her finish a sentence.

When I was a child and teenager I was very shy and didn't interrupt people. Maybe I'm making up for all the talking I didn't do.

I don't do it to be selfish. I think next session I'll ask my T to stop me all the times I interrupt her because, like I said, I don't know I do it. Like saying "you know", or "like", or "um".

I think women interrupt more than men. I don't think I'm so unusual, but for my T to comment on it sort of makes me feel weird. Yet, I'm glad she feels that I'm secure enough to withstand being criticized.

I just wondered if others have this problem in therapy and what they do about it.

LadyShadow · Jun 20, 2013, 10:28 AM

Thanks to everyone on this thread for sharing and giving such awesome advice

My ex-boyfriend tells me I interrupt him all the time. he says everyone just does it to him though. Its like people have the need to talk over him. I do it a lot to him and don't realize I do it. I make a conscious effort not to do it.

My T doesn't mind he lets me interrupt. so I don't really notice it. I really like this thread and I will try to implement some of it in my daily life.

Thanks!

poptartscherry · 10:37 AM

I REALLY understand. First thought is your medication. But I used to take more medication so I would be calm & listen to my T. Someone recently told me to write things down & it has helped me. I'm so glad you have a T and you must she must believe you are strong enough to take the criticism. My son has taught me to listen to him much better. He said unless a Zombie is coming through the front door or a natural disaster be quiet; let him finish. But I do beat myself up and feel so guilty. I was like this since I was in the second grade. Can remember clearly answering a question when we were taking an oral test. Anyway, hang in there. Hope this helps a little. What is the disorder you have listed as DY...?

Does this happen just sometimes?

Quote:

Originally Posted by rainbow8

I tend to interrupt my T and not listen to her. I do that in RL too. Today she commented about it and told me that it seems like I don't want to hear what she has to say. That made me feel bad because I DO want to hear her.

I'm not aware of my behavior while it's happening. I just feel like I have to keep telling her things and I don't notice when she starts to talk! I want to change this bad habit!

I think I do it because of anxiety. My H tells me all the time to stop talking and listen. All my Ts have mentioned it but no one told me how to stop doing it. One friend says that I never let her finish a sentence.

When I was a child and teenager I was very shy and didn't interrupt people. Maybe I'm making up for all the talking I didn't do.

I don't do it to be selfish. I think next session I'll ask my T to stop me all the times I interrupt her because, like I said, I don't know I do it. Like saying "you know", or "like", or "um".

I think women interrupt more than men. I don't think I'm so unusual, but for my T to comment on it sort of makes me feel weird. Yet, I'm glad she feels that I'm secure enough to withstand being criticized.

I just wondered if others have this problem in therapy and what they do about it.

unaluna · Jun 20, 2013, 10:37 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by poptartscherry

I REALLY understand... My son has taught me to listen to him much better. He said unless a Zombie is coming through the front door or a natural disaster be quiet; let him finish.

This is great!!!

Perna · Jun 20, 2013, 11:03 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by rainbow8

I tend to interrupt my T and not listen to her. I do that in RL too. Today she commented about it and told me that it seems like I don't want to hear what she has to say.

I would get curious and see if I could tell when in her speaking I had the urge to interrupt, what the trigger is? I know when I read sometimes, I'll suddenly find myself in front of the refrigerator

and when I backtrack I find there was a scary thought that was the impetus to suddenly be looking for something to eat. At one point, I actually put a book in my refrigerator to remind me what was going on.

I'd bring some item to therapy with me to hold, something unusual that makes me think about interrupting (condom? :-) or talking or an exchange (picture of a stoplight? stop sign?) and see if I could focus on my speaking, T speaking, my speaking, etc. and when that was hard and either T or I caught me interrupting, I'd instantly drop the interrupting and look at what was just said and how I felt about it, why I was trying to stop it.

Jun 20, 2013, 01:20 PM

Partial hijack, I am CRACKING UP picturing my T's face if I walked into therapy holding a condom.

Good thing my new office has a door because I was actually laughing out loud about it.

granite1 · Jun 20, 2013, 01:51 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by My kids are cool

Partial hijack, I am CRACKING UP picturing my T's face if I walked into therapy holding a condom.

Good thing my new office has a door because I was actually laughing out loud about it.

ya but i hear he is kind of a good looking guy

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