[Wren_]

how many times do you write something in here about therapy or your therapist ready to post and then close it down (delete it) before you do

because maybe it should be something you keep to your therapy sessions
or because you worry about responses
or it is just too scary

I just wrote the same thing out about six times and couldn't post any attempt ... keep coming back in this instance to that I should share it with T first ... but then will I?

[BlessedRhiannon]

All the freakin' time. And, I type emails to T all the time and never post them either. Sometimes, posting here first gives me the courage to share with T.

[Wren_]

I lost track a long time ago of all the started emails to t that never got sent! glad you reminded me I do it there as well

[granite1]

same here tiger all the time .I think you can risk it if you want and post it. maybe we can help in supporting you being able to share it with your T. I know that a lot of people here use to help me be able to share things with my T

[CantExplain]

I have edited some posts many, many times. And then I've deleted them.

[tealBumblebee]

Wow. I literally just did this. Just typed a half page and got so frustrated with what I was writing that I just closed it. Ugh. I'm with you.

Then I came on here as distraction haha. You're not alone - i've done it to. And it SUCKS.

[Wren_]

thanks granite ... this particular post I was trying to write earlier was more just wanting insight on something; then wondering if it would be better addressed with my T; then wondering if i would even do that ... anxiety getting in the way at every turn it seems i'm really glad sharing here has helped you with sharing in T

thanks for sharing your experiences rhi, granite and cantexplain

teal, do you think you will try writing and sharing your post again or leave it now?

[pbutton]

I often get sick of myself or sick of writing and abandon my efforts.

[tealBumblebee]

Originally Posted by tigergirl

teal, do you think you will try writing and sharing your post again or leave it now?

I'm going to just leave it alone.

[sweepy62]

Sometimes depending on the topic , it helps me to process it here first.

Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[growlycat]

You can ask here AND talk to T about it.

[rainbow8]

I have the opposite problem! I post on PC without editing or deleting, which is probably why some of my threads are too personal and controversial, or I end up feeling hurt. When I was younger, I used to rewrite letters because I was so much of a perfectionist. I find it freeing to be honest and open here where no one (I hope) knows me in RL.

If I post on here, I usually end up telling my T about it. I know it's a risk and it's hard, but what do you have to lose? Most of us are very understanding and nonjudgmental because we have issues of our own. I wish that everyone would post with that in mind but I know it's still hard to take the risk.

I tell my T everything and that feels freeing too.

What exactly are you afraid of, tigergirl? Of being judged and criticized, or of being embarrassed?

[growlycat]

I usually post here before trying out ideas w/T's

[Wren_]

I have the opposite problem! I post on PC without editing or deleting, which is probably why some of my threads are too personal and controversial, or I end up feeling hurt. When I was younger, I used to rewrite letters because I was so much of a perfectionist. I find it freeing to be honest and open here where no one (I hope) knows me in RL.

If I post on here, I usually end up telling my T about it. I know it's a risk and it's hard, but what do you have to lose? Most of us are very understanding and nonjudgmental because we have issues of our own. I wish that everyone would post with that in mind but I know it's still hard to take the risk.

I tell my T everything and that feels freeing too.

What exactly are you afraid of, tigergirl? Of being judged and criticized, or of being embarrassed?

hi rain - the afraid of/scary ... i actually meant because the subject matter can be very triggery and sensitive and i find it hard to post about when it's things like connected with CSA, other abuse, SI and sui thoughts at times

with the sometimes deciding it is better to share things with my T first; some of it has to do with the style of therapy we do which is very much about the dynamics of the T relationship and that relationship itself is helping me with healing. Sometimes - If i write something here and others respond before I share it with my T, I find that I'm usually going in to the therapy session with those responses in mind and have a preconceived idea of how he will react ... and even assume his reaction at times before he has had a chance to give it which doesn't always work so well

with my old CBT therapist it wouldn't have mattered so much because the therapy was more about what was going on with me and changing thoughts; so he wanted me to find out things from others as well

so I end up wanting input on one hand, and also knowing it can impact my therapy sessions on the other hence part of the push and pull of posting and editing

You can ask here AND talk to T about it.

thanks growly