What i wish i knew before starting therapy

I like what you wrote, growly, especially the last point.

That getting stuck really sucks and moving anywhere but backwards probably will take 100 times more work than I bargained for /:

I wish I knew to keep my mouth shut and never to have gone for therapy. It 's not a safe place.

That I would get attached to my T and already knowing things about T make it SO MUCH WORSE. Truly dealing with my feelings hurts like heck.

That the name of the game was shame.
That my therapist is a trained liar.
That I would my faith, family, friends.
That i would lose the ability to see my daughter everyday. (6 days a month).
That not one person would ever care about what I went through as a child.
That not one person would ever comfort me for having been starved, beaten, tortured,raped, and mutilated before I was 10 years old.
That trust is a lie.
That hope is a mind drug.
That I would discover that I've never been loved and never will.
That hell is just a place where God hides his mistakes .
That hell is a place where therapists hide their patients.
That therapists are secret sadists who amuse themselves with the pain of their patients.
That there is no such thing as confidentiality.
That I would hate women.
That I would hate me.
That therapists use therapy to keep their patients in therapy.
That I will never hope for a consolation for my pain again.
That by telling my therapist how I was abused, would show her how to hurt me.
That fire is more tolerable than the shame I found in therapy.

That it would've been better to have never been born.

That it really does get worse before it gets better
That there is so much about myself I did not know
That it would be bloody hard!
That the things I least wnat to tlak about are often the most important
That it would be bloody hard!

"Should" is the worse swear word ever invented.
Even you'll feel vulnerable and lost for words
Things you felt were resolved are not
The therapist holds your life in their hands, literally, find a trustworthy one.
It won't help if it's forced.
You wont be locked up forever for your thoughts and feelings, just medicated, at times heavily medicated.
Your 'hard-lines' topics will blur and maybe its a good.

Husband:
I wish I knew that it wouldn't save me from me.

Son:
Don't worry, they just talk to you
If you don't like them you can hire a new one.

1a) Therapy is a rabbit hole you aint ever getting out of. DISAGREE
1b) The more you learn the more you want to know. AGREE

2) Not all therapists are created equal, some are really good but a lot of them just suck. AGREE But it's more complicated than that, because some good therapists suck, eg Madame T.

3a) A therapists qualifications are not indicative of how good they'll be. AGREE
3b) A lot comes down to aptitude for the job. AGREE
3c) Ask lots of questions when interviewing a therapist before you trust them with your heart. AGREE But love has its own rules.

That therapy can be a lot of work.

That everything has meaning in that room.

It takes a lot of guts to examine yourself and your own behavior.

that i would become so attached to her...ugh!

I'm sorry, NTLF. It shouldnt ever happen to anyone,. Ever.

How little accountability therapists have and how they have no real way for a client to measure whether therapy is working or not.

That despite their psychobabble, framed diplomas, multiple accreditations, etc...they are not paragons of mental health, quite the contrary. Only we discover that detail much later....

I wish that I knew that the pain would intensify as we progressed...
I wish that I knew how attached I would be to my T...
I wish that I knew that this was going to take a very long time before we see the light at the end of the tunnel

1) That I would develop a very deep and close relationship with the therapist. I like it, but I wish I had known that could be part of the deal!

2) That therapy could help. I wish I had known this many years ago and I would have done therapy in my younger years and saved myself a lot of grief and bad situations and poor choices.

I was just about to write exactly the same thing. I wish I had known how much therapy would help me because I would have started sooner. I would love to get back those years.

I'm in my 30's and in a real rush to get therapy "DONE" i don't want to waste anymore time on this stuff than i have to. I want to get on with living and being happy and productive and free from the stuff that weighs me down.

I wish I had known how painful it would be to be seen, to be treated as someone of value, because of the stark contrast with the past.

I wish I knew it would end so horribly so I wouldn't put myself through it.

It will take over your life.
The outcome are hard to measure.
You'll mourn leaving after years as its like losing a friend.

I wish I had known that it's normal to act out all your dysfunction and disconnects are part of the process. I'm always trying to build this good, solid relationship with T, and then all my "stuff" comes out. I always thought I was doing it wrong because of this... but now I know that is actually the process. Your "stuff" is supposed to come out and that's how it gets worked through.

i wish i'd known about the whole T-client fit a lot sooner. if i had i would not have seen the first 2 Ts i did.
i wish i'd known to talk more about where i am and what my feelings are rather than talking about what i thought i should be doing.
i wish i'd known that for me if therapy isn't working after a couple months it probably won't.
i wish i'd known to speak up and ask for what i needed from the T.
i wish i'd known more about the different approaches Ts take and what to expect in therapy.
i wish i'd known that some Ts are just not that skilled, especially for me.
i wish i'd known that some Ts will just keep seeing you and taking your money even when it obviously isn't helping.
i wish i'd not seen any old T that was referred to me but to have done my homework and learned a lot more about them, their approach and practice.
i wish i'd been a savvy T consumer.

I wish... really wish that I had started working on me many years ago so that this painful process would be behind me and that I would be living in peace.

I wish I had known it's all a big mind game and it's a game that if you walk in a therapists office they assume that you've consented to surrender your choice not to engage in transference.