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  #26  
Old Dec 08, 2013, 09:27 PM
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elaygee elaygee is offline
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When T and I lived in the same city Ive seen her twice. One time my inner kid (Im DID) was out so he SHRIEKED her name across the restaurant. It startled her, and others. The other time we were texting and were both at the store at the same time. I passed her while she got in the car.

My inner kids always hope to run into her though its not likely now. But theyve nearly tackled 2-3 people they thought/hope was T in public.

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  #27  
Old Dec 08, 2013, 09:51 PM
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BlessedRhiannon BlessedRhiannon is offline
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T and I live just 3 miles apart, down the same major street. I have NEVER seen her anywhere but at her office, even living in such close proximity. I went through a short phase where I looked for T everywhere I went, just hoping I'd see her out and about. I'm not quite sure why...I think I just wanted to feel more connected to T or maybe wanted to just have some kind of different interaction with her. That lasted about a month or so and then it faded - about when I started feeling more connected to T IN sessions.

Now, I'm not quite sure what I'd do if I saw T outside of a session. I'm really bad about recognizing people outside of where I'm used to seeing them. There's a good chance I wouldn't even recognize T if I saw her outside of her office. I had two friends shopping in the aisle next to me at the grocery store and didn't notice them until they said something. Assuming I did recognize her, I'd probably just say hi and move on.

I did pass T on the freeway once - I was her first appointment in the morning, and I recognized her car as I passed her. I realized that meant I'd get to the office first, so I sat in the car in the parking lot for a few minutes to give her time to get up to her office first.
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  #28  
Old Dec 08, 2013, 09:58 PM
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Yogix Yogix is offline
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I used to waitress, and I was actually one of my T's waitresses one day.

... You can imagine how horrified I was.

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  #29  
Old Dec 08, 2013, 09:59 PM
Daeva Daeva is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Squirrel1983 View Post
I have never seen T outside if session. Once she asked if I was going to the band concert for the school I work at that night. I asked why? She said because her grandkids were in the band and she heard it was going to be a good concert. I puposely did not go, just so I would not have the chance of seeing her outside of session. I would feel weird seeing her in the "normal" world.

Pdoc on the other hand, I have seen outside of appointments. When I first moved during the summer 2012, I changed my address for my file at pdocs. He looked at the address and asked what streets it was located between because it looked familiar. I told him and he goes "oh we're neighbors, I live in _____ Estates" I was horrified that he lived so close to me now. I have seen him in the groceryn store a few times, to which I would purposely quickly turn around and go down a different asile to avoid him. Then one time when I was out in my grandma's pasture with her getting something out of her barn (her pasture backs up against some backyards of ______ Estates), I saw pdoc in his backyard. He smiled and said hi, so I pretended like I didn't know him and he was just being neighborly and said hi back. I don't know if he recognized me or not (maybe he was just being neighborly and saying hi), but it was really weird.
See this is interesting, I'd love to see my T, though thinking on it beyond hi I don't know what I'd do, I have this strange fantasy that'll never come true, well two. One is we see each other out and about and she just decides the hell with it, 'I'm adopting you Daeva.' and the other one is I see her in a restaurant and her date leaves her (Even though I think she's married?) and I go to her and sit with her and we end up kissing.

Quote:
Originally Posted by elaygee View Post
When T and I lived in the same city Ive seen her twice. One time my inner kid (Im DID) was out so he SHRIEKED her name across the restaurant. It startled her, and others. The other time we were texting and were both at the store at the same time. I passed her while she got in the car.

My inner kids always hope to run into her though its not likely now. But theyve nearly tackled 2-3 people they thought/hope was T in public.
That must have been tough! I'm glad you guys have quite the bond though!

Quote:
Originally Posted by BlessedRhiannon View Post
T and I live just 3 miles apart, down the same major street. I have NEVER seen her anywhere but at her office, even living in such close proximity. I went through a short phase where I looked for T everywhere I went, just hoping I'd see her out and about. I'm not quite sure why...I think I just wanted to feel more connected to T or maybe wanted to just have some kind of different interaction with her. That lasted about a month or so and then it faded - about when I started feeling more connected to T IN sessions.

Now, I'm not quite sure what I'd do if I saw T outside of a session. I'm really bad about recognizing people outside of where I'm used to seeing them. There's a good chance I wouldn't even recognize T if I saw her outside of her office. I had two friends shopping in the aisle next to me at the grocery store and didn't notice them until they said something. Assuming I did recognize her, I'd probably just say hi and move on.

I did pass T on the freeway once - I was her first appointment in the morning, and I recognized her car as I passed her. I realized that meant I'd get to the office first, so I sat in the car in the parking lot for a few minutes to give her time to get up to her office first.
I'm hoping my T and I get closer in session, cause I think that's what I want, I want the closeness with her. But I also find myself wanting to be a part of her life.
  #30  
Old Dec 08, 2013, 09:59 PM
Daeva Daeva is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Yogix View Post
I used to waitress, and I was actually one of my T's waitresses one day.

... You can imagine how horrified I was.

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Omg what happened?
  #31  
Old Dec 08, 2013, 10:03 PM
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Yogix Yogix is offline
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I was HORRIFIED. She walked in with someone I assumed was her friend, and I walked up to her table and didn't realize it was her at first because I walked up coming behind her, and got to the table, looked at her friend while saying "hi, how are we all doing today?" Then looked at the other person and BAM. Noticed it was my T. I stumbled a bit on my words, but I acted as though I didn't know her. She said hi to me in a more genuine way, so as to address that "yes, it's okay. Breathe" kind of voice. So I calmed down a little bit, and then did my job.

It was weird the MOST when giving them the check. Here I was paying her for her service, and here she is paying and TIPPING me for mine!

So. So. So anxiety provoking. The whole situation. I was so scared to mess up, to say something wrong, and not only that but her watching my greet and wait on other tables was petrifying too.

OMG. Haha. Never want that to ever happen again thank god I'm not a waitress anymore

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  #32  
Old Dec 08, 2013, 10:06 PM
Daeva Daeva is offline
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Omg I can only imgine the feeling of eyes on you, judging you. God that had to be AWKWARD. And then the billing and tipping, that is crazy! I'm so grateful I do not have to deal with THAT. Though I'd be as nervous as you but also excited and I'd say something stupid I'm sure.
Thanks for this!
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  #33  
Old Dec 08, 2013, 10:07 PM
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BonnieJean BonnieJean is offline
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I work about a mile from where my t lives. I've seen her at the grocery story 3 times and driving her car once. The grocery store meetings were weird and tough.
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  #34  
Old Dec 08, 2013, 10:08 PM
Daeva Daeva is offline
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I'd fear following my T in the grocery store. Ugh I'm such a stalker
  #35  
Old Dec 08, 2013, 10:20 PM
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I am trying to understand why its such a horrifying thought to run into t in public?
They are just people. Theyre not above you, they dont have any power that you dont give them... They are a partner on your healing journey, an equal. What is scary about that.?
I dont want to come across as rude, i really am just curious, as this is something i Have not experienced. Even on the beach with my t, i wasnt worried about her judging me, we were just laughng and having fun.
  #36  
Old Dec 08, 2013, 10:30 PM
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Squirrel1983 Squirrel1983 is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Starry_Night View Post
I am trying to understand why its such a horrifying thought to run into t in public?
They are just people. Theyre not above you, they dont have any power that you dont give them... They are a partner on your healing journey, an equal. What is scary about that.?
I dont want to come across as rude, i really am just curious, as this is something i Have not experienced. Even on the beach with my t, i wasnt worried about her judging me, we were just laughng and having fun.
For me it's not just T or pdoc. I don't like to see anyone outside of the usual place. One of the teachers I work with is also a waiter on the weekends at a restarunt I like. I know he works there Friday and Saturday evenings, so I refuse to go there on those days to avoid having him as my waiter.

I also turn and go down a different asile if I see students from school in a store. I don't even like to see my pastor outside of church.

I don't like all the places I connect with people being blended together.
  #37  
Old Dec 08, 2013, 10:33 PM
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Yogix Yogix is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Squirrel1983 View Post
For me it's not just T or pdoc. I don't like to see anyone outside of the usual place. One of the teachers I work with is also a waiter on the weekends at a restarunt I like. I know he works there Friday and Saturday evenings, so I refuse to go there on those days to avoid having him as my waiter.

I also turn and go down a different asile if I see students from school in a store. I don't even like to see my pastor outside of church.

I don't like all the places I connect with people being blended together.
That last statement couldn't be any more true. Thank you for putting it into words because I could never figure out how to communicate that.

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Thanks for this!
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  #38  
Old Dec 08, 2013, 10:35 PM
stopdog stopdog is offline
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I doubt I would recognize the woman out of context.
I usually can't recognize co-workers and students either.
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  #39  
Old Dec 08, 2013, 10:52 PM
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Karrebear Karrebear is offline
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I have only run into my T a few times. We work in the same medical building so it's bound to happen, every time is when I am least expecting it. When ever I want to see her, I never do.

One of my old T's I used to live super close to and kinda still do, I have never seen outside her office (which makes me so super sad) but then another previous T I can't seem to get away from. I ran into her at a Chinese restaurant once and now her kids' pediatrician is the same dr I work for. I avoid her like the plague.
  #40  
Old Dec 08, 2013, 10:56 PM
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healed84 healed84 is offline
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I run into my T a lot because his kids go to school my D goes to and the school I work at.. He does a lot of the dropping off, coming in to write notes for his kids.. So, I have seen him in the office, at school events, picking and dropping off.

If it is just me and him we address each other.. if he is walking with his kids we just smile. Last week, was the first time I walked into my office to find T in there and I did a double take, as I wasn't expecting to see him.. he saw me and smiled. I have gotten used to it by now.. I see his kids everyday, and his wife was a cafeteria helper last year and I was in charge of that schedule.
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  #41  
Old Dec 08, 2013, 11:34 PM
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RTerroni RTerroni is offline
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This has been something that I have discussed in great detail on these forums, but if I saw my Therapist at the supermarket (and there is a decent chance that if I see the person who I will be meeting with tomorrow on a regular basis that I might) then it will just be a few words.
  #42  
Old Dec 08, 2013, 11:36 PM
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It would be really weird for me to run into my T. I don't know why the idea excites me and freaks me out. Especially if we are both with our families. This is a big town so it's not likely but you never know. I think I'm most likely to run into him while running.
  #43  
Old Dec 08, 2013, 11:40 PM
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RTerroni RTerroni is offline
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Originally Posted by Karrebear View Post
I have only run into my T a few times. We work in the same medical building so it's bound to happen, every time is when I am least expecting it. When ever I want to see her, I never do.
Personally I don't know if it is good to see a Therapist that is in the same building where you work (creates too many conflicts in my opinion).
Thanks for this!
Daeva
  #44  
Old Dec 08, 2013, 11:47 PM
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EllieBear EllieBear is offline
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The first time I saw my T out in public was at the mall. I turned a corner and saw her a little ways ahead of me. I freaked out, turned back around, and booked it out of the mall as fast as I could before she saw me. I sat in my car shaking, and couldn't even look at her the next time I went into a session. I think for me it was a shock to see her exist as a normal person, but the biggest reason it horrified me to see her in public was because it triggered my "I'm bothering her" issues. I felt like I was intruding on her life. I was so sure she felt burdened by having to see me in session, that to have to see me outside of a session seemed like an awful thing for her to have to deal with. For about a year afterward, I would check every parking lot for her car before I went into a store to make sure I wouldn't intrude on her time by going into a store she was in. I felt so much shame over the thought that I might bother her. We talked about and have worked a lot on my mommy issues that I was playing out with her. My mom hated having me around and constantly told me what a burden I was just existing. I have realized this is where my shame comes from, so now I try really hard not to avoid places just because my T could be there. We live a mile apart...I am bound to run into her. When I do now, I try to remind myself she doesn't see me as a burden and I don't let myself run. I make myself say hi to her, and she knows the issues I'm working on, so she makes sure I know she is okay with me doing that. I have to admit I still avoid shopping or going to the gym when she is off work so I don't have to worry as much about seeing her. It's a work in progress
Thanks for this!
RTerroni
  #45  
Old Dec 09, 2013, 12:01 AM
PrisonBound PrisonBound is offline
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I don't even like running into my T in the hall. One time when I first started seeing her, I walked past her in the hall before our session, and felt so awkward.

I think I must be in the minority. I have ZERO interest in knowing anything personal abut her, and no desire to remain connected to her outside of therapy. And she's GREAT! She's helped me so much...just think it would be one more issue for me to deal with
  #46  
Old Dec 09, 2013, 02:34 AM
Anonymous200320
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I walk past the building where T's office is, on my way to and from work every day. I have met him a few times when I've been on my way home. Once I was taking the bus to another part of town for a meeting after work, and was standing by the bus stop conducting a conversation with T inside my head, when he came walking past. That startled me.

I would never strike up a conversation or say anything other than "Hi" to him outside his office. But I do greet him, and he greets me, same as you would any acquaintance you run into in the street.
  #47  
Old Dec 09, 2013, 06:51 AM
Daeva Daeva is offline
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The only time i see her 'outside' of her office is walking the Universities halls to get to her office, if we see each other, we'll stop and chat for a few minutes about everything, not personal issues unless it comes up, but a normal everyday conversation. One time I asked how her Llama was doing, and that sparked off a ten minute convo. A lot of times she'll help me with my psychology homework.
  #48  
Old Dec 09, 2013, 08:12 AM
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jacq10 jacq10 is offline
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I think most T's try and work in a place that isn't too close to their home to try and avoid the awkward run-ins....
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  #49  
Old Dec 09, 2013, 08:33 AM
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likelife likelife is offline
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I live a mile from my T and have never seen her anywhere. I went though a phase too of looking tub for my ex-T wherever I went, since we lived close too, but I never ran into her either. Except the time our kids were coincidentally enrolled in the same week-long summer program and I saw her picking up her kids. It was weird.
  #50  
Old Dec 09, 2013, 09:27 AM
stopdog stopdog is offline
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Originally Posted by jacq10 View Post
I think most T's try and work in a place that isn't too close to their home to try and avoid the awkward run-ins....
This is not true with the ones I see. One of them lives less than a block from her office and the other is in the same neighborhood. The ones I saw earlier also lived within a 5 or so mile radius of their homes. One walked to work and one biked.
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