[Bentay]

I'm a bit confused about my final session as I feel something is missing from the process. So I would like to know how termination for CBT works please (FYI: I received CBT for SA for 2 years).

Is there supposed to be an after care plan ?
Is my T supposed to give me a final letter or something that we discuss ?
Is there anything else I'm missing?

After our final goodbye I'm left feeling the ending could have, perhaps, been better. I miss my T SO much & this isn't helped by the thought that a lot remains unsaid. I don't know, it's probably my fault for not being more open about my feelings,but for goodness sake I have SA! (Im much better but still wasn't my T supposed to know that & make it easier for me to open up )

I also feel I can't write to him to express these feelings as I'll come across as a stalker or something - aggghhh, what should I do ? I'm thinking put up & shut up as I've left it too late

[HazelGirl]

Have you considered another type of therapy to work through your conflicted feelings regarding this termination?

[lrt1978]

When I finished CBT for an eating disorder, we made a therapy blueprint together, which was what lead me to therapy, my unhelpful thinking styles, what I have learnt, positive thinking styles, what do to things start going the wrong way, where I hope to be in a years time.

CBT only helped me to certain level, that was behavioural, I have now returned to therapy with a different T to work on the more deeper issues and what would have contributed to the eating disorder.

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[rainbow8]

I think it would be up to your T to bring up anything you're supposed to know about CBT termination and after care, not you. It's his job, after all. I wonder if you're looking for a way to connect again, which is totally understandable. I've been through termination with Ts, and I know how awful it can be.

I don't think he would consider you a stalker if you contacted him to ask this question, though. Maybe you'd have to find another T if you needed more help, like a refresher course. Or, you could see a different kind of T if you need help with the termination itself.

It takes time to grieve the loss of a T, just like any other loss. I hope it gets easier for you.

[Perna]

I do not think there is any set way termination works, for any kind of therapy. T cannot know you are hurting or that you are confused or have questions unless you tell him though. Some disappointment and feelings of loss are quite normal, it is an ending after all. I would decide where you want to go from here, if you want more therapy and what kind, etc. Or I would spend a period of time, maybe six months, working with myself and my new skills, see how things go and then come up with "what next" for myself.

[Bentay]

Originally Posted by HazelGirl

Have you considered another type of therapy to work through your conflicted feelings regarding this termination?

Nope as I'm in the UK my therapy is on the NHS, so I don't think that's an option unless I go private & I can't afford to do that.

[Bentay]

Originally Posted by rainbow8

I think it would be up to your T to bring up anything you're supposed to know about CBT termination and after care, not you. It's his job, after all. I wonder if you're looking for a way to connect again, which is totally understandable. I've been through termination with Ts, and I know how awful it can be.

I don't think he would consider you a stalker if you contacted him to ask this question, though. Maybe you'd have to find another T if you needed more help, like a refresher course. Or, you could see a different kind of T if you need help with the termination itself.

It takes time to grieve the loss of a T, just like any other loss. I hope it gets easier for you.

Hi Rainbow8, your reply really made me think & ur right, I am looking for a way to reconnect as I'm finding the ending really difficult. Having said that, I do feel the final session could have been better & I do have some questions that remain unanswered, not sure if I'll ask them tho. But thank you for your reply. - it really did help

[Nightlight]

I finished CBT at the same time as you, but I'd only been seeing my former CBT-T for about 6 months. The ending didn't really feel like closure for me either and now I wish I'd managed to say more. I think it's so hard to finish like this through the public system. I know I'm left feeling like the whole situation was not my choice and was completely out of my hands. It feels a bit different when it's private I think, because then it can often end with the door being left open and that doesn't feel quite so black and white.

I think therapists are all a bit different in the way they handle post termination contact, but I think many therapists would not engage in much, perhaps just briefly pointing the former client in the right direction. If it was something I hadn't discussed before termination then I probably wouldn't risk it because I'd hate to not hear back or to receive a blunt reply.

[Raging Quiet]

If its part of the IAPT in the NHS, can you get yourself referred again? When I worked in a similar setting you've described, patients could ask for further support or were given a list of other therapists/groups available after termination. T's didn't check back in, but patients were encouraged to re-refer if needed.

I'm sorry it was hard for you; the nhs sometimes feels like a factory, it's getting better though.

[Bentay]

Originally Posted by Nightlight

I finished CBT at the same time as you, but I'd only been seeing my former CBT-T for about 6 months. The ending didn't really feel like closure for me either and now I wish I'd managed to say more. I think it's so hard to finish like this through the public system. I know I'm left feeling like the whole situation was not my choice and was completely out of my hands. It feels a bit different when it's private I think, because then it can often end with the door being left open and that doesn't feel quite so black and white.

I think therapists are all a bit different in the way they handle post termination contact, but I think many therapists would not engage in much, perhaps just briefly pointing the former client in the right direction. If it was something I hadn't discussed before termination then I probably wouldn't risk it because I'd hate to not hear back or to receive a blunt reply.

Thank you, you made some interesting points about public v private therapy - hadn't thought about that