[DelusionsDaily]

So, as most of you know, if you follow my sporadic writing, I sent a letter to x-pdoc Feb. 20th. It was to ask him to be my pdoc again. He has another week to respond but my guess is...if he hasn't yet and he hasn't...he won't.

I have been dealing quite well with this disappointment. My hope was he'd talk to my therapist and consider it but he hasn't even done that...and that's ok. I have mixed feelings about all of it but underneath it all there is this peace I never would have expected.

I have worked very hard over the last 4-5 months to get to this place and am still working really hard. I've done more work than expected in DBT and therapy. I've also worked really hard at getting and maintaining a much healthier diet...vegetarian...nearly vegan and minimal to no sugary or processed foods. It was an incredibly difficult change but it's paying off 100 fold.

I truly believe that all the work I have done has paid off incredibly in this situation and will continue to pay off in the future.

I'm not sure what the point of this is except to share. Everyone has their own path and I wish everyone the best on theirs.

Good for you Melissa! Congrats on sticking to your meal plan and giving up sugary and processed foods. That sounds extremely difficult to do. You deserve so much credit for staying strong. I'm glad your pdoc is not getting to you in his lack of response. I guess that tells you a lot about him. Glad you're at peace with it. Thanks for posting. It's encouraging to hear your progress.

[Asiablue]

It sounds like you've made some amazing progress Melissa. Well done, it's not easy to really make the changes you need. Maybe him not replying has given you an unexpected sense of closure and that's where the peace is coming from.

[BlueSoup]

You sound like you are in a good place right now. I remember reading your posts when I first started coming to this site. I've noticed a big change! You seem so positive and in a better place. I'm happy for you, you are working so hard, and it shows in your posts.

Loosing your Pdoc is a real loss for you. If I remember correctly he was in your life for quite some time right?

I remember when I had to walk away from my first T. I was only with her for two months but it was a loss. I connected with her right away. It's been 5 months now. I feel the peace that comes after loosing a relationship (even though it was short, she helped me..a lot) I have let go.

It sounds like you may be around the same place. I wish you well