[circles5]

Hi there,

i've just a few sessions left of my course.
It's been incredibly helpful for my OCD, and i've made a lot of progress.

But, the problem is it was targeting my OCD only..
As that was identified as the condition worst effecting me at the time.

I've already had an entire course aimed at my BDD several years back.
But it wasn't cured - it made it infinitely better, but not fixed..

--

and now i'm about to be out of therapy, i don't know what i'm going to do..
At least now i don't hate myself; mentally,, - i've realised i'm not the evil being i thought i was for so long..

But now i'm left, still in a place where i can't take part in life.
As i am so loathsome of my Physical self.

If i were to get more therapy for my BDD it would be in about 5~months from now.
And i'm scared at the predicament of being adrift with my BDD as bad as it is for that length of time.
---

However i am very sure that i have a genuine physical health issue,, but the doctors all say they can't see it… i'm being referred to a specialist/physician but i believe it's the wrong specialist because the doctors didn't see what i am concerned about.
They just believe i have IBS, when i believe i have lymphedema.

I hate this so much.. i'm constantly preoccupied by this swelling (up to 7 hours a day)...
i don't know whether i need further therapy… or to see physicians…
I just want to be better.

Circles

[HazelGirl]

What is BDD?

[AllyIsHopeful]

Are you referring to Body Dysmorphic Disorder? If so, do you think it will ease up a little bit if the specialist is able to figure out what is causing the swelling?

[circles5]

hey HazelGirl,

BDD is Body Dysmorphic Disorder.

from Wikipedia:
'Body Dysmorphic Disorder is a chronic mental illness, a somatoform disorder, wherein the afflicted individual is concerned with body image, manifested as excessive concern about and preoccupation with a perceived defect of their physical appearance. An individual with BDD has perpetual negative thoughts about their appearance; in the majority of cases, an individual suffering from BDD is obsessed with a minor or imagined flaw.[1] Afflicted individuals think they have a defect in either one or several features of their body, which causes psychological and clinically significant distress or impairs occupational or social functioning'

^that's all quite wordy for me.
But i can't summarise it myself right now..
It's horrible that's all i can say.. been the bane of much of my life.

[circles5]

Hi AllyIsHopeful, yeah it's Body Dismorphic Disorder.

I would be delighted if the specialist was able to figure out the cause of the swelling.
It's if they can't figure out what's going on that scares me.

If it's got a name, or someone can at least recognise it, then i will be so happy, as at least i know what i'm dealing with, and how to proceed.

It's this uncertainty, and isolated feeling from being the only one who sees, and experiences this that really upsets me.
And if there truly isn't a problem, i should be over the moon…
But then it's all in my head.. - and I don't know how i'm going to beat it.

I really do hope they can find out what's going on.
That would be an incredible relief.

Regards

[HazelGirl]

I see. I am sorry. Can you use some of the principles from your OCD therapy and apply it to the BDD? I'm not very familiar with it, so I'm not sure if that will help or not.

[circles5]

thanks,.. - apparently OCD and BDD are being viewed as a lot more closely linked than they used to.

And BDD, definitely has an obsessive nature to it.. So i'm sure i could address the repetitive nature of checking things again, and again.
> Using what i've learnt about In my OCD therapy.

But the core feeling,,, or mentality moreover will take some more therapy to address it specifically, i think..
I should be able to calm the, compulsions, ,, so to speak, like the checking.
But i don't think i could tackle the obsession on my own.. - the core belief and what it means to me.

^not sure if my analogy was very on point… But i definitely will try to refocus in on other things. As paying attention to issues like this, just makes one more preoccupied..

thanks for the advice,

Circles,

[HazelGirl]

Originally Posted by circles5

thanks,.. - apparently OCD and BDD are being viewed as a lot more closely linked than they used to.

And BDD, definitely has an obsessive nature to it.. So i'm sure i could address the repetitive nature of checking things again, and again.
> Using what i've learnt about In my OCD therapy.

But the core feeling,,, or mentality moreover will take some more therapy to address it specifically, i think..
I should be able to calm the, compulsions, ,, so to speak, like the checking.
But i don't think i could tackle the obsession on my own.. - the core belief and what it means to me.

^not sure if my analogy was very on point… But i definitely will try to refocus in on other things. As paying attention to issues like this, just makes one more preoccupied..

thanks for the advice,

Circles,

It sounds like at the moment, that's the best you've got. Do you have the money to get a T without using insurance?

[circles5]

kind of,

my mum has offered to pay for a short course, but i don't want her to have to spend money on me.. she doesn't have that much cash to spare.. so it would leave her a bit dry.
I personally don't have money to do so.

But i still think i need to go and see a physician first, otherwise i don't know if i'll be able to accept that there's nothing wrong with me physically.

[HazelGirl]

Originally Posted by circles5

kind of,

my mum has offered to pay for a short course, but i don't want her to have to spend money on me.. she doesn't have that much cash to spare.. so it would leave her a bit dry.
I personally don't have money to do so.

But i still think i need to go and see a physician first, otherwise i don't know if i'll be able to accept that there's nothing wrong with me physically.

I can understand that. It sounds like you know what you need to do. Just hang in there, and allow things to unfold.