[Soccer mom]

I see my T. tomorrow and plan to tell her that I feel closer to her now than I have in the past 5 years. This is the first time I have been to her on a regular basis due to the death of my mom who was not very nurturing and had a prescription drug/alcohol dependence.
How do T's help clients move past feelings for them? Can you? While I love the feeling of closeness, I don't want to always have it and WANT to go see her. I want to move on and only need her the next time I need advice. I told her I don't like WANTing to come and she wrote back that I could hate her but it wouldn't help the theraputic process. (her smiley face)
My T. and I almost act like friends exchanging stories about our girls and she has said I'm one of the few she doesn't mind texting.
Just curious how all of this will play out. I feel like I think about her and our upcoming conversations too much and want to focus more on my family. How will she help?

[TheWell]

I've struggled with fatherly transference for my T. He said that it's something that will settle down as I get psychologically healthier. That it's a need being fulfilled and as long as I have that need I can't make it go away.

I think talking about it is a good idea. Good luck.

[HazelGirl]

It depends on the T. It sounds like you have a close relationship, and honestly, that should help. But in order for these feelings to go away, you will have to deal with what caused them. So you will have to deal with your childhood and your mother's neglect and drug abuse. You will have to go through the emotions of grieving and allowing yourself to feel the sadness and loss of the past, and then find how to meet the needs you had ignored now as an adult. It's a long process.

[Soccer mom]

Yeah, that's one problem. I haven't cried since she died. Unfortunately, I was more relieved. And, I think I'm still mad about it all which is blocking the grieving process. I have realized all through my life that I've had surrogate mothers - teachers/camp counselors who have given me the nurturing I needed but I didn't realize I was seeking it. In fact, I just read in a high school journal that I need to see a shrink to figure out why I liked that teacher so much.

[precaryous]

Omg, thank you, TheWell!