Are vaguely suicidal thoughts you know you'll never act on at all significant?

I think it is significant in that it can be a measure of how low you are feeling. When I get them it is a reminder for me to check around my life to see what changes I need to make.

For me SI helps me escape from the Sui thoughts - not a great strategy, but sometimes the only one available to me at the time.

Thoughts do not automatically lead to actions, so I would just see them as a sign that things are difficult for you right now.

Soup

In one way, suicidal thoughts are no big deal because something like a third or more of people have them at some point in their lives (sorry, can't remember the source of this estimate). But on the other hand, the thought itself is serious enough by nature, can be a warning sign of lower moods or tougher times to come, so when it happens more frequently or it's bit more elaborate (like you thinking about how you could do it), it's certainly worth seeing someone about it. Once you have it assessed, maybe you learn they're a sign of something deeper which can be treated, or that they're not anything to worry about. And maybe that's a better state to be in, than to have suicidal thoughts - which are by nature distressing - AND on top of that worry about what they mean!

Feefallin I'm sorry that you are having these feelings. From what you have written on here before I get sense that your sisters more erratic behavior tends to make your feelings and experiences seem less important. But I seriously doubt that they are.

Amongst social justice people there is a joke/warning about the Oppression Olympics. In other words, it is important when discussing social harms that no one group gets to claim that they have it the worst. I think the same thing follows with mental health. It really isn't going to help anything if those NPD keep insisting that they have it worse with MDD. Both conditions are serious and they effect a person's life in a big way.

I relate also to you experience of suicidal thoughts. There was a period in college where I wan't exactly suicidal, but I would go to class and start staring off into space, and have these horrible images of my own death. They really disturbed me. I've never actually discussed them with a therapist, but I'm sure that they were probably about some pretty serious emotions. Just because you don't act out and get a lot of attention for your feelings doesn't mean that they aren't incredibly loud for you. I'm sure give your posting on here that you are in a lot of pain. And I really do feel so sad that you have had such a hard time with therapists. I have too. It sucks, and I'm still working on trusting the one that I have, but I still personally feel like its worth it to keep trying. I guess I believe that if therapy is really done properly it can help a person, but it is an incredibly vulnerable space, and I don't deny that it can cause harm.

At the very least I hope that you can understand that however you feel is important, and that nobody has a right to tell you otherwise. How you feel absolutely matters.

I can relate to thinking that I am never in emergency or in a crisis as I'd never act on anything - is it true, I am not so sure though...

With respect to "intrusive thoughts", maybe it is something like "pure O" (primarily obsessional OCD) in which a person might have intrusive thoughts about hurting themselves or others etc. but there is no intent on acting on these thoughts at all...

Freefallin I hope you are doing better today. I wish I knew what would be helpful to you, from pc people.

I know in the past PC has allowed fundraisers for other members but I don't know how that works. It may be something PC staff has to set up or approve. Not sure if that interests you.