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  #1  
Old Aug 30, 2014, 09:35 AM
healed84's Avatar
healed84 healed84 is offline
Young Butterfly
 
Member Since: Jan 2012
Posts: 7,574
So, last week at my appointment, everything felt off. It was our first appointment back after a 18 day break and I was reserved going in there.

So, things felt so off that I felt like running from t and not coming back... Which is extreme, I know. I decided to email to Ana tell him how I was feeling the next day.. And he replied by saying he was being "confrontational" on purpose.. Not in a harsh ways, but to encourage progress.

Hearing the explanation pissed me off more.. First, I felt like there wasn't anything in particular to confront me on. But, also I thought it was bad timing.. I don't need confrontational t on our first appointment after break.. I need nice supportive t. So we talked about it yesterday. He admitted that is timing was probably off, but he was glad that I could be honest about it.

And can I just say.. Me being honest with him about my feelings and then him acknowledging my feelings did wonders for me! I ended up sharing something with him that I had been keeping in for months!

Just a little encouragement for us to work through out feelings with t.. Even if they are unpleasant!!
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"You decide every moment of every day who you are and what you believe in. You get a second chance, every second."

"You fail to recognize that it matters not what someone is born, but what they grow to be!" - J.K. Rowling. Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire.
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growlycat, pbutton, precaryous, unaluna
Thanks for this!
Aloneandafraid, musial, pbutton, precaryous, ThisWayOut, unaluna

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  #2  
Old Aug 30, 2014, 10:24 AM
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unaluna unaluna is offline
Elder Harridan x-hankster
 
Member Since: Jun 2011
Location: Milan/Michigan
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Go you! This post was not what i expected!! Its hard to find that sweet spot between "same enough to feel comfortable" and different enough to shake something loose, but it looks like you and your t hit it. This helps me see what my t is doing with/to me.
  #3  
Old Aug 30, 2014, 03:08 PM
Anonymous200320
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Well done, healed.
  #4  
Old Aug 30, 2014, 04:12 PM
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archipelago archipelago is offline
Grand Poohbah
 
Member Since: Jan 2013
Posts: 1,773
Great work. I have gone from conflict avoidant to almost confrontational due to therapy. I don't overdo it but if I have something to say, believe he is mistaken, or did something that made me hurt or angry, I let him know almost immediately and we work it out. The repairs are actually really good for the therapy as a whole.
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  #5  
Old Aug 30, 2014, 05:11 PM
healed84's Avatar
healed84 healed84 is offline
Young Butterfly
 
Member Since: Jan 2012
Posts: 7,574
Thanks, everyone! It does feel like I left therapy in a different place b/c of sharing with him how I felt!
__________________
"You decide every moment of every day who you are and what you believe in. You get a second chance, every second."

"You fail to recognize that it matters not what someone is born, but what they grow to be!" - J.K. Rowling. Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire.
Hugs from:
Aloneandafraid
Thanks for this!
Aloneandafraid
  #6  
Old Aug 30, 2014, 09:12 PM
growlycat's Avatar
growlycat growlycat is offline
Therapy Ninja
 
Member Since: Jan 2007
Location: How did I get here?
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Do you know what he was trying to be confrontational about?
  #7  
Old Aug 31, 2014, 11:33 AM
Anne2.0 Anne2.0 is offline
Grand Magnate
 
Member Since: Aug 2012
Location: Anonymous
Posts: 3,132
I think you showed enormous courage in being honest with your feelings, and this good stuff you are experiencing is the reward for doing so. It is not easy to be straightforward about how you feel, especially with a T (who theoretically should be the easiest person to confront, but I think it doesn't feel that way to most people).

FWIW, I am impressed with you and I am really glad you shared such a big success with therapy here.

and as a side FWIW, I have always gotten the most out of my sessions where I tell T that I'm bothered by something he said or did. And when I do that in my real life, it feels good too.
  #8  
Old Aug 31, 2014, 02:45 PM
healed84's Avatar
healed84 healed84 is offline
Young Butterfly
 
Member Since: Jan 2012
Posts: 7,574
Quote:
Originally Posted by growlycat View Post
Do you know what he was trying to be confrontational about?
yeap.. a coupe of things in particular dealing with some distorted thinking when it comes to certain aspects of my life as well as me engaging in some risky behaviors.
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"You decide every moment of every day who you are and what you believe in. You get a second chance, every second."

"You fail to recognize that it matters not what someone is born, but what they grow to be!" - J.K. Rowling. Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire.
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