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  #1  
Old Nov 12, 2014, 01:38 AM
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ThingWithFeathers ThingWithFeathers is offline
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Does your t accept small gifts? Will you give them something? What will you give? I'm weighing up between a handmade card with a heartfelt note and another painting like I did last year.
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  #2  
Old Nov 12, 2014, 01:40 AM
stopdog stopdog is offline
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I have no plans or urge to give the woman anything other than her usual fee.
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  #3  
Old Nov 12, 2014, 02:08 AM
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My T does not accept gifts. Blanket policy.
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  #4  
Old Nov 12, 2014, 02:37 AM
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ScarletPimpernel ScarletPimpernel is offline
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Nope. We both agree we don't ever want holiday gifts/items from each other. I personally don't like holidays and I hate holiday gifting (I don't think gifts should be given just because it's a specific day).

I will give my T pictures of my dogs dressed for Christmas. And I can give her gifts whenever.
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Last edited by ScarletPimpernel; Nov 12, 2014 at 04:19 AM.
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  #5  
Old Nov 12, 2014, 02:55 AM
Anonymous50122
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This is my first holiday season with a T. I'm not planning on giving a card or anything. I'm wondering if she will give me a card.
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  #6  
Old Nov 12, 2014, 04:46 AM
Inner_Firefly Inner_Firefly is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by ThingWithFeathers View Post
Does your t accept small gifts? Will you give them something? What will you give? I'm weighing up between a handmade card with a heartfelt note and another painting like I did last year.
Can you give T both the card with a note inside and the painting? If you tie them together with a ribbon, that counts as only one gift. All your ideas sound lovely, very thoughtful and creative. Please let us know how it goes and what you end up deciding.

Same as you I am giving T two paintings and a card with a heartfelt note (all together so it's a bundle and not separate gifts) to celebrate an achievement in therapy, just happens to be at this time of year.
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  #7  
Old Nov 12, 2014, 05:09 AM
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ThingWithFeathers ThingWithFeathers is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by ScarletPimpernel View Post
Nope. We both agree we don't ever want holiday gifts/items from each other. I personally don't like holidays and I hate holiday gifting (I don't think gifts should be given just because it's a specific day).

I will give my T pictures of my dogs dressed for Christmas. And I can give her gifts whenever.
Yeah, I'm kind of in the same boat. I could give a handmade gift to my t anytime, and I don't have a particular need to celebrate the holidays, but I gave her one at the end of the year last year and have been wanting to give her a token of my appreciation for a while (but not just randomly hete and there) - so why not at the end of the year, I thought
  #8  
Old Nov 12, 2014, 05:10 AM
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ThingWithFeathers ThingWithFeathers is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Brown Owl View Post
This is my first holiday season with a T. I'm not planning on giving a card or anything. I'm wondering if she will give me a card.
My t hasn't given me a card or anything before, so I'm not expecting one.
  #9  
Old Nov 12, 2014, 05:12 AM
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ThingWithFeathers ThingWithFeathers is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Inner_Firefly View Post
Can you give T both the card with a note inside and the painting? If you tie them together with a ribbon, that counts as only one gift. All your ideas sound lovely, very thoughtful and creative. Please let us know how it goes and what you end up deciding.

Same as you I am giving T two paintings and a card with a heartfelt note (all together so it's a bundle and not separate gifts) to celebrate an achievement in therapy, just happens to be at this time of year.
Aww. Thanks, that's sweet Looks like our ts may be getting similar 'one-gift' bundles
  #10  
Old Nov 12, 2014, 05:18 AM
SDarbo SDarbo is offline
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The professional rules about accepting gifts from psychotherapy clients makes me think most therapists have to decline any gifts. Accepting gifts is extremely problematic, even if there weren't rules in place.
  #11  
Old Nov 12, 2014, 05:27 AM
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ThingWithFeathers ThingWithFeathers is offline
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Originally Posted by SDarbo View Post
The professional rules about accepting gifts from psychotherapy clients makes me think most therapists have to decline any gifts. Accepting gifts is extremely problematic, even if there weren't rules in place.
Your right that ts definitely are not obliged to accept gifts from clients, and many ts do not accept them for a number of important and well-considered reasons. But aside from expensive or inappropriate gifts ts are ethically allowed to accept them. It just might be best to check with your t first.
  #12  
Old Nov 12, 2014, 06:39 AM
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Lauliza Lauliza is offline
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Ts aren't ethically obligated to decline gifts that are under $50 (the same goes for teachers), but I do know some have their own policies that may be different. If they don't then a small and simple gift shouldn't be an issue. I've thought about giving a card in the past but never did. It just felt too weird to me.
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Petra5ed, ThingWithFeathers
  #13  
Old Nov 12, 2014, 07:01 AM
AncientMelody AncientMelody is offline
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Two CDs from my favorite solo piano artist Philip Wesley. The music is very meaningful to me and I also thought I could discuss some of that in the session too.
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ThingWithFeathers
  #14  
Old Nov 12, 2014, 08:28 AM
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Yep, my T made it clear from the beginning she doesn't accept gifts. I wouldn't challenge her on that, because I'm quite sure if I were to present her with one, she wouldn't have the heart to say no.
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ThingWithFeathers
  #15  
Old Nov 12, 2014, 08:49 AM
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Petra5ed Petra5ed is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Lauliza View Post
Ts aren't ethically obligated to decline gifts that are under $50 (the same goes for teachers), but I do know some have their own policies that may be different. If they don't then a small and simple gift shouldn't be an issue. I've thought about giving a card in the past but never did. It just felt too weird to me.
I agree with this. I think the ethical issue is the value of the gift.

I'm going to give my t something. Probably chocolate and a card.
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ThingWithFeathers
  #16  
Old Nov 12, 2014, 09:42 AM
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I'm not much for giving gifts to anyone - it has connotations of have-to-give-you-something-for-putting-up-with-me for me.
When I do gift, I give handmade stuff. It'd feel kinda weird to give something handknit to a guy though... Too personal... I don't know why that feels different for women

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  #17  
Old Nov 12, 2014, 09:55 AM
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I don't have a plan to. I recently gave her a painting, and I think she would start asking too many questions about my motivations if I gave her something else so quickly.
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  #18  
Old Nov 12, 2014, 10:07 AM
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Lauliza Lauliza is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Petra5ed View Post
I agree with this. I think the ethical issue is the value of the gift.

I'm going to give my t something. Probably chocolate and a card.
Before I took my current ethics class, I thought it was an issue. But there is no rule in the code of ethics that says they have to decline gifts that are appropriate. The only rule is that they have to be under $50 which is standard for most professionals. It actually states they shouldn't refuse a gift if it will harm the client to do so, which is good to know too.
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ThingWithFeathers
  #19  
Old Nov 12, 2014, 10:09 AM
brillskep brillskep is offline
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I've given my therapist a gift for every Christmas and I plan to do the same this year, though to be honest he's been much less involved in my therapy lately. I don't feel as strongly about giving him anything now.
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ThingWithFeathers
  #20  
Old Nov 12, 2014, 10:22 AM
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ThisWayOut ThisWayOut is offline
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I don't do holiday gifts for t's. I might be terminating with this t around that time though, so she may get a piece of art as a goodbye gift.
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ThingWithFeathers
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ThingWithFeathers
  #21  
Old Nov 12, 2014, 10:24 AM
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ombrétwilight ombrétwilight is offline
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I gave her a note and a box of Belgian chocolates for Teachers' Day before I terminated. If I see her next year when I visit my alma mater again I might get her a gift of food (because she mentioned being happy when students showed appreciation in the form of notes/food).
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  #22  
Old Nov 12, 2014, 10:25 AM
Anonymous47147
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yes, T and I always exchange christmas and birthday presents. she told me the other day that she actually already got my xmas present
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ThingWithFeathers
  #23  
Old Nov 12, 2014, 12:53 PM
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nottrustin nottrustin is offline
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I am not sure...I have in the past given T a gift card to her favorite restaurant but not every year and not only on Christmas. We have discussed a couple of times the reason behind it and she told me that some therapists don't accept such large gifts ($25-$30) from clients, however, since she knows the meaning behind them she will.
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  #24  
Old Nov 12, 2014, 02:34 PM
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ive given my T things. they are usually like 5-10 dollars. he has given me things too. most recently he bought me a funny poster
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ThingWithFeathers
  #25  
Old Nov 12, 2014, 02:45 PM
Utterly Utterly is offline
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I have done. My parting gift to my former therapist was a 'big head' Sheldon (Big Bang Theory) toy, that can sit on top of a monitor. Pretty inexpensive.

Like a transitional object for her.
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ThingWithFeathers
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