[sidony]

Okay so I saw my therapist on Tuesday. Now he's away next week, so I won't see him until Tuesday after next. That feels like forever!!! I hate the thought of waiting so long. I don't know why I'm so needy, especially since there's nothing I even particularly need to talk to him about right now. The last session was good, life in general is going reasonably well, and there's no reason to think I'll have any crises next week. But I still hate not seeing him for 2 whole weeks!!!!!! WAHHHHHHHHH!!!!!

This whole therapy thing is a trip. The time I didn't get to see him for 3 weeks (he was gone and then I was gone) I felt really depressed. But I'm doing better now. I'm glad it's only 2 weeks, but still... TWO WEEKS!!!!!

Sidony

I know.

[Becca07]

I had to wait that long a few weeks ago, and of course that's when I had a major realization and freaked out. I felt so bad about intruding by calling her, although she didn't seem to mind.

So you're not the only needy one. Do you have any way of keeping your T in mind? Maybe write something to him, even if you don't send it.

Becca

((( sidony )))

Maybe we can help you countdown the days with some lighthearted humor or maybe we can cry with you.

I know it's hard. It's been a month since mine had her surgery and chemo. I am lost.

[sidony]

Thanks guys.

And (((Petunia))) I don't know how you've stood it so long! Awful!

Yeah I try to think about my therapist and what we talked about last session and what I want to work on. I had kind of a bad day today though and wish I could see him next week. Naturally that was bound to happen since he is away. I'll cope. But I've got a lot of stuff going on so hopefully the time will fly by.....

Thanks everyone.

Sidony

[withit]

Just the thought that one's t is off limits can make one feel real bad. Can you fantasize that your t IS available? You're just not in need of her right now....? If you really need to I suggest calling her. Leaving a message like, ''Hi, I miss you and would like to connect with you, even if only for a moment...'' This way you are asserting your need for connection with her. I think you may feel empowered, having a need and going for it....

[Perna]

One thing that helped me hugely is "counting off" the days. Some parenting mags/articles and stuff teach a caretaker when a parent is away on business or something to have the exact number of "treats" or a routine chart/calendar for the days the parent is going to be gone and then crossing off or eating the piece of candy, etc. so there's a better sense of time passing and one can see how many days are left until the person comes home, etc.

I use to use the large, individually wrapped Life Savers. Sometimes too I'd use my journal or hand-make a "calendar" in my journal and make a list of things I wanted to try/do while my T was away that I normally couldn't while she was there or I'd "practice" things (without the training wheels :-) knowing she'd be back if I messed them up but her being gone gave me an opportunity to try "for real" in a safe way (since she'd be back and could help me if I had a problem).

Yuh sidony, I've just gone back after a 2 week break. I feel bruised now. Feel all washed up...Its like i've managed the 2 weeks and now I've got to go through the whole cycle again. Getting connected only for another break. I am not looking forward to the 6wks break!! this august. It will be the 3rd yr and this yr it FEELS badddddddd!

[sidony]

Thanks everybody! And Perna, I love the idea of the candy countdown. I definitely need to eat more candy. I think I will start a countdown like that.

I probably should call him occasionally when I miss him, but I did tell him right before he left that I always miss him when he's away. I'm glad I said that.

And yeah, just knowing he's gone seems to practically cause things to go wrong. I hate it!

It definitely helps that I can complain on here and find sympathetic ears.

Thanks,
Sidony

[sidony]

I would have gone to group therapy tonight (if my therapist weren't away). I think I almost miss it. Well I definitely miss him, but you guys know I'm ambivalent about group (so far). But I would have had individual tomorrow morning. Sigh... I'm surviving just fine but there's nowhere I can complain except here.

Sidony

Two Weeks??!!

((((( sidony )))))

[sidony]

So is it coincidence that I picked these 2 weeks to have a health scare?! (Described in the health forum.) I guess it must be, but it sure is annoying. Of course the 2 weeks is nearly up anyway, and I get to go cry about my health problem in group and individual therapy next week.... It's definitely good to have sympathetic listeners outside my own family/friends (people who are TOO close are likely to be so panicky that I can't talk to them).

Blah. I'm telling my therapist he's not allowed to leave any more.

Sidony