I am new here so forgive me if I am just intruding.

My T is away on vacation and I am missing him terribly. I have only been with him a few months and i am still building an attachment/relationship with him but i don't have much of a social circle...ok, NO social circle. So i am lonely and feel very lost. i have a lot going on and very much need his support now.

i don't have access to emailing him or anything like that. i can leave him voicemail but he won't get it until he returns so there isn't any point to that... i see him his first day back anyway. i think i'm probably his most "crackerish" client. He made sure i got in on the 1st day back.

i talk to him in my head now.. he has finally replaced the former T.

i miss him and i feel alone. There is so much happening around me and i need him. He knew the timing of his vacation was unfortunate.. he said it made him anxious, which i thought was sweet.

anyway... that's it. i'm lonely and lost. No one to hang onto.

thanks for listening

[SecretGarden]

Well I am glad that you found us. Welcome.

It is indeed difficult to have a T leave on vacation when we depend on them. What can you do to fill up your time? My first T used to leave for like a month at a time...and that was rough. I got postcards though.

Sometimes listening to the message can be a comfort even if you do not leave a message or even if you can leave a message to let him know how you are doing..... He will get it when he gets back.

Is there anything that you would like to share with us? Otherwise... take care and know that you are not alone.... It looks like at least just three of us on this small board area have mentioned the same experience. We shall survive.

I think I will go for a swim this afternoon..... How about you? It helps.

[Direction]

Welcome to PC...

i'd like to share stuff... i guess i am feeling a little closed up since T has been gone. i'm in a difficult home situation and it's also making me clam up. If i open i might explode... or someone here IRL might have access to me emotionally. But i'll try harder.

i have a lot of trust issues. My T says it's for good reason because it's been broken so much. i never knew just how bad that had gotten until i tried to talk to him... and he is like the most open, calm and pleasant guy.. how could i not talk to him?

i've had two relatively brief brushes with therapy before.. the first a disaster and the second was more like short crisis management. No one has ever dug deeper really. i am surprised to read how many people seem to be in, or seem to be in, some form of analytic therapy... psychodynamic i guess? Couches and stuff.. free association. i don't think there is even any T's who do that here. They are all CBT's generally. Mine is Schema... but we haven't even got to that yet. It's also been predominantly crisis managment.. sadly.

Life is crisis.. for me anyway... and it has been for about two years.. worse in the last year. This past fall was a day by day process for me. Now it's better than that, but it's a struggle still. i get powerfully suicidal and have good reason for that. There is very little in my environment that i can control/change to make things better. Changing anything is painfully slow.

i have been a Babble member for the past few months and they have been a godsend. In the middle of the night when crisis hits i can pour my heart out somewhere. In light of the recent problems there i realised i needed more than one basket for my eggs. Life is too precarious for me not to. i am hoping people will like me here.

i do actually have a message from him.. an answer to a question that is relevant to my situation... and i listen to it over and over and over.

[Direction]

I'm glad you feel comfortable sharing and that you got an answer to one of your questions from your T.

I think you will find that people here are very welcoming and supportive.

Sounds like home situation is a bit "rough"?

welcome gerber, Yes it is difficult when T goes away. Posting on here can be helpful for filling that gap. Im sure you're not the craziest client!!!!....we all think that. Hope to see you around!!