I had a breakthrough during therapy... Sort of like my mind was being blown. We made so many connections and I felt SO GOOD when I was walking back to my car. T said he was so proud of me. I even took myself out to lunch afterwards and bought myself some things for my phone.
But now, I feel horrible. I think it's my paxil withdrawal but I just feel so horrible. I miss him, I feel like I have much more to say. I am also going to court with my abusive therapist that I am trying to finish up which is causing me alot of unneeded stress. I have so much going on and I don't have a real support system other then my therapist. I really want to talk to him about this but during sessions I either shut down or just ramble randomly wtihout getting into the real problem. Then it's like BOOM DONE.
It happened today when I was connecting things from my past to how I act today. Therapy was finished so quickly. He said on top of our sessions I should start art therapy. But I am unsure about that.. I also wanted to ask for a hug at the end of session but I got scared. He does give hugs after assuring me of boundaries which is okay with me. But, now I have to wait a week until our next session
Ugh. I wanted to just vent. Sorry if this wasn't good!

[CANDC]

Well the good thing is you had a breakthrough. Congratulations! You deserve a pat on the back or a hug.

The problem I find is when I go to a wonderful place, this releases more stuff I have to deal with. This is not a setback IMO just the natural cleaning out the closet.

If you don't like painting or drawing, there is music or creating poetry. One way to find out is to sit quiet for 15 minutes with a drawing pad, empty notebook, musical instrument and a brush paints and paper set up ready to go. After 15 minutes quiet, look at each of them and just go with your first impulse no thinking. Just play like a child. That is what we miss. The spontaneity of children.

[Soccer mom]

I have felt the same way. So great when I leave, not missing her, proud of myself and then I think of 50 things I wish I had said and get frustrated I have to wait.

I've learned that I can't really talk about it all. Some stuff will get processed and not need to be mentioned. I've also shut down when trying to talk about my feelings around her or needs I have. I did get up the nerve to talk about hugs and I do sometimes when I leave. she rarely initiates and I don't always either - just when I'm in the mood but it's nice to know it's an option.

Hang in there. I usually write her a letter when I have a lot to say. Sometimes I read it all the next session or I just pick a few topics.

I know that feeling too. I come out feeling great, but as the day passes I feel not so great and the next day wake up feeling not so great. I often feel that it was hard to have been vulnerable and close to my T, I suddenly feel insecure.

[LonesomeTonight]

I know what you mean, too, with feeling good after a productive session, then feeling bad later. I think of it as T Withdrawal--you're there with someone listening really closely to you and caring...then back to your regular life. I tend to have a bunch of insights either right after or the day after a session, and it's like I want to immediately talk to T about them. So I end up sending her an e-mail, not expecting a response (she's said that was fine). Is that a possibility for you? Or even just to type up an e-mail but not send it?

[ThingWithFeathers]

Oh, I known the feeling of sessions being too short and of wanting contact with t after sessions. It's a difficult feeling. The waiting is hard.

And there's no need to apologise for venting !