Language around therapy/therapists

Another much-used therapist word with a connotation of permission: appropriate.

Some of us grew up being so badly treated when we showed emotion that it is sometimes not all that obvious (to me at least) that I am allowed to have emotions without having to hid them or be ashamed of them.

I admit I have no idea what showing an emotion really means. I don't cry and from reports, I am often not smiling when I think I am. But for me, having someone else, anyone else really, but particularly a stranger like the therapist - would not change it for me. I either already believe it is okay and who is the therapist to tell me what is for me obvious or I just think the therapist is wrong. The thing is - for me, a therapist saying something either way is pointless and often obvious. If it isn't for someone else and they find it useful - then fine with me. I had this conversation once with the second one - she said X was okay and I said I did not agree. She said she did X in her own life - like that was somehow going to change my mind? I know others find it okay - I just don't. I guess I think things are obvious and if they are not, a therapist is not going to be the thing that either affirms or changes my mind

I just can't figure out why Stopdog, a bubbling cauldron of emotions, has trouble showing them.

jk you know.

But really... the statement isn't so much about showing emotions as feeling them.

I guess I don't know your history outside of what you've shared in this post. What is it you're trying to get help with? Is this a pattern you've fallen into with more than one therapist?

Stopdog will correct me if I'm wrong... but I think it's not so much about her wanting help as it is about her hearing her therapist making statements that Stopdog is curious about or irritated by. Stopdog, as you will learn over time, is uncommon. As well as fascinating and one from whom I have learned a lot.

Not looking for help - just wondering how others saw it and thought it might be interesting to discuss.

Stop Dog that would truly bug me. I allow myself to do whatever I want without anybody's permission least of all T's. I'll cry when I want and laugh when I want and curse if I want. Thank Goodness He never discussed what he permits with boundaries We new from the get go where we stood with that! He is humble and professional.

I have never had tell me what I can and can't do. Occasionally, when I am really struggling with a decision she might say I would like you to consider X however, I will stand by whatever you decide to do.