Twenty minutes.

I've had my session be interrupted due to an agitated client in crisis too.

He was shouting in the waiting room and the staff phoned in. She ignored the phone call and the knocks until the staff entered the therapy room to ask my therapist to calm him down.

We were talking about difficult things and she was gone for 20 minutes.

Midway, when the shouting died down, she sent a nurse over to me to tell me that she would be back in about 5 minutes.

She made up the time with me, and was very apologetic.

I felt I was a burden as well, like perhaps the man in crisis needed more time, but T only stablised him and rushed back to me.

I kept asking T if that man would be alright and she said he would be, and I shouldn't worry.

I feel your T should have made up your time. You're not a burden, you really aren't.

Its a perfectly valid feeling. So many of us have not had our needs met or responded to appropriately that we do have some expectations that our hour will be sacrosanct and ' our space and time ' won't be intruded on. There is a perspective but its reasonable to feel the way you do.

Did she make up the time lost?

As for needing a new T maybe you do. I resisted strongly breaking away from my T, but now that I have ts like a breath of fresh air. I resented her SO MUCH. If you build up too much resentment (deserved or not) you will not be able to get any work done.)

I started to resent being thoughtful and helpful Well, you know, no good turn goes unpunished!

Haha! The more time passes since the event, the more I appreciate your original post. Hurt feelings happen. Nobody's perfect. I'll be better about it next time.

My t, once took my whole hour for a crisis. I was in crisis too, but apparently not as bad. It hurt so bad. I'm still upset about it. HUGS

That sucks, and she should have either made up the time or not charged you. A few months ago, my marriage counselor said a the start of an appointment that he could only stay for 20 minutes because an emergency had come up (I got the sense it may have been personal but wasn't sure). He apologized and said he would never charge us for just 20 minutes (we'd already paid, so he gave us the next session for free) and wasn't sure if he should have just cancelled. But I was in a bad place at the time and was really glad he still saw us--I just jumped right to what was upsetting me instead of the usual small talk/relaying what had happened in the past week. It was actually a really useful session. But if he'd made us pay for it and didn't seem apologetic, I probably would have been upset. Especially if I knew it was about a client, since it would seem he was choosing that person over us. So I get what you're feeling. You should definitely bring it up with T next session or maybe in e-mail before that.

You could probably sense her worry and distraction. She might not have been able to give you her all if she had not dealt with the other person first. You should definitely not blame yourself for recommending it.

I agree with everyone else that you should not have to pay for that session. If it was not possible to go late and make up your full time that day, she should have moved heaven and earth to give you another appointment within 48 hrs. I would be upset too. I would wonder how loud my crisis had to be to make her take notice. And then I would feel like a jerk for wondering that.

If it was me I would have had a hard time getting back into the session. That said, I believe he/she owes you a free session, and an apology, even if one was already given. I hope he will be the one to offer this along with processing your feelings about what happened. Unfortunately, some therapist aren't that astute, but I hope yours is.

My T once was significantly late starting our appointment because he had a sudden crisis pop up. I was given a prompt apology and brief explanation and I received my full time. He is rarely late.

I find what your T did unprofessional. Crisis management plans should be in place in general. If the person was there threatening harm to themselves or to another person then either the colleague needed to deal with it or they needed to call to have this person taken to the hospital.

I'm trying to imagine a scenario where it would be okay for a T to a) interrupt a session to go deal with something else and b) not to make up that time.

I'm coming up blank honestly.

Even if I can't come up with a scenario, the latter is utterly unacceptable. If the time couldn't be made up right then and there with genuine apology, then they should have offered a time that works for your schedule and you shouldn't be charged for the session that they interrupted.

Your T should have known better.

I'm not sure what setting your T works in: solo private practice or group practice or MH center? That might define how a T handles a crisis. The other question that comes to mind is how would you want the T to handle a crisis if you were the client in crisis? To me, a crisis is a 911 call or equivalent. You said you feel like a burden and downplay your own crises when they occur; is that part of what you are working on?

I'm pretty sure I would just leave if my T needed to handle a crisis. There's no way I could refocus myself after being interrupted.

I really do appreciate all the responses, I really do. It's important for me to reality test my assumptions about the situation and challenge the automatic thought that this was my fault, that I'm not important, etc. etc.

This is a community clinic. Care isn't perfect. T and I will talk about it on Friday.

Hi just wanted to say that I have read this whole forum and as it went on it looks like you got a really good handle on your own feelings, even without speaking to your T. I think I would have reacted similar to you, there would be no way I could sit there knowing someone else was waiting.
I have a thought, (which could be way off base) but if you are like me and find it hard to stand up for yourself, maybe a part of you was waiting for your T to do just this for you, showing you that you deserve to have your needs put first, even ahead of this other person. To have a T do that for you even though you said it was ok must be pretty huge, although it does give the T a lot of power that we should hold ourselves. Is there any chance a part of you resented the fact that it did not work out that way?
I know that I am contradicting myself because of what I said at the very start of my reply but these are both my thoughts!
Well done for handling this whole situation so well. I hope it goes well for you on Friday

Thank you, Ana Yes, I do think there's a good chance I was hoping T would stand up for me where I didn't stand up for myself. I hadn't really thought about it that way, but I think you're right on the mark. I know there's part of me that wishes T had prioritized me over crisis person despite my saying it was fine. I figured this had to do with me being selfish and competitive and wanting to be 'the favorite.' It hadn't occurred to me that the wish might have had to do with wanting someone else to stand up for me.

Gee, what a mess our brains are.

I know. it's shocking alright!

Hello all! For anyone interested in an update, last session went great! T apologized (not so much personally as for the situation in general, but that's fine as we share the same view of the thing). Got a full session this time and T wasn't even late (gasp!) Didn't ask for any money back as I won't quibble over a minimal copay.

I'd like to thank everybody once again for all the feedback. It was extremely helpful and allowed me to go in and talk rationally about the rupture. Without your input, I may have just sulked there silently, angry with myself for being angry and not knowing why.

Enjoy your holidays!

That's great to hear, well done to you