[stopdog]

Do you think the therapist knows or understands you? Does telling someone what you believe facts about yourself to be equal understanding or knowing?

I tell my therapist a great deal more than facts. His ability to know and understanding is based on much more than facts and my words. It comes from observation of many aspects of me over time.

[Pennster]

I do feel like my therapist understands me- not better than I understand myself, but we work well together and he works hard to really get where I'm coming from. If there's stuff he doesn't get he's really good at asking for more information - I really like how he doesn't tend to assume things. I think we have some similarities in our personality type, which maybe makes it a bit easier to feel like he understands where I'm coming from.

[stopdog]

I don't find that the woman seems to know or understand - certainly not as much as she thinks she does. The second one talks about meta communication.

[magno11789]

I think she knows a lot about the stuff I talk to her about. However, she doesn't know everything about me. One thing my T often says in session and on her website is "we are the expert of our own experiences." She is not the expert of me. I am the expert of me.

I don't think he knows me well at all. I'm sure he thinks he knows me pretty well, but to be honest, I am nothing out of session like I am in session.

[Sarah1985]

I think mine knows me pretty well.

[laxer12]

I think mine knows and understands me well when it comes to the issues and topics we talk about. However, I am also extremely different with my T than I am with everyone else in my life. She has acknowledged that her perception is very limited but I don't think that undermines her understanding of some of my struggles and things I've been through. I feel like she understands me better than anyone else in the world but I think a lot of that is just because she actually listens to me and gives me the time to say things that are difficult for me to say.

[TerriLynn]

I have only been seeing my T for a little over a month and the last couple sessions he has surprised me with insights about me that I would think, hey, get out of my brain! Or what the hell did I say that you got THAT from, knowing it was true but having not told him. He must be pretty good at what he does because he seems to have a lot of insight already.

Originally Posted by lolagrace

I tell my therapist a great deal more than facts. His ability to know and understanding is based on much more than facts and my words. It comes from observation of many aspects of me over time.

(I'm back. Got sidetracked with laundry . . .) I do think my therapist knows and understands me pretty darned well. One of the reasons I knew almost immediately that he was a good fit for me was that even with the little I told him in our first session, he honed in with some very spot-on insight about me right away.

No, he doesn't know "everything" about me because we don't discuss everything about me. But when it comes to the inner workings of my mind and my emotional and mental health, he probably knows me better than anyone (and perhaps better than myself at one time although not now; I finally feel like I actually understand myself).

[atisketatasket]

Do I want to know what meta-communication is?

I think they think they know me, facts-wise and character-wise, but I'm not so sure they do.

On some level therapists must look for "types." Mine do show an ability to adjust their opinions based on new information, though.

[brillskep]

After almost 6 years, my therapist knows me better than anyone currently in my life (except for my grandmother). Though he has some blind spots too, so there are certain aspects he doesn't understand about me. There are also things I haven't yet shared. But overall he knows me very well, from both his experience with me and what I tell him about my life outside of therapy and training.

[gayleggg]

Mine knows me very well. We've been through a lot together.

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[Cinnamon_Stick]

Yes, my T knows me very well. We have done a lot of work together and she really understands where I am coming from and the pain I am in. My husband doesn't even get certain aspects of me like my T does.

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Well-ish. He knows some of my tendencies and beliefs but I think we are just different enough in our outlooks and personalities that he doesn't know me too deeply, and I prefer it that way. His objectivity is an important part of my ability to talk to him.

[NowhereUSA]

Do I think my T knows me? Yes. I don't think knowing facts necessarily equates knowing a person but it plays a part. Part of knowing a person is having a feeling for how they operate as a person.

My T has surprised me a number of times with how well he knows me in that regard. He knows how I operate which I'm not used to people knowing me that well.

[ruh roh]

I'm not sure how to quantify this. Early on, maybe a few months in, my therapist said she didn't know me very well, so I asked her how long it typically takes for her to know a client. She said she's still learning about people in her own life whom she's known for years, and that basically she doesn't feel comfortable thinking she knows all there is to know about anyone. Now, more than a year later, I'd say she knows how I am in session, and how I tell her I am outside of session. She's also seen my work and knows things about me from that.

[Serzen]

VERY well. He can instantly tell if something's wrong with me or sometimes even what I'm thinking. He's very experienced and perceptive.

[nicoleflynn]

He knows me very well.

My therapist has great insight into why I've done the things I have and feel the way I do, but I do lack emotional awareness. I'd go so far as to say I hate feelings. I'm very driven by my job, academic achievements and work, and emotions make me feel extremely uncomfortable. Which is why I fell apart last year, after trying to hold it all in together for too many years. She's helping me slowly adjust to (shudder) feelings. All feels very weird. But at least I'm not thinking about killing myself every hour or so.

[Chummy]

My T understands me and most of what I tell her.
She knows me, but she doesn't know everything. She knows things that have happened, she knows what cause me pain, she knows my anxiety, she knows my thought patron... But she only knows what I tell her and what she sees in sessions. So there is also a lot that she doesn't know about me.

[AllHeart]

There are times I think she knows me better than myself.

[Argonautomobile]

Not very well, honestly. But T can see the most pathological things about me with incredible objectivity and accuracy.

[nottrustin]

She probably knows me more than anybody else in my life with the exception of my husband. In our sessions I can tell her pretty much anything and what I am feeling. There is so much about my life that only she, my husband and best friend know. With her I also tell my fears and frustrations. I don't have to have a brave front on with her. I have been seeing her for about 7 years so she has really learned to read me and understand what makes me tick.

My therapist understands and knows me very well. Once in a while it freaks me out a bit, but mostly i find it comforting.