Have you ever walked out of a therapy session?

Yes. I went to see a new t, and i let her know i have DID. Been diagnosed for years. She said " well you should know i dont believe in DID."
I said well, i think we are done here then, and left.

Wow, you had every right to leave!

Yes, once. Other times I fight to stay in my chair.

I've come so very close a few times. Never did because I pay 100% out of pocket. Didn't want to rip myself off!

Thought about it once when I was a feeling a bit misunderstood, I'm glad I didn't.

Several times because he made me angry.

Thanks for all the responses! Glad to know I'm not the only one who feels like they need a break during a session.

I walked out once and t called the police. Nice to have my name on the police radio as being suicidal. Not.

I think your T will be very willing to let you gather yourself outside. It really isn't something she can say no to anyway. She can't lock you in her room

I have had the urge to run away when I am really nervous in session, and she always says "if you want to, go ahead!"

Yeah you're right! I know that feeling. Sometimes I sit at the far end near the door and my T jokes and says "are you sitting that close to you can escape faster?" and I want to say yes but then I dont want to be rude and offend my T so I laugh and say no :P But in reality I want to RUN.

Yes.
I haven't walked out of a session with my current T, but there has been a few times when I really wanted to leave.
Last year I walked out of an appointment with my Pdoc. I didn't went back that day. He had called me (I didn't answer) and he had sent me an email only 5-10 minutes after I walked out. At the next appointment he was really kind and understanding about it, which I didn't expected due to experiences with previous T's.
I've walked out of group sessions several times. Sometimes I went back, other times I just waited until the next session started. Usually a groupmember comes to get you, that was a rule. T's almost never asked about it. It's like it's their mission to say as little as possible in sessions. Hate that. Why do we need a T for groupsessions if that T doesn't say much.

I've walked out several times for different reasons (and different Ts). I used to walk out when I was overwhelmed & afraid to let him see me cry. Then when I was able to show him how I felt, he was so blank that I just walked cuz I hated having no response after all that work. Was angry, wanted to show him since he wasn't listening. I ended up walking out for good but he still cares and once in a while we do get in touch.

With another T, there were several times I just got fed up with him, again after all this hard work, that he couldn't respond or see that I was really upset & needed him to be there.

I don't really do it to prove a point or because I'm afraid anymore. I walk out cuz it's the right thing to do. If the session is going badly, and the T is distracted, why stay? Walking out gives me and the T time to reflect. Usually, afterwards there is some repair work. Not always, but often. That helps in the long run, but in the short run it totally feels terrible.

I trust too easily, sometimes stay when I should leave, but not now. Life is too short. I don't care about the money or time. I care about being seen & understood. If that is not happening, there is no point in staying.

um, yes. lots...

i'm pretty sure it is hard to offend T's as a rule, and this is pretty minor in the "offending" category.

My T knows I try my hardest not to be offensive. This one time my T asked if I was mad because of the homework I had to do and I struggled to say yes then my T says that nothing I say is taken personally. I hope thats the truth!

Very well said. Luckily I have a great T who understands and knows I'm struggling so the reason I want to leave the session is mostly because of the intense anxiety I feel and the fear of crying in front of my T.

My current T told me once "follow the tears" since he knew it was so hard to allow them even privately, let alone in session.

Today I didn't talk much. Asked for an "induction," kinda a time out, find a safe place hypnosis thing. I just went limp, tried to follow his voice and relax, but felt the pain, fought it off when I know by now that it's OK with him.

He didn't really talk or ask much even though that is what usually happens. He saw me heave my chest, blocking out things, & just took my hand, held on tight when I was limp, not really asking or aware of much.

That reaching out, both with real touch and his sense that I needed something even tho I didn't ask or speak, couldn't really, that was good for me.

At the very end tho I did walk out. I didn't mean it as something mean to him. I just was so upset & said that even if he had his own things going on, at least he had a family, kids, a wife who loves him and can make love. He can watch TV and read the paper. He can afford to take vacations.

I can't. Not now, maybe not for a long time. Walking out this time was something I did not to hide but to show. I needed to leave, to leave him with my reality, what life is like for me. I couldn't use words; I was in a "freeze" mode so I just collected myself as well as I could, said how we are so different and walked out.

I think sometimes Ts need to be reminded that they are much better off regardless of how hard things are. And if my walking out helped him see that OK. If he is defensive about it, feeling accused or something, then that is something else.

Either way, I didn't plan it. It just happened. We'll see...

I think it is. You seem like you have a good T. My T has ENCOURAGED me to show anger/hurt towards her, but I was all like 'UH, NO THANKS'

Honestly !! It's like my T WANTS me to be angry. My T asks questions like "did what I made you do make you mad towards me?" And I sit there all confused on how to answer and when my T says it's okay to tell the truth I just say "ummmm a little bit" then I say sorry to which my T freaks out and says that I can say whatever I want.

I could have written this word for word. I have such intense anxiety during my sessions that I visibly shake. My T asked me if I was anxious and said she could feel me shaking (she was holding my hands). I was really embarrassed at first but she made me feel so safe and comfortable that its doesn't bother me anymore. I had VERY intense fears about crying in therapy with her that I didn't let myself for a long time. We talked about it for many sessions. Then one session we were holding hands and I was processing some very traumatic, deep memories and emotions and I could feel the tears coming. She said "You can hold on as tight as you need to, its ok". That is when I lost it and started crying hard. I have never felt more safe with her than that moment. I was having a hard time breathing and she was able to help me breathe better. It was amazing.

I hope you are able to cry with your T. It is very healing and it honestly feels better to cry with her than when I am alone. Knowing she is there during a very rough emotional time helps so much.

Couldn't agree more. I know that if I cry with my T it'll be so much more helpful than crying alone. It's just that I have never really liked crying in front of anyone because I want to look "strong". I guess it's progress for me then that I actually have the urge to cry in sessions after seeing my T for almost 1.5 years. My T asks if I ever came close to crying and I say yes multiple times. I guess it just takes longer for some to let go and feel so vulnerable in therapy, and I'm glad my T has the patience to deal with that or else the situation would have been way worse!

That was the same thing for me. I was afraid to cry in front of anyone including my husband because I wanted to look strong. My T helped me realize that crying doesn't mean you aren't strong, it just means you are sad and tears are a healthy way to get your feelings out. It is hard to be that vulnerable but I can say that it's worth it.

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For sure. I just really hope that before I stop therapy I can let go and cry so I can experience it. Just once.

I'm like this too. I haven't had much anger towards my T, only lately I have it. Today I became quiet in session and my T asked if I was angry. And I couldn't say yes. I just shooked? my shoulders and stayed quiet. In my head there was so much, but I couldn't say it. And then when the session was finished she said I could email her if I wanted to tell her something I didn't say today. And she said it with such a kind voice. And I felt guilty for acting like this towards her. But I also still felt angry. I also wanted to walk out during session, but I was too afraid to be rude to her or to ruin things.

I find it so hard to express anger or other ''negative'' feelings towards people, but it's even harder to do that to people I like. I'm so afraid they don't want to see me anymore if I do.

This. My T's life and my life couldn't be more different. She's only three years older than me. When she was the age I'm now, she already was a T. She already was my T. She already had a boyfriend for some years.

There have been a few times when I wanted to say this to her. When I was talking about feeling lonely or other things and she said things like ''maybe it is actually better to that you didn't had a boyfriend when you were at your lowest because then you also had to deal with that and with the guilt of not being there enough for him'' and other stuff like that. It made me a bit mad. I actually think a boyfriend could have been good for me, if it was a good guy. Being so lonely, that's one of the worst feelings.
T has it so good.