Ex t used to say that to me all of the time and I miss it. It used to spark off my erotic transference being a female with a female t.
I am sure she was trying to build up my confidence but now that I think about it, is really appropriate? She knew I had feelings for her.

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[doogie]

My T says I am beautiful, but I don't think she means it in a physical sense as much as she means it in a "whole person" sense. She is trying to get me to see myself in the same way, for some context on why she would say that. It does feel odd, only because I see myself as the complete opposite of a "beautiful person."

[ruh roh]

Mine doesn't comment about my appearance at all, and I appreciate that. I'm not in therapy to determine what other people think of me.

Can't say he was one to comment on my appearance, not in that kind of general way. He might have commented on liking what I was wearing, or on my general affect (appearing depressed through facial expression/lack of eye contact/posture, etc).

[BayBrony]

Mine does but I have pretty Significant body dysmorphia. So its therapeutic. And I don't have any erotic transference

[Chummy]

No, neither my T or my Pdoc have said that to me and I doubt either of them ever would. Pdoc has never commented on my appearance. My T a few times. One time she noticed I was wearing a bit of make-up, an other time she noticed that that was the first time she saw me wearing a top with no sleeves. Last session she commented on my sweater. And during a session she said ''I don't think you're ulgy or fat''. But that's it.

I'm not sure if it's really helping if a T says to you that you're attractive, though it might depend on the client.

[atisketatasket]

Unless there's a true therapeutic reason for it, I'd say not appropriate. I've gotten compliments on clothes or jewelry from them, but I don't want any comments on my looks from a therapist.

[Cinnamon_Stick]

I would feel very uncomfortable if my T said I was attractive.

I wish my T would lol she's hot!

I would feel ok if my T said it, to me it would express something about me being ok. I wouldn't think about it being specifically about physical appearance, but about my presence being ok.

[stopdog]

No - I can't imagine how it would even come up. The therapist's opinion on how I look is not something I am in the least bit interested.

None of my therapists have ever commented on my physical appearance, and I have to admit that if they had, I would have been a bit uncomfortable. But then I'm in the older age range and commenting on one's "looks" decreases significantly in our society due to "old" people barely being seen as physically attractive humans!

My 2nd. therapist was a bit of a "clothes horse" so if I wore something that she liked, she'd comment on it and ask me where I had purchased it. That didn't bother me a bit. My current therapist NEVER comments on anything in regards to how I look--what I'm wearing, not wearing, jewelry or hairstyle. I recently dyed my hair after leaving it its natural color for the past four years; even that didn't elicit a reaction from her! Sometimes those psychoanalytic types take it a bit too far.

[substancelessblue]

Once when I was confused about an interaction with a group of guys, my T was trying to sort through it with me and explained by saying, "They see a pretty girl, start showing off..." I guess it was a throwaway remark but it made me feel uncomfortable yet kind of like a compliment at the same time. But it also irritated me as it didn't seem a great excuse for the behaviour of these guys.

I'm sure my T would never say anything like that. He is mindful that I have been treated as though sex was all I had to offer in my past and that I am sensitive to anything that could cause me to doubt his trustworthiness. I'm sure he knows that his opinion of my looks is irrelevant to my therapy, and that his expressing it would be damaging to the relationship.

[velcro003]

Originally Posted by Cinnamon_Stick

I would feel very uncomfortable if my T said I was attractive.

Me too. It definitely seems inappropriate, especially knowing you had feelings for her.

[Myrto]

My therapist has never commented on my looks and I don't see why she would. It's not exactly appropriate or relevant.
Even when I cut my hair quite short after having worn them long for quite some time, she didn't say anything, didn't look surprised, didn't mention it. Total blank face.
Although, now that I think about it, once I mentioned that women rarely hit on me and she said "well, I find that surprising" so in a way she was commenting on my appearance. It made me a bit uncomfortable I have to say.

[Argonautomobile]

Eww! Gross! No way!

I mean, compliments are flattering and all, but not from my therapist.

But that's just me.

[ilikecats]

My T compliments me on my outfits sometimes, and I appreciate that. I'm not sure how I'd feel if she commented on my appearance though. I think I'd be flattered, but it might be strange too, depending on the context.

[AllHeart]

My t and I both compliment each other often with harmless, self-boosting remarks such as, "you are beautiful" and "you look fantastic!" Nothing weird or uncomfortable about it. The specific word attractive hasn't been used but if it were, no biggie. Maybe being of an older age allows me to be more receptive to and appreciative of such things.

[JaneTennison1]

Ex T asked if some of the hatred I got was because I was younger and prettier than the person who was awful to me. I said younger? Yes but prettier? HA!

[growlycat]

I once took a comment from Long Term T to mean that he found me unattractive. He then corrected me and said that he did not think that i was unattractive, just that my weight detracted from my beauty.

Still ruins everything somehow.

[JaneTennison1]

Originally Posted by growlycat

I once took a comment from Long Term T to mean that he found me unattractive. He then corrected me and said that he did not think that i was unattractive, just that my weight detracted from my beauty.

Still ruins everything somehow.

Well that's a hideous thing to say. I heard a comment onces that no one should tell someone something negative about their appearance if they can't fix it in 15 seconds.

[Argonautomobile]

Originally Posted by growlycat

I once took a comment from Long Term T to mean that he found me unattractive. He then corrected me and said that he did not think that i was unattractive, just that my weight detracted from my beauty.

Still ruins everything somehow.

Wow. He sounds like a CHARMER!

[Cinnamon_Stick]

Originally Posted by growlycat

I once took a comment from Long Term T to mean that he found me unattractive. He then corrected me and said that he did not think that i was unattractive, just that my weight detracted from my beauty.

Still ruins everything somehow.

That is a terrible thing for ANYONE to say, but a therapist?

[WanderingBark]

I wish mine would compliment me, but he never has.