When I was in analysis, lying on the couch, etc, it was pretty personal at times during the 50 minutes, but as far as my relationship with T outside of that, it was very IMpersonal . . . Basically T didn't seem to have any time for me outside of the 50 minutes. Is this just the norm for psychoanalytical therapy?

Most of my other therapists would sort of end the session but would still make some sort of small talk outside of it, or ask me how my weekend was, or how my trip to therapy was, but T would just open the door, say hello. I would get in her office, sit down, pay her, she would say thank you, then she would wait for me to talk, then we'd have therapy and then she'd say, ok time is up see you next time. And that was it, every single time.

In reflection, I didn't miss out on much because I barely spoke to the other Ts out of session either. Maybe it's just the fact that i wanted to have a personal relationship with her but could not.

What is your experience, is Analysis therapy more impersonal?

[ruh roh]

I did not have the lying on the couch analysis, but I did have sitting up analysis and it was very formal. No chit chatting coming or going.

[awkwardlyyours]

Yeah, I don't lie down on the couch either but otherwise, it's exactly as you've described it. The only time my T said anything else to me was on a day when the weather was bad and she started by asking if I'd made it to the session okay (duh, yeah, wasn't I there?) -- I almost wanted to ask her in response if she was feeling well

ETA: I believe I have psychodynamic therapy (so, not traditional analysis)

[stopdog]

I count on it being so

[AllHeart]

The word "psychoanalytical" alone sounds impersonal to me. My guess is a yes.

[retro_chic]

I have psychodynamic therapy which I believe is similar but slightly different. Compared to my previous two Ts who were CBT based, my current T is kind of less personal. It's hard to explain though - she is very warm and understanding but quite formal at the same time. She has commented on the weather before when it was really hot and another time she offered me a glass of water which I declined. Other than that everything is very "to-the-point".

There is also zero self-disclosure on my Ts part. She actually works under her maiden name which I only know due to my rather in-depth Facebook stalking (I'm not proud of that by the way).

My therapist does relational psychoanalysis. I don't lie on a couch but sit across from her, face to face. There is not any "initial" chit chat when she opens her door and invites me into her office. Her smile is warm and she greets me by my name, but she ALWAYS sits and waits for me to open the session. I like that. My last therapist, who I liked, was very chatty and bubbly and she would ask a lot of initial questions about my week. I kind of like having complete control over what we're going to begin with and how and when I'm going to present it.

If I want to have a session with some humor or casual chit chat, my current therapist doesn't try to cut me off. She likes a good laugh and she isn't against a bit of off topic political talk if I want to grouse about the state of our country, but she'll get me back on track gently. She has time for me outside of session if I desire. I'm not much for calling as I hate the phone, but I'll send an occasional email following a session if I want to process something. I always say that she does not need to reply, but she'll always let me know she received the email with a short "thanks" or "good things to talk about more".

Our sessions aren't dead or one-sided. Relational psychoanalysis is very much about what's happening between the two of us. We both need to "own" our side of what's going on and we really examine indepth what's going on in a very deep and honest way. She is not a "chatty" person, but she is definitely NOT a blank slate. I can ask her how she's feeling about something that is going on in session or how she perceives something I've said and she will honestly respond. I find that I think deeply about the topics we talk about and more than therapy I've had in the past, I'm much more interested and driven to go even deeper. I felt ready for this approach at this point in my life and I've found it very helpful. But I do think that it is HER approach and HER personality that has made this approach click for me. She is calm, unflappable, honest, intelligent and willing to own her own stuff--I like that! Nothing is ever off the table when we're engaged.

[barbella]

I saw a T for a while who did psychoanalysis and it was impersonal. but I think that's how it's supposed to be? I found it helpful but it certainly wasn't 'warm'.

I have psychodynamic therapy now and it is much warmer.