The Couch - 109: CIX-Reintroduction

Hi couch. I'm miserable. Significant Other (long distance) lectured me on Skype on how I'm too coward to stand up for myself.

That if he and other abused people with worse histories than me can leave, then I'm able to, if I stopped being so scared.

I can't... I have to protect my brothers... I already pay for mine and one brother's psychotherapy in secret. I'm an adult with a job but I'm so instrumentally dependent on my parents and severe social anxiety.

I'm too weak...

Not too weak. You just haven't built the supports for when you leave.

Culturally in my Asian country, I'd be breaking a huge taboo too. I wish my Significant Other wouldn't give me more reasons to loathe myself.

I'm glad your T went well, Ellahmae.

Virtual hugs with no touching involved are the ideal kind of hug for me.

Hey, CE, the other night I managed to get 3 British crossword clues right off!

Teri kids about island troops in barracks (9) (don't understand that one)
Stuck with dizzy redhead (7)
Recreation at Conservative clergy member's house (7)

I am sooo tired of being awake but it is too early to go to bed. I will play on the internet for a bit then turn in.

so i have T today but again i had no reminder call. last time i called and found out my T had not put me on the schedule. i called her and she told me i do have an apt. when i saw her she told me that i always have an apt unless i am told otherwise by her . but once again she has forgotten to put me on the schedule. i cant help but think there is something behind this . is she getting burned out by me . am i being to much these days and this is her way of dealing . in 5 years of seeing her she has NEVER forgot to put me on the schedule. now she has done it twice in a row

Nope! But thanks for making me laugh!

Granite, who makes the phone calls to verify your appointments? If it is your T herself, just ask her to, even though your appointments are regular, go ahead and give you a call as it reassures you. If it is a secretary, perhaps what is going on has to do with how your T is logging in your appointments. It could be something as simple as your T has blocked off your time but doesn't have your name on that block of time so the secretary doesn't know to call or something; could even be a calendar software/input thing that for some reason changed. I know I've had things completely disappear off my computer calendar because some box wasn't checked, or show on one computer and not on another. Drives me batty. Generally happens after some software update. Who knows? Just talk to your T about it. She verified with you last week that your appointments are scheduled unless she says differently. This isn't some passive/aggressive message on her part to you. Your T has never worked that way; she wouldn't start playing games with you now. She's not that kind of T. Talk to her again about the problem and maybe she can figure out why you aren't showing on her schedule.

I wish my boss would leave so I could lay my head down and take a nap. I really should sleep when I feel like I can.

Crazy storm just blew through. 70mph winds, hail. News station said the rainfall rate was 7.5 inches/hour. Good thing it blew through fast and only lasted about 10 minutes. Remarkably our fence is still standing (more or less); it's in bad shape to start with.

It rained here last night, surprised me! Must have been windy too cuz there's tree branches in my backyard. I slept thru it.

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(yawn) they're bringing in pizza for us today since yesterday was so crazy with the system update failure. I love pizza! 🍕

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Went to pharmacy to get allergy meds, trying to get a leg up on it before it completely overwhelms me. Stopped at Taco Bell on the way back to work, quesadilla yum. Hope you're all having a wonderful day!

Had to get a law firm involved in a dispute - blah. I feel like I'm in a TV show like I want to give them every ounce of paperwork I have so they can have the mounds of paperwork that they show on TV. I refrained, only sent them 4 documents

I was thinking Taco Bell for lunch too - cept I'm so tired I don't want to get out of my desk chair.

Well done! I don't see any off them off hand, although "Teri kids" ought to be an anagram.

Ts have private lives that sometimes break their concentration. I doubt it has anything to do with you.

Enjoying my free pizza! It's cold and flavorless as usual but it's free so I'm happy!

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"Adhered"

Stuck - meaning
dizzy - anagram indicator
redhead - letters to be rearranged

im just scared to go to T today for so many reasons .this is just dtupid e have not always seen eye to eye but i dont think she had ever done horrible emotional damage to me at all

Yes...and Teri etc. had to be "garrisons" (Teri Garr), but for the life of me I can't figure it after garr-.

Rec(reation) + Tory for Conservative = Rectory

Of course, I haven't been able to get any since then.

I just can't believe how much T1 communicating with me has destabilised me. I have been doing so well for so long. This week at uni I got a result I was okay about for an assignment, but I would have liked to have done better and I didn't get a lot of feedback so I went to the tutor to ask for a tutorial and I actually started crying when I tried to say I didn't feel like I got enough feedback. Crying over f-ing feedback! What's wrong with me?

I have no idea who Teri Garr is. But anyway: rebus

Teri - "Garr"
kids - "sons"
about island - put these two parts around the letter "i"
troops in barracks - meaning, "garrisons"