Pre and post session thoughts. Share yours..

I am the first appt. Today. I usually dont book first ones, as a favor to him. ( not much to look forward to when 1st appt is timentimenagain). And i hope hes in office before me n is not running late. It ll b wierd me sitting in waiting room and he walking in to go to his office.
Besides that. No expectations. Last session was great. Today could b boring and bland. When i go in with expectations...i get disappointed. I am unable to talk freely and hold back. When i dont think too much about the session....voila!!! the things i say .... hoping today is one of those days...when i talk openly.
Otherwise i ll b back here to say ...y do i go to see him ? What a waste
Then i will show up again at next appt. Trying again!
Those of u with sessions today..i hope they go really well...
I ll update once i m back .

Pre session thoughts - OMG, I'm going to puke! Why do I do this to myself?

Post session thoughts - OMG, I'm so glad I came today. Why do I get myself so worked up over coming here?

I have a session this afternoon. I feel ok about it. We will probably continue where we left off last week. It's hard, and I feel drained after. I have a lot going on in my life right now. The thing I don't like about therapy is that after I see my T I have this intense longing to be with her that lasts a few days and feels unbearable. Once those feelings wear off and I get some peace about the feelings, then it's time to see her and it all starts over again. I need to find a way to deal with that.

Post session thoughts : it went okay. I say that cause i have alot to reflect on...absorb...understand and follow through. I feel very motivated and believe in myself that i can do this. Hopefully, i ll act on it before this empowermemt fades away.

Doogie...i have the exact same issue. After session...all i can think about is my T...n plan my next session...count days...and pray the week goes by fast...by the time session time rolls around...i have lost all the enthusisam...n wonder what will i talk about today.

Journaling keeps me connected longer ...but who got time for that

Pre: Looking forward to my session today, particularly to just a bit of time to sit in the lobby and snuggle down into that awesome leather couch and rest. I have a few things to talk about. I wonder where that will lead?

Post: That was difficult. Time to go home and get my mind on something else and decompress. What am I cooking for supper?

Pre: I don't have anything to talk about.

Post: I really didn't have anything to talk about so I am glad I left 10 minutes early. Maybe I should quit therapy.

I am the same way with building up expectations and then leaving therapy disappointed. Usually my sessions go something like this:
Pre: Okay annielovesbacon review your journal and think about how you've been feeling these past weeks... what do you want to talk about... don't forget anything!
Post is either 1: That session was great, we got to talk about everything I wanted to and I feel like we made progress
or 2: ugh I forget to mention x or I wish T had let me talk more about y instead of talking about z.

Pre-session - Aaaaarrrrgggghhhh, I don't want to go to new T. I don't know her, can't remember her, don't know where we will be, don't know what I want to talk about, don't know if I even want to continue therapy. But my inquisitiveness will take me anyway and my sense of duty to old T, how ridiculous is that. I do want to make changes I just don't know if I can it if I want to do the work involved. What will she say, what will I say, will I be able to talk, will she get out the art stuff so early on. So many questions I wish my head would shut up and leave Mr alone. Ah well, I better go.

Post-session - It was hot and yet still I don't want to take my coat off, what am I going to do when summer actually hits us. Why is it even an issue, oh yeah, I know, those barrier defences. She seems OK, and glad she seems able to commit to some out of session contact and twice a week some weeks. Let's keep it flexible. Am I committed? No I don't think so, not yet. I liked that she waved me off as I had to walk past the door after the drive. She now knows my shift pattern, let's see of she keeps up with it, she would be the only person in my life who does! Most of my questions were answered, except for seeing the special room, I didn't ask. Maybe I should ask next week. Ah next week, maybe I am showing some signs of commitment! One day at a time.

Pre t1: I can't wait, been looking forward to it for days. Sometimes I have somgething I want to talk about. Sometimes not.
Post t1, usually ok. Calm, centered. But sometimes horribly insecure.
Pre t2: I wonder what we will talk about
Post t2: I probably should stop seeing her but I don't know how
Pre t3: anxiety. I want to do SE
Post t3, calm but often have a headache

Pre session thoughts: I am so anxious, I think I am gonna puke. I don't want to do this. Will we have enough time to talk about everything? This attachment and transference sucks.

Post session thoughts: Why do I have to leave her? Therapy is so hard. I can't handle this attachment anymore.