How long did it take you?

Was wondering how long it took to open up to your T?

With my first T, it took 10 months to even share my feelings with her. But she quit being a therapist, I was sent to a an Outpatient program which does group therapy for eight hours a day. Where my new T was working at the time. She was a group leader. She quit and got a job as a therapist. When I graduated that program I was referred to her as my new T. It's a bit weird for me, and uncomfortable. We always got on but trying to view her differently is weird for me, I don't know how to explain it. but it's like there's a brick wall between us when it comes to talk about personal things rather than a normal conversation or joking around which we do often.

I don't know, I just don't have the connection with her like I did with my previous T (Who I miss dearly). I know early on I expected her to be like my previous T but I've come to accept she's a very different person so that was foolish of me to expect. It's just like there's nothing underlying are superficial relationship. I've been seeing her for 6 months. I'm hoping it just needs time to form that relationship like it did with my previous T but I have a bad feeling it just isn't going to work out between us and I don't want to waste time with this T if it isn't going to work. For her to get anything from me is like pulling teeth--and the pain it takes me to tell her is like getting my tooth pulled. On the other hand I don't want to start over again with a new T, I don't know if in my depressed state that I am in if I have the energy for that. I feel stuck in a rut.

Anyone have a similar experience?

I ran into a few therapists that I felt very ambivalent about. I don't think they were bad therapists; we just had no connection and I just felt nothing around them. I might as well have been talking to a wall. It really wasn't anything they did wrong; it was just a matter of our personalities just not jiving I think. I didn't keep seeing them. I think the longest I stayed with one like that was a couple of months (maybe 5 or 6 sessions). I learned that a general comfort with a therapist was something I personally can pick up on very early on (usually the first session) and if I don't feel it, I move on until I find one where our personalities mesh more comfortably.

It took me a few visits to open up a bit, a few months to open up to the point of first being vulnerable. And about a year to fully open up.

Since three months I have this new therapist. My other T went on maternitely leave. They work at the same place. That other T was the first T I trusted, the first one who understood me and my ''issues'' and the first one who actually helped me. I have known her for years.
This current replacement T, I like her. She's a good T. She's different than my other T. Some are good differenties, some I like less.
I actually opened up to her really fast. With other T it took a long time. With all the T's before her it never really happened.
Though I like this T and we work well together, it doesn't feel like with other T. It's a feeling. Maybe I don't feel much of a connection. Things she says to me do less to me than when other T would say it to me.
I think the therapy with this current T could be good for me, but I miss other T. Eventhough she isn't perfect and I'm angry at her for some things and I like some things about current T better.

I wouldn't care much if current T would say that she can't be my T anymore, but I'm still upset about my other T's leaving. It's about feelings. Maybe I'm also sort of protecting myself, to not get attached to this new T?

Ive been seeing the same T for about 2 years now and I started opening up maybe 3 months ago. It takes me FOREVER to open up to someone and even then it's not fully opening up. I guess each session that passes I force myself to open up but sometimes I still can't.

I've been sseing my T for 6 years and felt I liked him enough to talk to him but I only started opening up in the last year or so. I open up then shut down then open up again etc.

I'm going on 5 years with my t and I'm still opening up to her. As in we've barely scraped the surface of the 18 years I lived at home (where all my "problems" lie). Sometimes it feels like I'm never going to be able to quit therapy because there's just so much crap to deal with. Like BunYip said above me, I'll start to open up and then shut down again. It's a terrible cycle.

took me 4 years to talk about certain issues and took me 1 and 1/2 years to actually speak i passed notes the whole time before that.

I actually opened up rather fast. I've gotten used to giving people my history. And I was in a vulnerable state seeing how my ex-T just abandoned me, so I couldn't take my time. It did, however, take me several months if not a year to tell her my darkest secret.

I opened up almost right away...I was kind of at a boiling point by the time I saw a therapist, I needed to get it all out.

It took me about eight months to really open up. The opening up is still in process

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Like others, it's been a gradual process. Some things I opened up about right away, other things took months, other matters I didn't mention until well over a year working with him. It is a process.

It's a process for me too. It took me about 2 months to open up a little and about a year to feel very safe with T. Not entirely, I didn't get there by the time I ended therapy. I wanted to gradually work towards termination, but the idea of having to let go of my T caused such grief that I couldn't handle taking it slowly.

There was some unfinished business and also some new issues arrived, that's why I got back in therapy about a year later. In the beginning, I had to get used to him again. There was still a connection and I still trusted him, it just took a little time to open up again. Now I'm doing quite well and I leave more time between appointments. My T fills another role in my life, I don't lean as much on him anymore. That's probably very healthy and it must mean that I'm making progress. But it does make it harder to disclose sometimes.

It took me three years, but it was a big mistake. I got hurt really badly in the end from trying to trust him.

I don't really have a straightforward answer. The first T I saw I took a long time opening up because I was very guarded and closed off. I wasn't used to being totally open with people, it wasn't really their fault. It was probably a year or more. My second T also took a while, though not as long. At the start I was able to open up in kind of a this is what happened sort of way but not in a this is what I am feeling kind of way. Eventually I was able to let myself be totally vulnerable because I trusted them and they had shown that they were trustworthy. Other T's have been similar but most have just been surface deep. I'm more open at the start with what I am dealing with or what I have dealt with. The trouble I have is connecting with a therapist and feeling comfortable being vulnerable with them. So not just saying X happened but saying X happened and it made me feel Y and it hurts a lot. It takes a while for me to trust and feel able to express emotion.

I agree that the initial gut feeling of connection can make a difference. Sometimes even though there is nothing wrong with a therapist, they just aren't the right therapist for you at the time.