[Gahara7]

I’ve been thinking of going to a therapist for almost an entire year now, but I just feel that I can’t do it. One part of me keeps on telling me that I need some help and I should go, and another part tells me a straight “No”. I know all too well that I’ve reached the point where I can’t deal with my problems on my own anymore, but on the other hand there are two...issues here.

For one, I don’t trust therapists. I generally am a very pessimistic person and always think of the worst case scenario first. And because of that, I can’t trust some random person that I don’t know with all of my mental problems. It doesn’t matter if they are professionals at this; therapy is still a job, and they more likely than not have grown bored of it. Therapists are humans too, so at some point they must have grown bored of listening to everyone’s problems, while they probably have their own issues to deal with. Some must be doing it for the money. And who knows what they are thinking of you while you open up to them. The only way I can trust someone with everything that is going on in my head is if they have no issues of their own, and they won’t secretly judge me or ridicule me behind my back. Basically, I can only trust a robot with this.

And second, I can’t have my family know of this. I have tried hundreds of times to tell them of the mess that is my mind, but they always brush it off like it’s something trivial. I have kind of spent my whole life pretending that nothing is wrong with me, and it looks like my parents could not be more convinced that they have a brilliant, just shy and reserved, daughter. Every time I try to gradually tell them that there are things wrong with me, their replies are always “You are overthinking it”, “Don’t worry, it’s normal, I can understand how you feel” or “Don’t say stupid things, you are not like that”. So I know that if I tell them I want to see a therapist, they won’t let me do it, because they will believe I’m going overboard. And if I do actually go for it without telling them, I will surely be told at some point by whoever therapist I go to that I have to inform my parents of my situation...

So, in the end, I have no idea what to do...

[Argonautomobile]

Wow, Gahara, It sounds like you've been suffering for a long time. I'm sorry you're feeling this way. I don't think anyone here can tell you what you should do, but it sounds to me like you're ready for something to change. Many people find therapy helps them with that; Many others find a way to do it without therapy. Everyone's different.

I don't think you're alone in your concerns. I think most people find it difficult to open up to a stranger, even a stranger who is not supposed to judge. I know I did--still do, sometimes. For me, it just got to the point where there just wasn't another option. I just had to take a leap of faith, trust little by little, and hope it worked. For me, that paid off.

Plenty of people have unsupportive families, too, though I wouldn't be so sure you'll have to inform your parents. Even if you're a minor, I think a therapist would respect your confidentiality up until the point s/he feels you're a danger to yourself or others.

I hope you find a solution that works for you.

Gahara7, I second what Argonautomobile writes, but I'd also like to say that in my experience a therapist will not tell you that you have to inform anybody else in the world that you're in therapy. It might depend on how old you are, if you are a minor and still living with your parents, and whether you'd have to pay for a therapist (I have no idea what the system is like in Greece, I'm afraid...) But I'm sure the same laws of confidentiality apply, so the decision about whom to tell, if anybody, is yours - even if the therapist should have an opinion on the matter.

Not everybody is helped by therapy, but many people are, and perhaps you couldn't lose very much by trying it out? For me, it took a few tries with different therapists before I found one I could work with, and I think that's also fairly common.

[Gahara7]

Originally Posted by Crocus

Gahara7, I second what Argonautomobile writes, but I'd also like to say that in my experience a therapist will not tell you that you have to inform anybody else in the world that you're in therapy. It might depend on how old you are, if you are a minor and still living with your parents, and whether you'd have to pay for a therapist (I have no idea what the system is like in Greece, I'm afraid...) But I'm sure the same laws of confidentiality apply, so the decision about whom to tell, if anybody, is yours - even if the therapist should have an opinion on the matter.

I do hope that's the case over here as well... Not having to worry about others knowing of it does put me at ease a little bit.

I'm actually in university righ now, but it's kind of a cultural thing in Greece that you are only considered an adult after you have finished uni. It is expected from pretty much everyone that your parents still have control over at least 70% of your life until your early twenties...and that's why I have the feeling that in some way I will be asked if my parents know.

Originally Posted by Gahara7

I do hope that's the case over here as well... Not having to worry about others knowing of it does put me at ease a little bit.

I'm actually in university righ now, but it's kind of a cultural thing in Greece that you are only considered an adult after you have finished uni. It is expected from pretty much everyone that your parents still have control over at least 70% of your life until your early twenties...and that's why I have the feeling that in some way I will be asked if my parents know.

There's a really lovely member of this forum who lives in Greece, but I haven't seen her around for a bit. This psychologist in Thessaloniki writes about confidentiality and it looks like the same kind of rules I'd expect in my part of the world. (Since my Greek is pretty much limited to "Time is the teacher of humankind" I can't search for Greek-language info...)

Oh, by the way, welcome to PsychCentral!

[Gahara7]

Originally Posted by Crocus

There's a really lovely member of this forum who lives in Greece, but I haven't seen her around for a bit. This psychologist in Thessaloniki writes about confidentiality and it looks like the same kind of rules I'd expect in my part of the world. (Since my Greek is pretty much limited to "Time is the teacher of humankind" I can't search for Greek-language info...)

Oh, by the way, welcome to PsychCentral!

Thanks!
I 'm still not really sure on it, but knowing that I can keep it confidential is kind of a relief...