So what is your definition of a difficult client?

No deadly force was brandished. I was brainwashed into obedience.

I think it would behoove almost every client to stop trying to not be difficult. I think therapy/therapists can reinforce the toxic idea that women who are not compliant must be shut down and punished unless they start being good girls. And that is ********. Women get to take up space, disagree, not be nice, get dirty, dress however they want and make their own decisions. No one, not even a therapist, gets to tell a woman she is difficult for not submitting to them.

I'd agree...in retrospect. However the "risk" of noncompliance can shatter the relationship, a risk some clients feel they can't afford. When I questioned or challenged my therapists they demonstrated their need to dominate through destructive dismissals and derision. They became quite destructive. The repercussions were extremely difficult at the time to shake off. I paid a large price for noncompliance.

It's really terrible you had such dominating therapists. Those few therapists I saw were perfectly fine with me telling them "I don't think it's a good idea and I am not going to do it". And I am a people pleaser.

Were they all women? I see only women Ts but I wonder if you've tried men Ts?

I agree. I've been fortunate enough not to run into therapists and pdocs who were so dominate. Mine were always quite fine with me being outspoken and contrary if I wanted. I never considered that being difficult, nor did they. They considered it advocating for myself and were all about me advocating for myself.

I have run into VERY dominating medical specialists. Some complete assholes of neurosurgeons in dealing with my husband's chronic medical condition. I've personally never run into a specialty with so many God complexes as neurosurgeons; in fact, we're dealing with one right now. GRR!! And when you're dealing with the need for such a specialized treatment as my husband, the pickings are few and far between so you are stuck often for months and years dealing with that ego while you search to find another -- even in a major metropolitan area. (Sorry, ranting as we are in the throws of this right now.)

One man, the rest women, all equally hubristic. The man was the most scornful.

Sorry you are dealing with it. I had an awful internist once. He was later arrested for something he did and it was all over the news. Karma

That's a shame!

Well...it's probably me. T used a word to describe me. I have been analyzing it and ruminating over it. I'll probably ask him what he meant by it and then get upset over it and stop seeing him.