What is the most useless thing the therapist you hire has done?

What is the most useless thing the therapist you hire has done?

Makes suggestions/offers advice based on inaccurate assumptions.

I had one that wrote down word for word what I said. She would hold up a hand after every few words I spoke and painfully write each one down. She wanted to start with my history. She was super hung up on a parent's alcoholism and I was like, lady, that has been the least of my problems. I couldn't get her off of it. Basically, we never made it past family composition or infancy.

Of them all, probably Smaug's ultimatum. She might have been a psychiatrist, but she justified charging for an hour because she said it was therapy.

After that, breathing. I don't mean telling me to breathe, I mean just them breathing. At all.

I desperately miss and need the outdoors. I'm talking about the mountains, thick forests, and lakes/ocean like where I used to live. I was once an active outdoors woman. Paddling 35km from shore was nothing to me. Neither was scrambling up the side of a mountain, snowshoeing the back country, rapelling cliffs, speelunking in caves, etc.

Cruelly, I live now on the barren prairies where what others describe as trees are at best to me described as bush. No topography exists for a 7hr drive in any direction.

My idiot therapist said in response to my 'pining away' for the outdoors to go for a walk in a park. I wanted to kick her in the shins! She absolutely has no clue. What a bag she was. She treated me quite terribly when I pointed out that a walk through a park on a paved path was by no means the same as a 3 day hike.

I put other. The most infuriating two things he ever did were:
a) taking T1's side (so it felt to me) the first time he contacted me. But he apologised and was totally on my side the next time T1 contacted me.
and b) assuming I had found his wife's details by some stalkerish method when actually it was because I happened upon her advertising her services and she shares the same home office as T. He also apologised for that.
I'm glad he listens to me on other stuff, like mindfulness which he does, but I've told him I'm not interested in. He never tries it with me.

Ham-fisted metaphor.

For T1 it would be long, rambling stories which had no discernable point, over-disclosure about his own mental health, and of course contacting me 18 months after termination to tell me he had separated from his wife and asking if I wanted to "catch up".

Omg, those mindfulness print outs! They were stupid and trite. Thats one of the few times I've felt angry with T.

Maybe mindfulness is good and helpful for others or maybe if it had been presented in a different way..but I hated it.

Other things that have often--but not always--been useless: normalization, mindfulness, and sincere looks.

I mostly don't mind the sincere looks, but they make me quite impatient when coupled with bad metaphor or cliche.

"I'm glad there've been some breaks in the clouds."

My first therapist told me I "didn't know what depression was; therefore, I couldn't have experienced it"

What a dork T. That doesn't even make sense.
Sorry u had that experience.

One time he listed out every diagnoses I had. I was like um wtf? It was like he was listing everything wrong with me.

Occasionally she make recommendations that are wrong because she doesn't have all the facts. In her defense though it is usually because I am talking about something and sort of beat around the bush but think she knows what I mean.

I have done few self help workbooks in the past she knows I am capable of using them on my own. She looks online for them and buys them. Once I asked if she thought one on Ptsd would help. She thought it would so she gave me one. I was not ready at all. I tried it for a couple of days and was so triggered that I went into a depression.

Stating the obvious goes for all three of them. Ham fisted metaphor or overuse of metaphor is a good one too

Previous counsellor P's comment 'It's almost like a deep depression' reverberates in my ears. Stupid interpretation....she wasn't far off the mark, but it was that 'like'....would I have been there if it was any more 'like'?

Ex T apologized for their being tissues on the floor and explained that it was her dog. So I conversationally asked what she had. And she hesitated ( Yeah , I know self disclosure , but very innocuous in my opinion - it was a Labrador , there that didn't hurt did it ? ) This was the second session and the last , among the other things was ignoring her notes from the previous week and getting a sheet of paper with what she thought it all was on it and I could go on and on...EMDR T put a fan heater on the desk when I said I felt cold ( which was too much but he was trying to help ) and regular T I don't recall has ever done anything useless.

Mindfulness. I know some people swear by it, but it was completely useless for me (and I told him so).

Most useless thing XT did was suggest I go on a vacation.The reason why her suggestion was useless is because she said it during a session when I was talking about falling behind on my bills.

Me: I fell behind on my bills and need to supplement my income to catch up.
XT: You and your H should think about going away on vacation.

Dumb a s s

Other(s).

First T:
Sessions with him mostly just staring/listening, without any or little input/interaction.
Forcing me into a theoretical framework that he loves and can apparently apply to everyone. Well, not totally useless... I've learned a lot about what's useless for me from those interactions on mechanics and conclusions I try to avoid.

Second (last, so far) T:
Sending me emails that he had received my emails, without any additional info/input.

Guess what I like is meaningful contribution and the lack of it often feels useless to me.

Stating the obvious, which almost always comes across as him sounding like my Dad. I hate that.

I almost forgot the long silences but that was three t's ago. This one talks a lot.

I would have to say - when she stands there watching me do a sand tray and makes these noises like "Ahhh...." or "Mmmmmmhmmm" like she thinks she knows what is going on in my head while I'm creating. Half the time I don't even know what's going on in my head so how could she? Useless noises and they are annoying too. I have learned to tune them out.

Start talking.

That is... awful and funny at the same time. A sad kind of funny though.