Couch 136: Transference Welcome!

It's beautiful!! There's just something about trees and sunshine that calms me so much. Add the breeze and the blue sky and it's better than the beach!

My baby cactus!

It's cute! I've tried to grow cactus plants and I overwater them.

These are drift roses.

I went to my flowers next too!

I don't know what mine are, though. They were here when we moved in.

And your roses are beautiful!!

Thank you! They are very low maintenance. It's hard to tell because the sun is so bright on my phone but those look like knock out roses.

I love everyone's nature photos today! I wish I had some green space.

Well, there's a small area behind our apartment building, but other people would be able to see me from their living rooms and being out there makes me super anxious.

That would make me feel anxious too. I wish you had some green space too! My backyard has a privacy fence on both sides and the back is open to woods.

Maybe there is a park or other place you could go and enjoy the sunshine?

Yep, Southern Arizona. The only time it's ever humid here is when it's actually raining! I grew up in the Midwest (Missouri) and do NOT miss the humidity at all. I do so much better with the dry heat here - staying hydrated is super important and it really helps to work indoors in the a/c. People who work outside like landscaping and road work and stuff - that work happens at night in the hotter months. Plus, it doesn't get quite as hot here as it does up in central Arizona (like the Phoenix area). Then you have Northern Arizona which is another story altogether - so beautiful up there - and it gets colder in the winter and they get snow - lots of snow especially at the North Rim of the Grand Canyon (one of my favorite places in the country!) It's closed in the winter because of snow.

I could carry on about my favorite state all day!

If I am ever able to retire, I would love to move north to Jerome, AZ.

Oh, I loved Arizona when I visited; it's so beautiful! And I agree with you, Artemis. Dry heat is so much more tolerable than humidity.

I do have a ton of parks and things in the area, so maybe tomorrow I'll go on a hike near the river.

Can you do just images from signatures?
I may have snickered out loud at this. Also, can it be SNL's Putin?

Me too, Art, me too.

Yes. I would truly love to visit Arizona. Here in the South, Spring is amazing. I just wish it lasted longer. The humidity is so bad it shuts me down. Jerome. I'm going to check that out.

A hike near a river sounds so wonderful! Please share some pictures tomorrow.

That sounds lovely, a hike near the river! I'd love to see pics!!

One thing I do sometimes miss living in the desert is natural waters... there's a beautiful lake up on Mt Lemmon but I don't get up there near enough. As much as I love the desert, I love water, too! When I was still living in Missouri, and with my ex, we used to go creek-fishing all the time - a combination of hiking and fishing. We'd hike next to (and sometimes in!) different creeks out in the country. Those are some of my favorite memories of the time I spent with him.

Nice photos everyone!

T's always trying to get me to figure out what I want to do. She knows I can do more than what I'm doing now. I know I can, too. But I don't know WHAT, so I stay where I am. I like my current job - well, when I'm not on this stupid project that I'm on now. The problem at work and yes it feels like a problem to me, is that when a person exceeds expectations, it earns them initially yes promotion to Sr CSA which I got a year and a half ago or something, but after that, it just earns you more work. Like you get put on projects "assisting" other departments whose employees make more money because it's harder work - but they still pay us the same. I hate this current project so much but I feel like I can't do anything to get out of it. Friday was so bad I think I shared, that I was tempted to call my old pdoc and ask for a prescription for xanax or something. Or maybe a note from t that says I can't take these calls. I feel like this project is making me go backwards in my efforts at improving my mental health and I hate it. I thought maybe that doing this (and other projects) would look good on my resume and at least get me an interviews when I apply for other positions, but the last 2 I've applied for, they didn't even bother to acknowledge with a personal email let alone an interview - all I got was the generic form letter saying basically "thanks but no thanks." I don't want to change companies, because I love all the people I work with, and I love my "normal" job too, and even most of the projects, but this current one is just messing with my head. So because I don't know exactly what I want to be, I don't have a goal to work towards, so I stay where I'm at. For a "call center" (we do more that the normal call center, but we're still basically a call center) I make damn good money for this area - most call centers pay around $7 an hour less than I make. So I'm staying put for now and praying for the end of this project. Last I heard, it's supposed to be over by June.

Oops. I didn't mean to carry on so much.

Working on a poem, thinking about not knowing what I want to be when I grow up, this is what I have so far. Goodness, I sound depressed. I'm not, at least I don't think so, just a little well, regretful maybe:

So many years
hiding behind the jagged edges of the truth
this life of mine silently slipped by
me watching from the sidelines
always
knowing there was more
but not daring to look for it
because what if I'm wrong
what if it's wrong
endless what if's
and thoughts of
“I'll never be good enough”:
stop signs
at every
turn.

aaaaaaaaaand Artie kills the couch with all her blabbering.

I'm here. I'm just reading. I don't really have much to say. I'm in a quiet mood.

Um... that's M.C. Escher.

My lounge chair was feeling so comfy I dozed off. Got a bit too much sun. Hope it browns quickly.

Your poem is beautiful and heart felt Art. I would miss the water too if I lived where there wasn't any. There is a creek that runs behind my backyard and I enjoy it very much.

I have a fountain in my backyard, but the pump broke, and I haven't bought a new one yet. I really should get that taken care of.

Keep reading - she changed it again.