Home Menu

Menu


Reply
Thread Tools Display Modes
  #1  
Old Apr 25, 2017, 04:23 PM
colorsofthewind12 colorsofthewind12 is offline
Member
 
Member Since: Nov 2015
Location: Somewhere
Posts: 213
I am really confused as to whether I should continue seeing my current T.

We bonded well initially and in general things could be going well for a couple of weeks and then every so often I feel very misunderstood. Lately, I am feeling that he is frustrated and bored by my lack of progress(yawns during session, gets visibly irritated).

I am also feeling frustrated(so I am not just projecting) and feeling stuck by my very slow progress

For the most part, I really like him and respect him (even though I am not feeling that now) but is that enough?

I wonder if my lack of progress is because of me not trying hard enough or if it's because of our pairing especially since this therapist came highly recommended and apparently is very successful with complex cases. But I am not seeing that. It makes me feel even more ****** and confirms my own belief that I am "unfixable" and too damaged to be helped.

I am just someone who is concerned as I am investing a lot(time, energy, money) into this therapy.

I am feeling incredibly lost and hopeless.
Hugs from:
cinnamon_roll

advertisement
  #2  
Old Apr 25, 2017, 04:30 PM
cinnamon_roll's Avatar
cinnamon_roll cinnamon_roll is offline
Member
 
Member Since: Sep 2013
Location: Europe
Posts: 272
Can you tell him how you feel? What you've written here?
  #3  
Old Apr 25, 2017, 04:54 PM
colorsofthewind12 colorsofthewind12 is offline
Member
 
Member Since: Nov 2015
Location: Somewhere
Posts: 213
Quote:
Originally Posted by cinnamon_roll View Post
Can you tell him how you feel? What you've written here?
I could but I don't see the point. Either he will get defensive which will cause a big fight or or somehow smooth things over.

I've been here before with my T many times. Nothing seems to get resolved even though superficially it may appear to be.
  #4  
Old Apr 25, 2017, 11:57 PM
cinnamon_roll's Avatar
cinnamon_roll cinnamon_roll is offline
Member
 
Member Since: Sep 2013
Location: Europe
Posts: 272
Quote:
Originally Posted by colorsofthewind12 View Post
I could but I don't see the point. Either he will get defensive which will cause a big fight or or somehow smooth things over.

I've been here before with my T many times. Nothing seems to get resolved even though superficially it may appear to be.
How do you know how he would react? is ist experience because you tried to in the past? or is it your own perception of what he might do?

Quote:
Lately, I am feeling that he is frustrated and bored by my lack of progress(yawns during session, gets visibly irritated).
That is your interpretation. Why don't you ask him: "Are you frustrated and bored? I get the impression from XYZ that you might be..."
I am very often under the impression (convinced!!) that my T is angry at me. Quite often when I mention this, this brings about the really meaningful and deep converstations about core issues.

Quote:
I am also feeling frustrated(so I am not just projecting) and feeling stuck by my very slow progress
You could tell him this as well, tell him that you feel stuck. That you feel there isn't much progress or that you are frustrated because you feel not much is changing... Make this about YOU and not your T. How YOU feel. That you are wondering sometimes whether you are "unfixable".

It is in those moments when I'm telling my T those ^^^things, that we can really move forward and cover some new ground. My T might then ask me, what do I mean by "unfixable"? What makes me feel that way? Is this a permanent feeling or has this been triggered by something? Maybe something she said or did?

And, you know, you could be projecting your own frustration onto your T... Just a thought.

No-one here can tell you whether your T is a good fit for you or not. You have to decide. Also, your T cannot "fix" you - unfortunately that is your responsibility. Your T can help you along the way, guide you, give his input, encourage you. But bringing about change? That's up to you
Thanks for this!
colorsofthewind12, kecanoe
Reply
Views: 684

attentionThis is an old thread. You probably should not post your reply to it, as the original poster is unlikely to see it.




All times are GMT -5. The time now is 10:36 PM.
Powered by vBulletin® — Copyright © 2000 - 2025, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.




 

My Support Forums

My Support Forums is the online community that was originally begun as the Psych Central Forums in 2001. It now runs as an independent self-help support group community for mental health, personality, and psychological issues and is overseen by a group of dedicated, caring volunteers from around the world.

 

Helplines and Lifelines

The material on this site is for informational purposes only, and is not a substitute for medical advice, diagnosis or treatment provided by a qualified health care provider.

Always consult your doctor or mental health professional before trying anything you read here.