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  #1  
Old Jun 03, 2017, 08:15 PM
Lulu_d Lulu_d is offline
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Member Since: Nov 2016
Location: Midwest
Posts: 10
I cancelled an appointment on short notice right before Memorial Day because I had an emergency at work and couldn't leave in time to make it to my appointment. When I texted her to let her know I couldn't make it she responded no problem. Then a bit later she texted that I would be charged a fee for not giving 24 hr notice. I didn't respond because I didn't think I needed to. The next week she emailed me and asked if I wanted to set up another appointment and that she was adding another day to her schedule. I didn't check my email for a few days and so I didn't see it right away. When I did I responded and asked her availability. She has yet to respond to that email. I don't know what to do now. One of the main things I go to therapy for is trust /abandonment issues from my childhood. I am too ashamed to email or text her again. I don't know what to do next. I had a really hard time getting therapy from her anyway because my previous therapist went to jail and left me feeling highly abandoned and unable to trust a new therapist. I don't even feel like I fully trust her yet anyway and now this. I'm in the midst of a large anxiety producing ongoing issue at work and I really need support, but what am I supposed to do? Sorry if I'm rambling.
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brillskep, growlycat, LonesomeTonight, lucozader, Sarmas, skysblue, unaluna

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  #2  
Old Jun 03, 2017, 08:21 PM
atisketatasket's Avatar
atisketatasket atisketatasket is offline
Child of a lesser god
 
Member Since: Jun 2015
Location: Tartarus
Posts: 19,394
Why not call her? Sometimes emails get lost, sometimes therapists get busy.

Also it seems like she can't have been out of touch for more than a few days? Memorial Day was less than a week ago.
Thanks for this!
awkwardlyyours, brillskep, iheartjacques, LonesomeTonight, lucozader, unaluna
  #3  
Old Jun 03, 2017, 08:28 PM
Sarmas Sarmas is offline
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Member Since: Apr 2016
Location: Ny
Posts: 860
Sorry to hear that. How often do see her? I can see why your bothered. Hopefully she hasn't responded because shes busy and hasn't gotten a chance to answer. I would be stuck in the same situation not knowing if I should send another email or not. I would be afraid of being pushy. However I don't see the harm In sending another email and explaining that you didn't see her past email until a few days later. I would just use a nice brief response and see what happens from there.

As far as fees some Ts are very strict about their fees while others are a little more forgiving depending on the circumstance. I had a T once that gave me a warning the first time and didn't charge me. She warned me that smi would have to pay the fee the next time if it the cancellation was less than 24hrs. Eventhough I knew that it was her policy I felt like it placed a wall between us. I also have abandonement issues as well. However it is a business and it's how Ts form their boundaries and try to keep their business going. I can see how this creates trust issues in the therpeutic relationship. When you see her perhaps you should mention it.
Thanks for this!
unaluna
  #4  
Old Jun 04, 2017, 06:07 AM
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reb569 reb569 is offline
Poohbah
 
Member Since: Feb 2017
Location: Central New York
Posts: 1,229
I would pick up the phone and call her.
__________________
"Do you know what’s really scary? You want to forget something. Totally wipe it off your mind. But you never can. It can’t go away, you see. And… and it follows you around like a ghost."
~ A Tale of Two Sisters (Janghwa, Hongryeon) (2003)

"I feel like an outsider, and I always will feel like one. I’ve always felt that I wasn’t a member of any particular group."
~ Anne Rice
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atisketatasket, LonesomeTonight, unaluna
  #5  
Old Jun 04, 2017, 10:56 PM
kecanoe kecanoe is offline
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Member Since: Aug 2008
Location: Illinois, USA
Posts: 3,052
I would call. Perhaps she didn't see your email. It would be helpful for me to hear ts voice if I were unsure how t was feeling.
Thanks for this!
LonesomeTonight, unaluna
  #6  
Old Jun 04, 2017, 11:13 PM
Pennster Pennster is offline
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Member Since: Aug 2013
Location: US
Posts: 1,030
I would call as well- my therapist has sometimes missed emails coming in, or has had emails he's thought he has replied to that he hasn't, by accident.
Thanks for this!
LonesomeTonight, unaluna
  #7  
Old Jun 05, 2017, 04:01 AM
Merecat Merecat is offline
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Member Since: Apr 2015
Location: UK
Posts: 292
When did you email her asking about availability? It may have landed with her over the weekend when she isn't working. If it's been more that a full working day I'd drop her another email otherwise I'd wait for a day or two. As a previous poster said, it can't be that long given Memorial Day was a week ago.
Thanks for this!
LonesomeTonight
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