therapist abuse

Hi everyone,
I am a 27 years old female who had relationship and career issues for a long time.
I have been seeing a new therapist for a month. when we started he claimed that he treats people using hypnotherapy, which I am completely unfamiliar with. through our sessions he started hugging me as a step in transferring energy into my chakras. Since the very first session he told me that your second chakra is more open to energy ( which is located at the root of sexual organs, along the spine in the subtle body.)
As our sessions continued he touched me more and more and in our last session he kissed me more than once.
He insists that whatever happens during the sessions are for your treatment and you are the one controlling everything (meaning that you are the one who wants to kiss me!!!). So, do whatever you want.
I am concerned and frightened here. I don't know whether this is really a kind of treatment or he is abusing me?!
he has helped me through my relationship and career issues and I have made great progress. But with the situation I explained should I talk to him about it? should i quit?
I am really confused here...

Hi Anna. Welcome to the forum, and thank you for sharing your story. This is not appropriate behavior on the part of your therapist - this is abuse. It is not okay. I'm sorry that this happened, and I urge you to :

1) Relinquish all contact with this man

2) Report him to the appropriate licensing board. I'm sure someone here will have more information about how to do this.

You can also find resources here: TELL: Therapy Exploitation Link Line

Again, I'm sorry this happened. It was not appropriate or ethical.

If you are concerned and frightened, which you say that you are, that is a big red flag. My gut instinct is to suggest that you don't go back to see him alone, but I understand what it is like to have a working relationship with someone who has helped you and in whom you feel you have some trust and/or loyalty.

I don't know you or your therapist or the type of work you are doing BUT I can tell you that if you are feeling uncomfortable you need to have the behavior from your therapist stop. It must not continue. How you choose to have it stop is up to you. You could stop seeing him, you could talk to him (though it sounds like perhaps you have a bit and he told you it was coming from you??), you could bring a friend/family member to your next session when you talk with him about this so that there is a neutral party present when the discussion happens if you think he may try to be manipulative or may become angry.

You sound concerned about what is happening and you wouldn't be concerned about it if YOU were ok with it. Right or wrong on the therapist's part (and personally, I think it is WRONG - but that is just my opinion) the fact that YOU feel concerned and frightened by the behavior is a signal to yourself that it needs to stop. Please try to find it within yourself to stand up for yourself with this therapist in the way you need to. I know this isn't easy, but you can do it. You have taken the first step here.

Doogie

Report him!

My T dies hypnotherapy, as well, but what that man is doing is not okay. Trust your gut, stop seeing him, and report him.

Did you ask him ot allow him to touch you, to kiss you? A hug is fine with me if both agree (I have hugged my T), but a kiss is inappropriate in any case, imho.

Just as a contrast, my T maintains a 3 foot rule with all patients. There is no time in which kissing is part of treatment. I am so sorry this is happening to you; your trust is being broken. If you do go back, try to leave your phone on record so you can have many options.

I’m really sorry this is happening to you. As you said in your title, this is abuse not therapy and as other said you’d have any reason to report this man and press charges. I would recommand you not to see him again anyway, everything about this situation is wrong.

Yeah, this guy is bad news. Kissing is never a part of therapy. The chakra stuff isn’t even therapy or evidence based at all. Please run!

Yes — run as fast as you can and report this man. This is psychological manipulation and sexual abuse.

Is this thru the NHS or private?

This guy sounds like a fraud and a charlatan and potentially worse, I'd be inclined not to see him again and report him to the appropriate authorities

The touching and kissing is bad enough but god knows what he could do if he actually got to hypnotise someone.

Welcome to the forum - sadly we welcome you with a problem of abuse in therapy. This man is unethical and manipulative - please leave immediately for your own safety. I understand this is confusing you , so do continue to post on how you are feeling , we are a supportive group here.

I don't think it matters if it is abuse or not - if a therapist makes you uncomfortable and feels creepy - I would find a new one.

Hello again and thanks for your answers and support.
I talked to him on the phone. He answered calmly and was not surprised at all, like he was expecting such a conversation. But he did not confirm that anything unusual has happened during the sessions. He insisted that he uses a unique method of hypnotherapy which is not used regularly. All in all he said it's totally fine, don't come. But let me know when you want to come back! Like he was sure I am going to go back to him again.
He was weird and said I knew you will make this phone call. Sometimes I feel like he can read my mind!
I am still confused. I don't know if it was the right thing to do.

I think Chakra therapy and other kinds of energy work can be a legitimate treatment modality. I've read a little about it, but I don't think kissing is part of it. I think kissing is sexual and that he is grooming you for more sexualized contact. I think you should run away from this T and not look back.

Chakra and energy work are valid with an ethical practitioner , but they DO NOT involve kissing or any sexual contact. If you look at a list of " red flags " for therapy , you will see there are several for this man. He is " unique " only he works in this way , you shouldn't be concerned ( Yes , you most certainly should ) he is cultivating that he is " mysterious " and can read your mind and knows what you need. But he has helped you in some ways , so you're confused. That is part of grooming you , which is what he is doing. Agree with others , leave and don't look back. I'm so sorry this has happened to you.

He is playing mind games when he claims he knew you would call and that you will go back. Stay away and don't contact him again.

I want to second this comment and all the others in a similar vein. Run don't walk.

Exactly, he can't read your mind, he just wants to make himself appear all knowing and powerful. It's just a trick.

I agree with others, definitely red flags! Of course he expects that some clients will point out his unethical behaviour. So in that sense, I believe he could have sensed that you're intelligent and assertive enough to question his inappropriate methods. He had that manipulative speech prepared in advance for clients like you.
Run away and report!

Is he registered with BACP or UKCP?