Asking for a transitional object

I think it's simply because she doesn't give big gifts, only small ones. I know it's not because of the money because I offered to pay for it. It's just one of her boundaries.

I think this would have been very comforting.

@xynesthesia I think that's why I turned my T down. I didn't want to choose, I wanted her to choose.

A few years ago I was in a very bad place and my t at the time had to go away for two weeks. I didn't think to ask her for a transitional object but she picked out a card with a Cassatt painting on it ("Nurse Reading to a Little Girl") and wrote me a short letter. While she was gone I read the letter every night and looked at the picture a great deal. It helped a lot.

I was recently separated from my current t for a long while because of our overlapping vacation schedules. In the last session before I left town, I was telling her how scared I was that I would decompensate. I don't remember exactly how the conversation went... but I do remember her saying, "I don't think you're someone who would benefit from a transitional object," to which I immediately replied, "no, I'm not." I don't know why she said that, or why I agreed with her, given that I clearly have benefited from transitional objects in the past... though she and I have only been working together for like six months and also she's younger than my former t (current-t is ~10 years older than I am, whereas former-t is I dunno like 30-40 years older?) and our relationship feels more older-sisterly than maternal. I would definitely have felt extremely awkward accepting a transitional object from her, and I don't think I would want one that she gave me.

Despite all that, I did take her business card with her cell number with me when I was out of town. So for reasons that are not clear to me, I do want a transitional object but I don't want one that was given to me for that purpose.

Therapy's weird, folks.

Sometimes. It helped a lot at first. She gave it to me during a difficult phase in therapy, right before I went out of town and she moved offices. After several months it started to feel more like mine instead of hers, so I left it with her for a while for "recharging." I definitely still carry it in my pocket all the time, though, and I do mess with it when I feel anxious. It's one of a few things that I turn to when I want to feel connected to her between sessions.

I've been reading about this concept of "recharging" pretty much since I joined. I have a hard time with something lasting as an object for very long. I've often thought that it was the novelty of the object that made it work for me and once it wasn't novel any more then it lost the connection. What does recharging feel like? Is it like getting it for the first time or? I am not sure if "recharging" would work for me.

Also, I've pretty much created my own objects, so maybe that's part of why they don't really last. Sure they are things that have come from her or been connected to her. They were not given as transitional objects, not specifically given to me as something "special" from her. So, maybe that plays in it too.

The "recharging" helps, but it isn't as good as getting the object originally. When I first got my object, there was something around the novelty of having a tangible item from my T, rather than something like a voicemail or an email or a photo on my phone. There was definitely also something around her seeing that I really needed something to hold onto between sessions and her meeting that need for me. Acknowledging my difficult feelings and wanting to come through for me. The recharging is kind of like that, except I have to ask. But she agrees to hold onto it when I ask, and I think about it sitting in a certain spot in her office with her all day, and then when she gives it back we have the moment when it changes hands again. So I find that satisfying on some level, even if it doesn't feel quite as good.

Client before me. I accidentally arrived early and was sitting in my car when she left. Takes the f&) %king blanket with her. Cuddles it walking up the street.
Im gonna ask for the couch. Ain't no other client outdoing me

In my 18 years of therapy I've never heard this term. Is this a new thing? I don't tend to think about my therapist outside of a session except when in crisis then feel bad about calling them and bothering them. At this point though with the therapist I'm working with now it's more like a weekly 10 min check in. Yes I'm still alive, this is what I'm gonna do this week, mood is fine. I have a couple people checking on me with me making the "yes I'm still alive" answer cause my husband is out of town till november. lol.

I so want to ask for one. I'm going to try to address the difficult time between sessions especially when a present day crisis or trauma has happened. Hmmmm?

Easily the funniest comment I've read on here. I relate too much to that mindset. I am still laughing

I sort of created my own transitional object from some Kleenex from his office box. They have been in my hoodie pocket since last April, I think. I told him about them. I hope he didn't think it was too weird. He also wrote me a letter for me to read while he was on his last 2-week vacation.

I have a couple of things, one is an item from T's office another is something T brought back from holidays and the third on is something i am attached too that goes with T on holidays so as to keep her safe and so I still feel connected when she's away. We do out of session contact too

I gave my T a transitional object. I bought polished stones from Brazil and put them on the table next to the clients chair so they can be fidgeted with. So when he sees them using them he will think of me. He said clients have noticed them and used them.