Couch 174: Good Lord, Those People

WarmFuzzySocks · Aug 10, 2018, 07:16 PM

@@,
My reaction was literally what Art said. I even said it aloud when I read your post: What the actual hell? Also a word that won't make it past the auto censor.

OUCH.
Hugs (if you want).

CantExplain · Aug 10, 2018, 07:19 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by BlessedCheeseMaker

I dont really know what is wrong with me. My t is going away for a month i will miss 3 sessions and now all of a sudden i want to talk about important stuff like csa.

Nothing wrong with you. It's just the "doorknob reveal" writ large. Parting from T triggers feelings of abandonment that (of course) are not present when you are there.

CantExplain · Aug 10, 2018, 07:21 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by unaluna

I was a disappointment to my mother because i was flat-chested. Which i did not inherit from her, but from my fathers side. I wasnt a problem or pain so much as worthless as a woman and therefore as a human being.

Like that? This was the existential dilemma of my teens and twenties, only it was too ridiculous to be true, so it was like i couldnt even talk about it with anyone. Also it was before "everybody" started getting boob jobs as a matter of course.

((Luna))

I'm really sorry.

CantExplain · Aug 10, 2018, 07:23 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by atisketatasket

I asked Piaf why, if it’s so exhausting and hard and frustrating to be my therapist because of my hearing (part of what she said), she didn’t just suggest I find another therapist who was a better match?

She said I’d told her other therapists had suggested they weren’t the therapist for me and she didn’t want to do that.

I asked if that meant she felt like she had to keep seeing me.

She didn’t give a direct answer.

I don't think it is ever fair to tell a patient that she is "difficult" in any way, if she is doing her best. And that goes for students, too.

susannahsays · Aug 10, 2018, 07:25 PM

Did she actually use the words "exhausting" and "frustrating" @@?

CantExplain · Aug 10, 2018, 07:29 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by atisketatasket

Piaf would completely disagree with you. The relationship is not important. Therefore there are no such things as ruptures that strengthen the relationship.

Or if there are ruptures, she doesn’t want to hear about them.

This T sounds pretty ... unorthodox.

atisketatasket · Aug 10, 2018, 07:35 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by susannahsays

Did she actually use the words "exhausting" and "frustrating" @@?

Yes, she did.

She likes to be direct.

WarmFuzzySocks · Aug 10, 2018, 07:46 PM

It is possible to be direct without being rude or insulting. Just because she's a therapist doesn't give her a free pass. Geez.

Aug 10, 2018, 07:55 PM

Yeah, I mean I agree @@, Piaf is totally in the wrong here. It does not seem professional based on what you are telling us. I like direct. I appreciate direct. But she was just a bi*ch, unprofessional and wrong. She really screwed up and dropped the ball. I’m sorry. Hugs.

CantExplain · Aug 10, 2018, 08:00 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by WarmFuzzySocks

Just because she's a therapist doesn't give her a free pass.

They tend to assume it does. The "power trip" theory of therapy looks awfully convincing, sometimes.

CantExplain · Aug 10, 2018, 08:04 PM

W has formed an hypothesis that would explain Piaf's behaviour, but to my mind would still not excuse it.

LonesomeTonight · Aug 10, 2018, 08:18 PM

...And H being a **** to me again for no apparent reason.

susannahsays · Aug 10, 2018, 08:19 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by atisketatasket

Yes, she did.

She likes to be direct.

I'm sorry, that's horrible - and especially saying that about something you can't help.

atisketatasket · Aug 10, 2018, 08:19 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by CantExplain

W has formed an hypothesis that would explain Piaf's behaviour, but to my mind would still not excuse it.

I’m all ears on the hypothesis.

ScarletPimpernel · Aug 10, 2018, 08:20 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by LonesomeTonight

Oh, I didn't realize the police took you in--I thought since you were getting in the car when they got there, they just let you go. It is good your H took you seriously, though I don't know how I'd feel if my H called police on me either. Does your H seem to realize how much his frequent ER visits are affecting you?

I think now he does.

ScarletPimpernel · Aug 10, 2018, 08:23 PM

I'm out of the hospital. So boring! I didn't sleep at all, and barely ate. They do absolutely nothing except make sure you're safe. But I guess that's the point. My T was so nice to me today. She called me and emailed me a bunch of times.

skeksi · 08:57 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by atisketatasket

I asked Piaf why, if it’s so exhausting and hard and frustrating to be my therapist because of my hearing (part of what she said), she didn’t just suggest I find another therapist who was a better match?

She said I’d told her other therapists had suggested they weren’t the therapist for me and she didn’t want to do that.

I asked if that meant she felt like she had to keep seeing me.

She didn’t give a direct answer.

I find it really frustrating that she 1. Expressed her exhaustion and frustration to you (it’s not like you can change the hearing issue) and 2. Didn’t stop to think how exhausting and frustrating it must be for YOU, to have trouble hearing.

Aug 10, 2018, 08:35 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by LonesomeTonight

...And H being a **** to me again for no apparent reason.

I'm so sorry. That really sucks.

My h said he was just teasing me earlier while we were driving here. He said he didn't know I was serious about being so nervous on the highway. How could he not know I was serious?!! Are men just ****ing dense?!?! (sorry couch males. you are excluded from that statement.)

LonesomeTonight · Aug 10, 2018, 08:39 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ArtieSwimsOn

I'm so sorry. That really sucks.

My h said he was just teasing me earlier while we were driving here. He said he didn't know I was serious about being so nervous on the highway. How could he not know I was serious?!! Are men just ****ing dense?!?! (sorry couch males. you are excluded from that statement.)

Thanks, Art. I'm probably overreacting. Sorry your H wasn't taking you seriously.

My T would probably agree that men are dense/stupid. I recall something from yesterday's session where he was just saying that men are stupid, including himself in there.

DP_2017 · Aug 10, 2018, 09:03 PM

8 day break from my job! Finally... just my dog and I. This is gonna be great.

CantExplain · Aug 10, 2018, 09:05 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by atisketatasket

I’m all ears on the hypothesis.

I'll PM you.

Aug 10, 2018, 09:05 PM

as much as i fought against going to therapy weekly, i'm so happy that i did it. i have so been my own worst enemy. no more. no more, i say! the only 'bad' thing about going weekly is it makes me want to go twice a week!!

off to the pool.

atisketatasket · Aug 10, 2018, 09:18 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by CantExplain

This T sounds pretty ... unorthodox.

At least if I decide to leave she won’t give me the “you’ve got to stay so we can work this out” spiel.

Aug 10, 2018, 09:59 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by atisketatasket

I asked Piaf why, if it’s so exhausting and hard and frustrating to be my therapist because of my hearing (part of what she said), she didn’t just suggest I find another therapist who was a better match?

She said I’d told her other therapists had suggested they weren’t the therapist for me and she didn’t want to do that.

I asked if that meant she felt like she had to keep seeing me.

She didn’t give a direct answer.

Wow, just what the Eff, Piaf. Wow, I want to blast her.

Aug 10, 2018, 10:11 PM

I just went swimming for a bit, the water felt really nice, it's a pretty small pool for as nice as this hotel is! back to my room and sipping some more wine. relaxing my *** off feels good. h is still downstairs, so i assume he's doing pretty good in the tourney.

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Couch 174: Good Lord, Those People

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