[SummerTime12]

Would you bring it up to your T if you need to have fewer sessions because of money issues? Or just take a break/cut back without mentioning the reason? I don’t want my T to think I’m not wanting to put in the work anymore, but I also don’t want him to feel bad I’m having money issues just in case he would offer a discount or something like that. I don’t want him to think I’m telling him because I’m asking for a lower rate.
I’m feeling really torn about cutting back on therapy since I’m going through a lot right now, but I feel guilty for even hesitating because we’re barely making our mortgage. I feel selfish for wanting to keep going to my T every week when we’re struggling so much.

[CharlieStarDust]

Yup - when I changed jobs I had to take a pay cut and a huge source of stress was finances. It came up in general terms that I was struggling financially. After a while she offered a lower rate. I always thought I’d refuse, but really needed it and realistically, she wouldn’t offer it if she couldn’t afford it. Additionally, I’d been with her for several years and she knew i wasn’t trying to get a lower rate by talking about money. If that makes sense?

Sorry to hear you’re in a bind. If you have a good relationship with your T, bring it up - you might be surprised.

[velcro003]

yes. when i had like $2 in the bank account, she let me suspend paying her until i got back on my feet again and could pay her back.

[starfishing]

Yes, if it were bad enough that I was considering stopping or cutting back on therapy, I would definitely let the therapist know what was going on.

[CantExplain]

Yes, you can tell your T that.

[PurpleBlur]

Yes tell her

[Taylor27]

Yes tell her

[ruh roh]

Kind of. I told her that my expenses exceeded my income and that one of the reasons I wanted to cut back was to be able to contribute to a retirement account, which was at zero. So I cut back from twice a week to once a week, and some months later she said to consider using my insurance instead of private pay, so I did that as well. I don't think she would ever give me a discount, but it was enough that she suggested and accepted insurance payments. I should have done it a long time ago.

I doubt it.

I had one therapist who was more interested in being payed than she was at helping me

I think that's scared me off saying anything like that

[awkwardlyyours]

Originally Posted by SummerTime12

Would you bring it up to your T if you need to have fewer sessions because of money issues? Or just take a break/cut back without mentioning the reason? I don’t want my T to think I’m not wanting to put in the work anymore, but I also don’t want him to feel bad I’m having money issues just in case he would offer a discount or something like that. I don’t want him to think I’m telling him because I’m asking for a lower rate.
I’m feeling really torn about cutting back on therapy since I’m going through a lot right now, but I feel guilty for even hesitating because we’re barely making our mortgage. I feel selfish for wanting to keep going to my T every week when we’re struggling so much.

Just say all of it? That you're worried he'll think you're asking for a lower rate but you don't want to cut back etc?

Regardless of the answer, not saying it I think will act as a barrier to your ability to continue therapy -- with or without taking a break?

I think a large part of it is trust -- if you've been working with him for a while, does he trust (including in his abilities to assess your 'character') that you're genuinely in a hole and not out to swindle him? Or, is he the sort that is more likely to get all kinds of weird and try to go strictly by the book when it comes to money?

He could say 'Yes' or he could say 'No' -- I think either way, I'd want to know where my therapist stands. To me, it's one of those is-this-really-a-relationship? junctures -- especially if you've been seeing him for a while.

That's not to say that if he says 'No', it's automatically a reflection of you -- it could be that he's been burnt in the past and so on and so forth.

[peacelizard]

I'd have a hard time with it initially but I'd feel obligated to eventually

[venusss]

YES, tell her. In that way you can come up with some strategy to do the work with less amount of session and work on coping mechanisms in between.


You are probably not the only client ever that had money issues. They will know what to do.

[GeekyOne]

I have told my T this. All of it, even.

She stopped taking my insurance 6 months after I started seeing her. She knew I couldn't afford to see her at the cash rate, so she offered to let me to pay her the rate my insurance had been paying her (total value, not just my copay). I gratefully accepted.

A year after I started seeing her, I took 3 months off work on short term disability to do ECT, among other things. STD only paid me about 25% of my usual paycheque, so I told her I'd be down to seeing her once a month while I was off work. She was not okay with that, wanted to keep me at 1x/week so she dropped her fee entirely.

We talked about it a lot because it made me incredibly uncomfortable. Eventually, though, I had to admit that a) she, unlike most people, had the training to put thought into the offer and wouldn't have made it if she weren't okay with it and b) it was possible she could care about me even if I didn't pay her.

Option a) is what really got me through it. Occasionally since then she has comp'd a session or I've forgotten a cheque and it tends to wrack me with guilt. Then we talk about why it's so hard for me to believe that someone might care for me.

[SummerTime12]

Thank you all for the feedback! There was a time (I think maybe 6-8 months ago?) that I called the receptionist and canceled the next few sessions with my T without telling him why, but then he called me and got it out of me that it was a money issue. He then offered me 2 free sessions because he didn’t want me to just not come in the middle of the work we were doing. After a lot of hesitation, I eventually accepted. I felt really guilty though so I just don’t want that to happen again. I know if he does offer something similar or a discount I could just refuse this time around, but I guess I wouldn’t want him to think I’m hinting at anything since he responded by offering the 2 free sessions last time. I’ve been seeing him for almost 2 years if that makes any difference.

[coolibrarian]

Yes, I have told her, and she adjusted her rates for me.

[nottrustin]

I sort of had to bring this up today. My husband had a couple of job interviews for positions that will ne much better for him physically bit the insurance will have a deductable where as currently we have a pretty low copay. Her response was that we would cross that bridge and discuss it if the issue arises. She said some people see her every other week until the deductable is met but we will figure it out. She bills insurance $220 each time. I pay $25 and insurance pays $41

Kind of sad because when I gave a similar situation a few years ago, T said don't worry we will figure it all out. She wasn't go anyway so we could figure out something that would work even if it meant making some payments.

[SlumberKitty]

I've asked for a sliding scale rate before, and always gotten it.