[DelusionsDaily]

So, since my therapy session 2 weeks ago I have had this strange disconnected feeling. I don’t know how to explain it, other than my emotions, thoughts, and any physical sensations don’t feel real or like they are mine. I don’t know what this is. It’s happening soooooo much it’s a bit distressing in itself. I will say it was a strange and uncomfortable session 2 weeks ago. Near the end we discussed the very likely possibility that some kind of childhood trauma took place and my mind has just completely blocked it for all these years. (T didn’t bring it up I brought up a previous T who asked me a question regard childhood trauma)

Anyone have any idea what this might be? I’m gonna email T too but just wondered.

[HowDoYouFeelMeow?]

Sounds like a dissociative issue called depersonalization. It’s more common in survivors of childhood trauma.

[seeker33]

Agree, probably dissociation/depersonalisation. It happens to me, too. It sucks and can be scary. But when you have a name for it and know why it happens it's a tiny bit more manageable.

[Anne2.0]

I agree that it sounds a lot like depersonalization from your brief description, but I also wonder if it could be an extended or repeated emotional flashback. An emotional flashback, in my experience, doesn't have the auditory or visual or other sensory cues of a complete experience (e.g. classic war veteran flashback, hears car backfiring and leaps into a crouched position, clutching imaginary gun). An emotional flashback is like the "feeling" analog to this, in the sense that the body is not reacting to a conscious or complete or triggered memory, but to a memory that may be in the subconscious or unconscious. So you have the emotional feeling that something has happened, but because the memory is not accessible, the feelings do not feel connected to it, and like they don't belong to you. And the emotional flashback to a past trauma can be dissociation or depersonalization itself, as those are often responses immediately after trauma, typically creative and excellent coping strategies.

I find what you're describing pretty distressing, no matter what it is, and it has sometimes helped for me to dig a little deeper into the thing, to see what it is trying to tell me. Could be your brain's way of trying to resolve this for you.

[DelusionsDaily]

Hi everyone, thanks for the responses. I’ll read a bit on dissociation and see about emotional flashbacks if I can find anything. Also haven’t emailed T yet, I was so tired last night.

[Fuzzybear]

[DelusionsDaily]

So, I’ve done a little reading. Is grounding a good thing to try at home until I can see my T? I have emailed her but I have been in more maintenance type therapy with her(once every 3-4 months). I don’t want stuff to come up(especially if trauma related-no conscious memory of anything ever) and be unprepared. So, I’m not sure how to handle this. T will get back to me it might be a day or two but I will get a reply. Just wondered.

[coolibrarian]

I find that I have spates of depersonalization which often happen when I am anxious. If I can, and if I remember, I try to ground myself with breathing exercises, or listening to music, meditating, etc.

[mountainstream]